This one is tricky. I think it depends on the person. I’ve had great experiences where I was able to have great conversations that led to a friendship.
I prefer friends, but I’ll take what I can get, which right now is nothing. Can’t be too picky.
I can grow alone, heal alone, self-soothe alone, self-regulate alone, and walk through the world alone while wearing a brave face and crying myself to sleep every night, but I don’t want to have to.
Before I got involved in platonic cuddling "officially",
I had what I called "friends, (comma) with benefits" and would joke/explain the emphasis on the first part since most people associate the term with casual sex partners. For me and my flavor of polyamory/ethical non-monogamy, instead these friends are more intimate than my more traditional friends, but not as involved or committed as a full partner and while cuddling was almost always involved sex wasn't necessarily. So I suppose my version of FWB would be more like "quasi-romantic/platonic cuddle friends with option for more physical intimacy"... but that's a mouth full 🤣 I even called some of them "cuddle buddies" until I actually started doing platonic cuddling recreationally.
Reason I bring this up is that what several have described here reminds me of those relationships, and thus the Relationship Anarchy Smorgasbord. For those unfamiliar, a smorgasbord is kinda like a buffet table of foods you can pick and choose from to fill your plate. In this case, it's about building relationships not around specific catch-all labels ("boyfriend", "wife", "friend"), but rather around shared goals, traits, and experiences. It's a relationship tool used for discussion with your friend/partner or potential friend/partner to discuss boundaries and expectations, check compatibility, negotiate needs and wants, etc.
Everyone defines "friend" and "platonic" a little bit differently, so this tool can help you articulate what exactly you need and expect within your platonic cuddleship. It's best not to assume that your cuddle partner uses the same definitions as you - have a conversation.
Hope some find this useful 🙂 I'm attaching the three most common versions, but you can Google search others or make your own!
Here's an example I did for my longest cuddle partner I've had for a few years now. I x-ed out the sections we decided were off the table, highlighted the areas we agreed to, and left anything blank that was open to future negotiation/changes.
...this, that, and the other thing... Meh. Whatever.
We often do. 🙂
You can take me to school anytime @cuddlefaery 👩🏻🏫😇😂