Should a Pro Message Potential Clients?

Howdy folks,

In another thread, a few people were unhappy that cuddlers weren’t responding to their messages.

At first I thought they were talking about enthusiasts not replying, which I figured must happen all the time and didn’t concern me, personally. But it came up that neither enthusiasts NOR pros were responding. Obviously there could be reasons for that, too — they’re busy, they’re not really active on the site, or just other personal reasons...

But then someone mentioned that for both enthusiasts AND pros, they had better luck being messaged rather than messaging.

It honestly never occurred to me to message potential clients — I figured that would look, I don’t know, unprofessional and spammy?

What do you think? If you’re a pro, have you ever messaged potential clients? And if you’re a client/enthusiast would you like a pro to message you, or is that way weird?

I’m thinking if I did message a potential client I’d only do this if I saw that they’d looked at my profile, lived nearby, and had joined in the last month or so. I’d say something like, “Hey, welcome to the site! I saw you lived in my area and just thought I’d say hi!”

  1. Should a pro message a potential client?43 votes
    1. Yeah, sure.
      67.44%
    2. Ew, no.
        9.30%
    3. Sure, but with caveats. (Explain)
      23.26%

Comments

  • I’ve had only three sessions in about two years with pro cuddlers and the main reason is that when I contact them they don’t respond and this seems to be a pretty general problem.
    I have been contacted by several pros over time but of course they are not in my home area so I just say hello, wish them luck and move on.
    I am sure that the pros that contact me (unsolicited) are the ones that take this seriously and as a source of income whether is part time or full time.
    What I gather though is that there is a pretty big number of pros that sign up and just do it thinking they’ll do this whenever they have a chance and when they discover that is not as simple as taking a call, cuddling and collecting them they just give up or are extremely selective as to whom they cuddle.
    To answer the question I don’t mind being contacted by pros but there were threads in the past where more than one guy expressed his dissatisfaction with the practice.

  • @mellow

    Interesting. Thanks for responding. That sucks that most pros don’t respond. Hurts everyone. :(

  • edited May 2018

    @AndiCuddles I know I am speaking from the perspective of some one who doesnt utilize paid cuddle services , but personally I am always happy to be contacted by anybody, it's how I get to know folks. Even some of my closest friends on here are paid cuddlers, and they know I will not be a client but had one of us not reached out to the other we would not become friends. you never really know what direction life may take you so the more people who contact me the better ?

  • edited May 2018

    This topic comes up every so often. See this post here for example: https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/forum/discussion/2183/pros-contacting-non-pros-first#latest

    I don't mind being contacted by pros --- I've had some good sessions and even gotten a few pen pals that way. However, lots of clients are strongly opposed to being solicited. I've known guys to block pros just for saying hello.

    Between the two extremes of "I never object" and "I don't ever want an unsolicited communication from a pro" is a broad middle ground where the reaction depends on the message. Commenting on a profile or a forum post comes off differently than "Want to set something up?" It's the age old problem how of to approach a potential cuddle buddy, but the usual roles are reversed; the pro is approaching the client, and a cut-to-the-chase message can fall flat.

    What many new members don't know about CC is that it began as a community composed entirely of enthusiasts. No pros allowed (although some invariable got in). Paid cuddlers sanctioned with the Pro tag were added later, a development that I think is very positive. But a certain segment of the membership continues to harbor antipathy to pros, and equates receiving any message from a pro with having their dinner interrupted by a telemarketer. So if you initiate communication, you'll get reactions ranging from "thank you" to "how dare you!"

  • Thank you all for the feedback, including the older thread!

    I think I’ll give it a friendly try. No hard sell or anything. :)

  • @AndiCuddles Good luck and you are correct it never hurts!! When I first joined the site a yr and half ago a paid cuddler messaged me out of the blue to say hello and that she appreciated my presence in the forums. I now consider her to be a best friend, like family, and we talk daily and do things with and for each other all the time. So even if you don't get a client from the interaction you may still make a friend from it.

  • [Deleted User]EastsideCuddles (deleted user)

    I have two accounts for science. And on my non pro account I got messages from pros as soon as I would visit their profile. And I thought it was tacky / unprofessional.

    However, that's probably due to the type of message they had sent - me me pick me, I'm better than those other pros (paraphrasing).

    I have messaged people first as a professional cuddler as well, either because they had a cool profile and I wanted to give them props, or because I saw that they could benefit from cuddle parties in their area.

    Most people don't reply, so I figured that messaging first as a professional cuddler is not well received.

    If it's worked out for others though that's a wonderful tool!

  • [Deleted User]OzVisitor (deleted user)

    I think it is terrific when professionals reach out. It shows their interest and openness. It is marketing and business development, even, though it should be phrased in a friendly and helpful way.

    I always think it a bit sad when I set myself to an area I am going to be visiting and notice there are professionals in the area and none of them make contact.

  • I am fine with pros reaching out to me. Most of the ones who have don’t even mention a session. I’m sorry to hear pros aren’t responding to some people. They have all been pretty polite in my experience.

  • As someone that only signed up only a couple of days ago, and is very nervous/anxious about trying this out, I think that if a pro reached out to me correctly, it might be helpful. I won't lie, my first thought when I saw that people were charging/spending $80/hour was yeah right, I would never do that. However I am coming into this as something of a broken person looking for a way to get better and being, as I said, very nervous and anxious about experiencing this and possibly doing something unintentionally wrong or out of protocol, so I can definitely see how having my first few sessions with a pro would be beneficial as they would be able to show me the ropes and likely be more understanding of any faux pas on my part. Whether I can convince my wallet of this, I am still unsure. As for a pro contacting me, if it was in friendly, just "wanting to get to know you" kind of way and seeing how I am doing I would welcome that. If their message to me was basically an advert, I would probably just block them. Hoping the point of view of a newbie was helpful.

  • @mduncan50 Definitely appreciate your point of view =) I can't imagine messaging people with the sole message being an advertisement. It doesn't seem like that would be very productive =P

    Anyway, that is one great purpose to professional sessions. Learning about taking care of yourself and consent, building self-confidence and loving who you are, gaining confidence and comfort, etc. All in a safe space with someone you know isn't going to judge you and is going to help you with this growth. It can really make a difference in all your other relationships. It doesn't have to be an ongoing expense (that is nice, but somewhat of a luxury for many). If you have a specific goal like that, then discuss with the professional and you can stop when either you don't feel like it's helping anymore or if you feel like your goals have been met =)

  • I message people if they've viewed my page a couple of times or if I see something on their profile I especially like ;)

  • I've had zero responses from pros or non-pros to introductory messages I've sent out. However, I've had pros message me solely on the basis that I viewed their profile. I don't really feel that's sufficient reason to message me. I view many profiles for many reasons, it doesn't mean I have any interest. I'd be more receptive if they messaged me because of something I said on a forum or because they liked something in my profile.

  • edited June 2018

    Wow, pros not responding? I'm so sorry to hear that! I figured if there's something that stands out about an enthusiast's profile or forum discussion, why not mention it to them?

  • @stellarosass - most local pros or non-pros never post to the forums, so there is usually little for me to comment on when messaging them. Usually, I chose based on proximity, that they can host (very few do) and for pros, they are within my price range. Even though I live in a huge metropolitan area that leaves few candidates. When I first joined I sent out about 20 messages, over a couple of weeks, to pros and non-pros. None of the people I messaged had anything in their profile to exclude me. I did not get a single reply. Still haven't after four months. There was nothing off-putting in the messages, I simply introduced myself and expressed an interest in getting to know them.

  • edited June 2018

    @UKGuy that's so discouraging. especially from pros because that just goes to show that they don't take the profession seriously. :s probably they are in it for the wrong reasons.

  • That's a great question and one I've been wanting to ask myself. As a noob I've gotten two potential clients' messages, one just stopped responding. So would it be better to occasionally reach out to potential clients? I've had quite a few people visit my profile since i signed up a few days ago but no messages from most. To wait or not to wait...

  • @EleksisSJ If you're reaching out to potential clients to simply introduce yourself and get a feel for the community and get to know them, then I think there's no problem with that. If you're looking to make sales pitches though, I think that would be off-putting to most.

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