@JoyfulHeart
Forgiveness can be given with or without an apology, and forgiveness also does not mean that the offended person is required to extend trust to the offender at any time in the future. I see authentic apology as being connected to future trust, rather than to forgiveness.
Very well said! 🎯
Find it interesting how differently words are used to apologise across the world. In Nigeria culture, the word "sorry" is also used as a way of empathising with someone.
In England, some people say "sorry" interchangeably with "excuse me".
In Yoruba language, the word **Pele ** can be used to express an apology, to say feel better, to console or even to make jest, depending on the context.
Apologies are the energy path used in attempts to regain trust and show remorse.
Sadly, wording, syntax, and effort reviewed by the side that was wronged can confuse the power dynamic and turn an apology gesture into an ethics battle with the relationship as the prize.
Apologies will eventually be reserved to family and those that participate in one sided power settings, where apologies are the expected penalty, only to be squashed by what's left in a valueless social exchange.
Is there really a way to touch someones mind? To help a hurt, angry, fed up spirit see the other side?
I believe we fall into two camps, one side that always apologizes, always forgives - and one side that never apologizes and never forgives. When was the last time we apologized to someone? When was the last time that we forgave someone?
Could the solution be empathy?
What would I do in another person's shoes? This is a question that is almost never asked because It would open the door to...what if I'm wrong?
Empathy, is an underrated super power that requires an old set of discarded tools, kindness, humility, self reflection, love.
An apology is just telling them that you hear them first and foremost then it follows up with I will not make you feel that way again
One of my pet peas for an apology is someone saying. I'm sorry you feel that way period they're acknowledging that I am upset. But they are not acknowledging that they have wronged me. I do not believe that these are true apologies.
@craM VERY true. I've found "I'm sorry you feel that way" often is followed with a dismissal along the lines of, "your feelings are your own." Like @CuddleDuncan said, "All of these [very common] examples are weasel words. Apologies are either wholly meant, or a deliberate insult."
@craM did you just say pet peas lol
@CharlieBear Eh I pretty much flagged myself with that one 😂