I just think that if you don't want to talk to someone, just say that. Practice setting boundaries. Just my opinion
I always answer appropriate messages but I know that many people consider ghosting as a way of establishing a boundary. To avoid frustration, I recommend having realistic expectations when dealing with strangers.
Yes, being ghosted and blocked may seem a bit off-track,
But it just means that someone upstairs, probably has your back.
What would you consider ghosting?
Someone just not responding? Someone you’ve talked to online and then they haven’t responded in a while? Or having a scheduled session, and no call no show?
I’ve heard a lot of folks use ghosting for not getting a response. To me ghosting is having a developed relationship - and this person disappears without a trace and refuses to communicate.
"I just think that if you don't want to talk to someone, just say that"
Not to state the obvious but if you don't want to talk to someone you would'nt say anything.
It seems that is what's happening.
I agree with @NikkiFM. Don’t confuse ghosting with ignoring. Ghosting requires a dialog then silence.
I don’t ghost telemarketers and scammers, I just don’t answer the phone.
I do consider not receiving a reply as rude, but I’ve also decided to ignore it because it’s likely the lesser evil. When I’ve been direct with people, even if I’m trying to be kind, it usually provokes a confrontation. No one likes to feel rejected. They want to know why and argue. How many people tried the non-ghost route then regretted it because it blew up in their face? It’s more understandable behavior in that context.
And it’s been said before but bears repeating; you can’t control others, and getting worked up about it doesn’t make sense. It only harms you. Let it go.
If someone wants to break contact, or never engage in the first place, it’s their choice.
If they don’t respond they just have bad taste. I mean if it bothers you that much, then look at it as their problem.
Based on your question i think i need more information. It sounds like someone just chooses not to engage with you for whatever reason. I wouldn't consider that ghosting, I'd consider that a boundary being set. Maybe something your conversation is being lost in translation and they are choosing not to engage. I must say i rarely find myself in a situation where i just stop talking without indicating why but i can see where it may happen. I have had conversations end abruptly but i can usually tell why, it's something i said or asked. Those people end up being banned shortly after. So if it's happening like that i wouldn't worry, i bet they are banned before you respond to this thread.
Ghosting is abruptly breaking off communication after having an established relationship.
Say you were in a 10-year relationship and you suddenly fell out of love with your partner. So now it's ok to end the relationship by ghosting your partner, because you want to avoid a confrontation? If you think that's in any way acceptable, you should never be in a relationship in the first place.
The same principle applies to cuddle partners that would normally apply to romantic partners. If you end a relationship by ghosting, because you want to avoid a confrontation, you're just a coward. No, it's not kinder to simply disappear from someone's life because you don't want to hurt their feelings with the truth. The truth is kinder even if it hurts at first.
This is what a society that values niceness and politeness over integrity has led to. People pleasing behavior, and the desire to avoid confrontation leads to the widespread acceptance of ghosting.
Being nice is not the same thing as being kind, and in some cases is the exact opposite.
I have spoken to women on here who have said they ghost to avoid "engage and enrage" - people getting angry, even threatening, when rejected. And it's something the Internet makes easy. Is it kind? No. Is it courteous? No. But I'm not going to hector someone who has dealt with rejection rage that they have to be kind to strangers on the Internet.
@WriterGF that’s a great way to put it. Same basic concern I had.
Yes, 487 threads of same topic matter agrees
What @WriterGF has to say is really on point. If someone frightens me, I'm not going to engage with them. Anger issues, signs of possessiveness or boundary-pushing, or any other similar red flag behaviors will lead to a block from me. This is for my safety and to preserve my peace.
Because I'm providing a service, I feel a greater degree of responsibility to respond to everyone. If I were an enthusiast, overwhelmed with messages, I might drop off communication more easily.
I think it's a topic that will never stop being posted about. Rejection, perceived or otherwise, stings. But there are plenty of other cuddlefish in the sea. 🐟
However, if you experience it regularly, you may want to stop and consider the common denominator ❤️
I modified the poll since it had one of the answers as the question, so the 6 votes logged have been reset. And yes this question is asked many times..
Also if someone gets a message, there is no obligation to respond to each and every one, so ignoring those would not be considered ghosting. If they do respond and suddenly stop talking, sure. Though if there was any non-platonic messages sent, they are absolutely not required to entertain responding to those and hopefully instead simply report the person.
If anyone thinks someone is obligated to respond to your first message, you are very fortunate to have not had to wade through the inappropriate messages and sexual propositions (and d*** pics) many members on here have had to endure. Blame other creeps for ruining it for you, not the person that chooses not to engage.
Companies are ghosting job candidates after multiple interviews instead of simply sending a rejection. It's not something that's unique to CC or anyplace else on the web. It's commonplace.
I just think that if you don't want to talk to someone, just say that.
Yes exactly. I'm sure saying that to anyone here will simply end the conversation. there will be no follow up questions such as "why not? "or "what did I say wrong?" and there won't be any name calling. everyone will either respond saying: "thank you for letting me know you are not interested. this is much appreciated" or will enjoy the rejection quietly and peacefully.
@Sooson That’s how I would respond, but I def know that is not common from the reports that come in after someone becomes super creepy after being told that.
But if a question is asked that has already been answered, you're not ghosting if you don't respond, just not repeating yourself.
Ghosting does exist here! It's crazy the amount.. but it exists everywhere. I definitely have had my fair share.. but..I move on. It's all you can do!
@MountainCuddles I agree 100%
Just because I don't feel like talking with someone, doesn't mean it's a forever thing. As someone who can go weeks, months or even years btwn conversations and not be offended, I am exhausted by people who think everything deserves a response and "closure." Conversations can die out naturally. People move on.
@starrynitecuds That is the way I see it also.
As I said before, I politely tell them to find a different cuddle busdy
Buddy
Tis spooky season
Sometimes I just don't want to engage right now. I might change my mind later.🤷🏾♀️. I just stick a pin in it. It might stay stuck, it might not.
On here especially, I have found that I have ghosted someone completely by mistake. This has happened quite a bit as well. It’s because the messages do not update until you refresh the page, so I will have sent a message and not seen a response when I didn’t realize they sent a message while I was typing.
Just imagine how much different it would be if messages updated in real time, you could see when they were typing, and read receipts were built in. Some would love it and some would absolutely hate it 😅
@CharlieBear Ah so that's your big excuse for not returning my calls anymore . Figures ....
@pmvines Hahaha, if anyone manages to get ahold of me via phone, my multiple spam filters have failed me. Not even my mom can get in touch with me without texting first 😅
I think the OP has ghosted this thread 🤣