Am i the only one out there who feels like hes not wanted or needed most nights at home? I work about 70 hours a week, do most of the house work, most of the laundry. I just want to feel needed and or wanted and appreciated. Rant over.
What a nice short rant. I've been trying not to rant anywhere and I had to get a bigger anti-depressant, lol. And I definitely know how you feel. Hopefully some members with wiser and better words will chime in for you
It can be tough when you don't have someone to feel appreciated by or validate you after a long day
My wife has been mentally disabled for over 16 years. I'm here sole caregiver. I do everything inside and out of our home. Do I need to feel needed? No. I know I am, and that's enough.
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Well stated @CuddleBuddy206 .
Pretty sure this is like 95% of adults in committed relationships. Most likely the other party in question feels the same way. No really. It happens.
@niceguy1319 I sympathize. That type of dynamic was the last straw in my last major relationship.
Hugs to the OP and all of those who are feeling the same way. I have been there but sought help and found out ways to get what I needed.
Yes. I just want to be useful. I want to be helpful and yes i want to feel needed.
Sending virtual hugs to everyone 🫂🫂🫂
Your people most likely appreciate you, they just don't express it. I left the caregiver dynamic and now I know they appreciated me because they tell me now I'm not around.
I like caring for people actually, but it won't be one sided anymore. I need to be needed, though
For me, I am just hoping to be want-able. I'm always afraid that the next thing I say or do will be enough to prove that I am not ... (knowledge-wise I know it probably isn't true ... but it is hard not to find myself there anyway)
A lot of assumptions going on in this thread. OP's profile says he's single.
@niceguy1319 Who do you want to feel wanted, needed, and appreciated by? Your child? Family who does not live with you? Friends? Boss? Just trying to understand where you're coming from. I'm sorry you are working so much, both in and out of the home.
~ Sunset Snuggles
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@SunsetSnuggles does it matter? Maybe the answer to all of your questions is yes. Child, family who doesn't live with him, friends or boss. Specifics weren't given so why are they needed? I didn't give specifics because there isn't a specific person or type of person. The feeling can be filled by anyone or any thing. A pet, a community, a stranger a group or organization just to name a few.
I feel that way all the time.
@ReltvlyCanshes It doesn't "matter" insofar as we can still commiserate and express compassion without understanding. But it does matter as we can provide better support with better understanding.
Some responses seemed to assume the OP was referring to an unappreciative spouse, which is why I pointed out his profile says single. The comfort or suggestions that might be helpful to him would vary greatly, given more context. But he certainly doesn't need to give us any.
Gotcha
So sad but quite common. Wish I could multiply myself to show yall all less fortunate the attention and affection you all deserve. Sending virtual hugs 🫂 🤗
I made someone feel that way. And now they are gone. I know I miss them more than they miss me or hey they are just better at hiding it. It’s such a good feeling, feeling protected and cared for and then sharing that with someone else.
I am not being snarky or snippy but why doesn't the OP rescue an animal (dog)? A dog that has been rescued will be able to show love / affection and also allow the OP to give out all the affection and love in return. Also, it would be doing a very good deed.
I don't think the OP was looking for advice, i think he wanted to know he wasn't alone in feeling that way. He was sharing his feelings in a forum where many may feel that same way. I think, or would like to think it's not always a direct need or feeling sometimes it's fleeting but it's a feeling people have. I am at least relieved i am not the only one thinking this way. But it's like being lonely some of the time we are. And the feeling of being wanted, needed and appreciated is always good feeling, but sometimes we don't feel it.
Have to agree with @ReltvlyCanshes—the guy wants to feel seen and not alone.
@KnightlyCuddles rescuing a dog is a long-term obligation and much more than just cuddles. There are many factors to consider: allergies, not able to be home enough (working a lot), the expense (vet bills and food) and housing rules (many renters can't have pets), among other responsibilities.
Yes, pets are not an option for everyone (and some people are just not pet lovers, which is okay too). I am fortunate to be able to have cats - if I have to be out for several hours in a day, I get buried under them when I come home (two of the three I got during the pandemic, so they are used to my being home all the time).
The feeling can be filled by anyone or any thing. A pet, a community, a stranger a group or organization just to name a few.
An animal can never replace the affection one receives from another person.
@starrynitecuds All valid points but to be fair ALL of your points about a dog can be applied to a girlfriend/boyfriend/partner etc etc
@KnightlyCuddles rest assured, any gf I have will definitely be house broken and conduct her business in the bathroom like most humans. I refuse to vouch for the dog.