What To Say You Do When People Ask? What if you don't want to tell them you cuddle??

edited June 2018 in Pro Cuddling

Hello!

What do you tell people you do when they ask about the extra money you've been making when it's likely those people will judge you for cuddling? Do you tell the truth? What happens when they don't take you seriously or think you're doing something unsafe or shady or sexual if you do tell the truth?

I'm having a very hard time because my parents and others want to know what I'm doing to make the money I've been making on Cuddle Comfort. My parents are very conservative people and I do not think they would find me doing this to be a very good thing and it would strain our already rocky relationship. They are the kind of people who believe that any intimacy should be reserved for those in a committed relationship. Unfortunately, at this point, before I even began cuddling, my parents assume I'm a prostitute! And I've NEVER done anything like that before...

Edit:
Ok, so I can to talk to my parents about what I do, but I’m afraid since they don’t treat me as an adult because I haven’t been one for sometime due to several medical health issues, including a Brain inflammatory autoimmune disease. I WAS actually very sexually active for a few years, so they assumed I was a prostitute, which isn’t true at all. Now that has happened, I’m not sure if telling them I cuddle on the side is such a good idea. But hey, maybe if I do what scares me, it won’t be so bad!

Thank you!

~Sweetie

Comments

  • I am probably not the best person to ask because as soon as I signed up I told ALL of my close family members... Interestingly, my older sister was the most concerned. My super religious and conservative father thought it was a great idea. My kids (teenagers in Gen Y) were not even the slightest bit phased. My dentist was interested but not judgmental. (Yes, I told my dentist. I don't know. It just came up!)

    It has involved a lot of explaining and educating and 'I AM NOT A PROSTITUTE'-ing. But I haven't gotten any negative feedback to my face. (Aside from people who worry about 'how I'm going to stay safe' i.e. not end up raped and/or murdered. Which is... nice that they're concerned? But frustrating, too.)

    I'm going to DM you, too. :)

  • edited June 2018

    Let’s see , you don’t want your parents to observe you with sums of cash .

    You can cuddle for less money .

    You can cuddle for free .

    Or you can send the money you are making, to me. I will hold it for you . You may direct which investment vehicle you want the money parked , or I will decide .

  • I have not told my family yet. I am in a similar situation as you and am NOT looking forward to coming out to them, but I feel I will need to soon... I am at about 50% of the income I need to be able to pay my bills, and I think I need to make things public to make it more successful. On the other hand, I have been starting to answer honestly when strangers ask me what I do. That has been very interesting and is generally met with positive response, though there are of course the people who really don't get it at all ;-) But it's fun talking to people about my work and explaining to them the intention and value in it =)

  • You run a one on one emotional therapy consultation business.

  • This is not necessarily related to the problem of explaining cuddling as a job as the OP has inquired, however I think a good deal of us don't always find it easy to talk about cuddling in general. I do have a few people I refer to as my cuddle buddies, and it is assumed we are dating or that there is more to it than that. So I can see how it would be difficult to explain that you get paid to cuddle people and not have it be taken as meaning more than that.

  • @cuddlerforu24 lmao, bad boy~, bad~!

    @Dreamy_Sweetie duncan has the right idea. tell them you get paid to listen to people talk to you about their problems or something. eventually you'll be able to gauge their reaction and come clean or ... you know. not at all.

    HOWEVER. if you are dependent on them for most everything though, i can guarantee you, one way or another, they'll find out, and i think it might come better if you are the one that lets them know. so:
    mention the site, in conversation and tell them you're gonna give it a try because "YOU" want to cuddle. and you're telling them because when you "go out" they need to keep an eye out for you. (you know, meeting online strangers, yadda yadda safety stuff) that way, eventually, may be, you can tell them you're a professional now. plus, the added benefit that they are now involved AND keeping an eye out for ya.
    good luck dudette

  • Tell them to mind their own business

  • it's not something I discuss frequently/openly unless it is someone I am already close to. I am just a private person in general so how I make money or spend my time is my business. I am fortunate that my mother, siblings, and close friends are pretty open minded about my cuddling. I talk to them if I need to do a safety check-in or discuss ways I could better assert my boundaries in different situations. I know I am lucky to have the judgement free support that I do.

    I was terrified to talk about it at first, just because I was not sure how to address it and what questions to expect. However, it was a huge relief when I just opened up. I shouldn't have been as surprised as I was since I was raised in an open minded household and have in turned surrounded myself with friends of similar mindsets. I am not doing anything wrong giving/receiving platonic cuddles and with that my family/friends trust my judgement that I am doing something that is positive.

  • I am most comfortable telling strangers what I do (once I started, it's easy now). I love talking to strangers, one of the many reasons this work is perfect for me. And I feel you never know where you'll find your next client, someone who needs cuddles. It's hard to be a successful business without telling people what you do. Not impossible, it just adds another roadblock.

  • Cuddling is a form of "biofield therapy" (look it up). I tell people that I'm a hollistic healer and that my clients use my services as a natural alternative to taking medication for things like depression, anxiety, social disorders, and numerous other things.

  • Strangers as well as friends, I freely tell... family, coming from a different culture than from where I was raised in, I usually express that i'm a holistic healer but that's mainly because i don't just cuddle, but also help folks in other ways to heal such as energy cleansing and i am still expanding on my abilities and looking into more training.

  • I tell them I’m a porn star

  • "Therapeutic companionship."

    "Platonic touch therapy."

    "Lonely people want someone to hang out with who is safe and won't judge them. I get paid to hang out with them for an hour or so. We talk, we hug, we chill. It's good money, I meet interesting new people, and it makes us both happy."

    One of the people I cuddled with was disabled. He has bad scarring all over his body, an awkward gait when he walks, and is very shy because he was bullied in school. If I mention things like "some people have a hard time meeting others / feeling accepted because of things like disabilities, and I get paid to spend time with them as a friend to help build their confidence and make them feel better" folks seem to take it fine.

  • Any idea how we keep people from being able to google our username and having our pics and profiles come up on regular search engines? I was under the impression the only place that comes up is when our user names are searched is internally. Recently a friend of mine pointed out my cuddle profile comes up on google. This I am displeased about and have changed settings which didn't help. And emailed but got no response yet. C

  • I have always been a little unconventional as a person and I am definitely always myself around my family and friends....within reason of course.

    I told them what I do is work with others in finding balance in their life through platonic touch and genuine connection with no expectations of anything but a break from their days for some relaxation and grounding of self. Just like you would for a massage therapist to come in your home, except I am here to cuddle and connect in a different way.

    The MT example has been helpful for me explaining to friends/family the concept of this being a business.

    typical explanation from me to person curious lol.....

    "Just like a massage therapist will do at home calls for some clients, that is essentially what my job is for people and what I do is provide a therapeutic experience that leaves us both hopefully feeling much more relaxed and balanced in a healthy and platonic way. How GREAT is that? ...."

    95% of the time, it works in the logically understanding that what I do is a holistic service, not some cheap trick or game. the other 5% I tend to leave them alone with their thoughts, we can't win them all ;)

  • Theraputic Mobile Massage

  • Just that i am hanging out with my friends nobodys business really. Some peiple know i like to have a cuddle buddy just begs clarification that i literally mean cuddle buddy and not code for something else. If its a fwb i will say fwb so if i say cuddle pal then i mean cuddle pal

  • [Deleted User]chococuddles (deleted user)

    I'm Robin Hood.

    (but I keep 10%)

  • Most of my clients right now are from telling people what I do. I decided I couldn't expect myself to be successful if it was a secret. You have to do it when it feels right for you, but I absolutely love being "out". Lots of great conversations, and I get to help educate people about this work and how important it is :-)

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