I’m, the OP of the, since deleted, Why Men Should Cuddle Other Men thread. Let me begin by clarifying that the timeout I received, based on false accusations of name-calling, has been reversed. Yay. 😁
This decision was a mistake, and I am glad that it was promptly rectified. Im back , fresh from a delicious Christmas dinner with my fam, filled with gratitude for those who extended their support at my brief absence.Ty to those of you who can disagree respectfully and engage with courage rather than fragility, I extend my deepest holiday gratitude. 🎄🥰
That said, I gotta address an important issue. It’s become apparent that some among us wield the flagging system not as a tool of just accountability, but as an instrument of suppression—silencing voices that they disagree w, rather than those violating any rules. The flag button is not a downvote button!
Let’s be real: Why Men Should Cuddle Other Men might have been an uncomfortable topic for some, but discomfort isn’t the same as a rule violation. This misuse of the flagging system not only stifles meaningful conversations but also discourages people who only wish to spark dialogue .
I don’t blame the mods, who I believe acted in good faith; I blame the people who are misusing the flags. But we gotta call for greater fairness in addressing such flags, for when we allow tools of accountability to be weaponized by the few, we risk silencing the entire community.
Thoughtful and lawful discourse should never be punished simply because it makes some uneasy; and I say that as a naturalized American who was born in a country that doesn’t even allow a fragment of the freedom of speech found in the west.
Ironically, as another cuddler pointed out in the thread, some of us were able to exchange cute memes and have lighthearted convos despite not agreeing. It’s a shame when unnecessary escalations overshadow moments of dope dialogue and mutual respect.
Moving forward I hope we will all meet discomfort with curiosity, disagreement with dialogue, and fragility with strength. These are the kinds of convos that make this platform worthwhile, and I’m grateful for those who engage constructively.
Edit for punctuation
@brownglucose - That's strange. I wonder how false accusations happen since the mods can see all messages sent included private messages if reported.
@Mike403 will DM you more info if you’d like. I’d rather not post any mod corespondents publicly without permission
Thoughtful and lawful discourse should never be punished simply because it makes some uneasy
In a public setting, I would agree completely with you. But on a private website, even one open to the public, the owner(s) get to decide what speech to allow. I may not agree with some of the editorial decisions on this site (ok, I do not agree with some), but it IS privately owned, so free speech rights & laws for you & I (and others on here) simply don't apply.
@Jubal in my post, I’m not referring to the owners or mods taking issue w a post. In my post referring to cuddlers,like you and I, , flagging a post because it makes them uneasy. Again, There are no forum rules that encourage users to flag posts because they simply disagree.
The "First Amendment" of the US Constitution does NOT apply here. PERIOD. This is UK owned and registered Web site. 😆😆😆
@brownglucose Glad to see you are back.
Oh, absolutely. The UK is clearly a draconian dystopia where free speech is entirely unheard of, and the mere concept of a culture that values it is completely alien to those damn Brits. 😂 Spot on. I suppose that was your only takeaway after skimming for 10 seconds. Lol. FYI we’re discussing law of Cuddle comfort.
@WriterGF good to be back c:
Beaver eyelids are transparent so that they can see through them as they swim underwater.
💡🧠💡🧠💡🧠
@gem7
I have noted that on many of the occasions when somebody disagrees with a decision or policy of Moderation, they do so from a position of ignorance. This website is under continuous attack from a number of different directions, and one of the key unspoken Moderating principles is never to allow anything on the forums that, as it stands or if suitably twisted, could give ammunition to those who would do this place harm.
To put it another way: if you disagree with a Moderating decision there is a very high chance that it's based on factors you know nothing about, and if you did know these factors you would appreciate that decision a lot more. From having spent a lot of time here, and taking a serious interest in cuddling matters, I now know what some of these factors are but I certainly don't know them all.
I've refreshed my memory of the Terms of Service - to which we have all voluntarily agreed - and, as you would expect, the relevant parts may be summarised as, "The owners ... can do whatever the hell they want when it comes to Moderating decisions on the forum."
@CuddleDuncan what you are saying may be true i. Terms of the terms of service. In fact it may be true in the fact we don't know all the details. But it's definitely not true disagreeing is coming from a place of ignorance. When i disagree with something that happens here based on moderation it based on the information i have and know. The information i know informs the disagreement, and there have been many instances that the mods have made decisions that i am sure were wrong and any of the supporting information makes no difference to me. Especially when it comes to the stifling of conversations and the censorship of ideas. Nonetheless they can do what they do and i can fully disagree. I've come to accept that politics and religion are subjects most people agree shouldn't be discussed, i don't, but whatever. But the contentiousness not the topic is what should be addressed in other circumstances. It's those that for whatever reason find reasons to fight, those that go back and forth, name call and insult. It's those that get emotionally charged and act out should be addressed. But that's my opinion, fully informed opinion and i ain't in charge so it is what it is.
Just to be clear since I started this thread, I am not attacking the mods,or anyone. I even went so far as to say I feel for them. They are in a tough position.
I do adamantly advocate for taking action against offenders rather than locking or deleting threads.
I lock threads that go off the rails so they don’t dominate the top of the forum on everyone’s home page. They are usually many pages long of the same people going back and forth. It’s not a welcoming sight. Sinking a thread is a softer option. I personally only hide threads in extreme circumstances.
As for a distribution of workload, we have mods that focus only on reports. The forums have zero impact on them handling those reports. This notion that moderating forums is detracting from that is simply not a thing. I do bounce between both when I can mentally handle it, but one isn’t detracting from the other. They may both be driving me insane but for separate reasons.
@brownglucose we have never corresponded and although I have seen your post Ive Honestly never addressed anything you have written simply because I can tell your in a spot where I was once with sincere curiosity.
At this point I have learned and stated my views on bias within the thread button pushers.
Now I only respond with videos lol. Although in this case I am using words to say Do not take the folks on here stuck in the 50's to heart. There is still much work to do on here to have true empathy and equality on this site.
Your opinion is valued, as most others are also valued. While those that can game the system will continue to wield their power in pursuit of Making CC great again..tongueincheek...
Now back to the videos Remember the only judgement that matters is the judement you have on yourself daily....
Maybe you have a point about music video reactions
Everyday