Anyone here find themselves catching feelings for someone they're cuddling with? I feel like feelings would only grow if the cuddling continues. Would it be best to stop cuddling with that person?
Related to connections from this site, yes, in my mind it's best to stop because there are clear boundaries in place to prevent anything that isn't platonic.
It's natural for close physical contact to bring up lots of different feelings/emotions but it's important to recognize what context you're in while that's occurring.
It would probably be best to stop cuddling really and honestly. I do think that cuddling can often lead to attachment, so there should be some boundries. That being said, I have yet to cuddle with anyone here, so I'm not sure if I myself would catch feelings or not.
There's a thread about that.....
https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/forum/discussion/comment/307532#Comment_307532
So when you are hugging people and touching and focus is on you etc... oxytocin is released. It's a bonding hormone. If you aren't able to separate the fact that what you are experiencing purely biological, find someone else. No reason to put yourself through that. It happens in therapy too.
Anyone here find themselves catching feelings for someone they're cuddling with?
Any feelings that I "catch" with another cuddler, are platonic feelings and nothing more. 😁🫂
Just say no to feelings and erections.
@Auroradream
That sounds like there is an erection dealer on a street corner saying “Come on all the cool people are sporting one.”
The high majority of my experience here on the platform have been pretty incredible, so I feel ya on this one my friend, I do. But the key is *** compartmentalization ***.
Try to look at the experience for everything that it IZZZZZZ, and not what it isn’t, or what you would like it to be.
And go back and re-read @amcuddles608 comment he said it PERFECTLY in his 2nd paragraph.
The most challenging aspect for me is when the session ends and she leaves. I hate that part! So much to the point that I wrote the following rhyme about it. (I’ve posted this before so apologies to the forum regulars that have already sat through my cheesy poetic goopity goop…
But I too have to practice what I preach.
Yes it’s normal to catch feelings especially if the person has other admirable qualities. If you are getting too attached I would say it’s ok to let them know how your feeling and find another cuddle buddy. The site is to help bring better mental health you do t want to feel like you are breaking up when you don’t have that specific cuddle buddy.
The phrase "catching feelings" makes it sound like an uncontrollable force or even a condition you need to avoid, but feelings are a natural part of human connection. The key isn't necessarily to stop cuddling but to recognize that emotions can exist while maintaining an appropriate dynamic, whether that’s companionship, friendship, or something else. In some cases, those feelings can evolve into deep, lasting friendships or even stronger cuddle partnerships, as long as everyone involved is clear about expectations and boundaries. If navigating that feels difficult, it might be worth exploring ways to become more comfortable with emotional awareness and communication. It can really enrich your life.
@PeopleLikeUs - love the maturity of what you are expressing.
Just remind yourself what this site is for. Use it for that only or pause this site to seek something else elsewhere. Separation like that is what works best with everything.
I will stand on my usual soap box and say... honesty? Why is that never an option? Someone can say how they feel and then the other person goes.
@Janelle19 not everyone can handle honesty.
For example I once had a cuddler who I was cuddling with for a second time and we had a third session lined up already. He said he was attracted to me then and if I was looking for a boyfriend or if I used dating sites too. I told him I do not use dating sites and am not looking for a boyfriend and that is why I am on this site. We finished our session well as always but later he said he can't continue having more sessions because of our talk. I accepted his honestly about the attraction thing and was able to not let it interfere with our future cuddle sessions. He could not accept my honest answer though to continue. So if people are willing to use the honest approach then all of them need to accept it back too but not all do. That is the problem that irritates me.
@Amortentia I had a guy on a site I won't say. First we met for a light lunch and he paid. We had one cuddle, then maybe a month and a half later he asked to meet for lunch. Somewhere between the cuddle and the next lunch he asked if I was opposed to dating, being naive I said I was open to it. Then another month or more of ghosting. And he popped up and scheduled a cuddle. We had a nice cuddle but he didn't think he needed to pay and was visibly upset. Now in his mind he assumed that we were probably dating and was mad that he didn't get what he wanted which was free cuddles. In my mind ghosting for month no hospital visits ect. Isn't dating. Eventually like a week later he sent me 20 thru cash app and we haven't spoken. He could have just been honest with what he meant by dating free cuddles with zero effort ob his part. Maybe we could have worked out a discount lol
He could have just said my definition of dating is never actually talking to you and coming to get free cuddles because that's how much respect I have for you. Now very colorful Virgo type attacks on his character and more may have happened. But that's honesty
I’ve never met someone that wanted honesty.
All you have to do in our culture to get someone to lie to you is to talk to them. Start with, “How are you?”, and the lies begin.
Our entire culture is founded on lies, glorifies and rewards lying, and treats honesty as some sort of embarrassing naïveté, or unnecessary cruelty.
People don’t want the truth.
This is a great topic
I think this is why some people prefer pros. As long as there is a business/money aspect to it, I think (for some) it helps keep them from thinking in terms of a romantic relationship developing. Enthusiast cuddling always felt too much like dating to me - if A and B are cuddling, and A loves it but B doesn't want to anymore, then feelings get hurt.
I love reading the discussions. Interesting topic. ☺️
Auroradream I like your comment, it just made me laugh. I feel like if there is an emotional connection combined with a physical attraction it can very well happen and as WriterGF pointed out, remind yourself "It's only business"
Anything you do that fosters human connection can lead to attraction and feelings. Tell them if you want, but also be emotionally secure enough to be able to accept the consequences of those feelings not being reciprocal and possibly killing the friendship. And don't be resentful and blame them if that's the case, as nobody should ever try to emotionally blackmail someone into caring about them.
pmvines you are so right, a potential friendship killer for sure
Appreciate all the feedback, stories, and conversation on this topic everyone. This is something very new and my 'feelings' are nowhere near strong enough to warrant any kind of action. Not even quite sure what it is just yet. Really just wanted to see if anyone has experienced it, what they thought about it, and or how they dealt with it. Below is my thoughts...
It’s completely natural for feelings to develop when you’re cuddling with someone, especially if it’s a regular thing. Physical closeness can create emotional intimacy, even if that wasn’t the original intention and in this case, it definitely wasn't. Whether you should stop cuddling depends on the situation. Are the feelings mutual? Do you want something more, or is it better to maintain boundaries? If continuing to cuddle is making things emotionally complicated for you, it might be worth having a conversation with the person to see where you both stand. Whether to move on or not. Otherwise, if it’s bringing you happiness and there’s potential for something more, leaning into those feelings might not be a bad thing. Or it could be. Just depends I guess. Either way, you just gotta be ready to accept whatever comes your way, good or bad. That's life, take it or leave it.
@marc8kb24 Good on you for taking all the feedback into consideration and processing it in a thoughtful manner. Wishing you the best out there!
I really miss George Carlin. He was right about so many things…
Sure it can happen. There were a time or two that happened to me. Noone that I met off this site. I had someone a few years back that we clicked on every level in every way. We both started to get feelings and crossed that line and for some reason after that cuddling wasn’t the same for either of us. I think it turned out to not be the same because we did cross that line even though we had boundaries and knew that we only wanted one another to be a cuddle partner. We were both married. Maybe clicking too much made us cross that line? Were we just FWB? Were one or both of us looking for something more and hoping we can make it work? Was one or both of us feeling guilty for crossing that line? We both know that it would be nothing more than cuddling, because neither of us wanted to end our current situation with our personal lives. I don’t know. I don’t know if I will ever figure out the true answer as to was that the sole reason or whether other reasons played a role in it also. I know when I am looking for someone to just cuddle with that if feelings get involved again I think I’m a strong enough person to discuss it with them and say this is where we got to draw the line in the sand. Either way with that cuddle partner I miss her. We were great on every level like I said, but once we cross that line, it changed.
I think we all catch feelings for the interaction. But love the interaction, not the person. The other person is like-minded as a cuddler, but the beautiful thing you’ve shared is the cuddle, not necessarily each other. What I feel after a cuddle is thankfulness, not desire.
@pmvines Hit em with the wisdom.