How're my fellow PTSD peeps holding up?
Whoever decided the best way to celebrate (especially military & country level victories), was with loud bangs and flashes, was a total moron. 🤦🏼
That’s a very valid point. 😦
Same with the whole 21 gun salute thing, let's get a bunch of people with war trauma together and make the sounds of war...as a way to respect the person who died that way?? Talk about a crappy move 🤷🏼
I really dislike how this is always framed negatively as people being callous to people with PTSD or to dogs. Its 2 days (2 weeks in certain areas) out of 365. Only about 5% of adults in America have PTSD.
So 95% of americans are supposed to not celebrate for 2 days (usually only a few hours) because of 5% vulnerable population? Dog owners and those with PTSD have all year to prepare for the event.
I dont know, it just seems really really .... just disingenuous.
Kinda like asking nobody to eat peanuts in the US because some people have allergies (though at least that one would kill them).
^ This. This, and this.
Im not disregarding the problem, nor am I not empathetic to it. I agonized over the decision to light mine before doing so because I worried about what my neighbors would think, how the dogs and cows would be, if there were people with PTSD nearby, is it safe fire risk wise (I actually waited till it started raining to be sure).
But after all that deliberation, I decided it's just one night of noise, and it's not like I make a habit of disturbing the peace.
And in the end, it was less than 30 minutes, and then everyone went to bed.
I’m honestly used to it. I live near Disney World where they do fireworks 365 days a year and I can hear it from my apartment.
Removes hat
Regarding peanuts, people can eat them without hurting those who are allergic. To make the analogy congruent, it would need to have allergic people being forced to eat peanuts and saying it's ok because it's only one day a year.
Puts hat back on
Don't get me started.... I wish it was only 30 minutes of fireworks! Where I live it's a week of fireworks for hours at a time. From about 8pm to 2am. Not only pyrotechnics but there are idiots who think shooting guns in the air is the way to celebrate. What goes up must come down! I have a broken window because of a stray bullet. I had debris from firecrackers falling on my roof last night. And of course it will continue every night this weekend.
Not only can I not sleep, worried that they're going to set my house on fire! I also have a terrified pup shaking in my arms. I gave him his anxiety med & it took half an hour of holding him & singing to him before he finally fell asleep. To awaken again every time our house shook from one coming too close.
Every holiday our neighborhood turns into a war zone. I can only imagine how military members with PTSD are managing. Not to mention families with babies or toddlers who are suffering too. Needless to say I hate being bombarded by rogue fireworks/bullets!
Nicely done, @JoyfulHeart.
@Runawaycuddles The issue is that no one knew about PTSD when these things became customary. Even a few decades ago it was simply known as "shell shock" and lacked understanding and treatment.
I definitely like to be prepared with earplugs for any place or event with potential loud noises, and I unashamedly plug my ears for things as common as a trash truck banging a dumpster. Loud, unexpected noises send an electric-type shock through my brain.
@tacpmurg Your initial post sounded anything but empathetic. The OP didn't suggest that America should never set off fireworks, in any case...she simply checked in on those with PTSD and gave her opinion that the tradition is tone-deaf. Ironically. 😁
If everyone did it for thirty minutes it would be much less challenging. We live in an area where it is a three+ day event and it literally goes on all night long for two of those days... Midnight, still going, 2:00 A.M., still going, 4:00 A.M., still going. Regardless of PTSD, I feel bad for anyone who has to get up early for work. 😬
🐕 As for my dog, I take him out when it's less loud. I keep him distracted with toys and treats, and play music to try to drown out the sound so he has less anxiety. He still couldn't calm down enough to go to the bathroom last night. Dogs have much more sensitive hearing than we do, and no understanding of why these scary loud noises are happening.
~ Sunset Snuggles
🫂 Enthusiast 🐄 Vegan 🫧 Kid at Heart
@JoyfulHeart if we are being true to analogies here, its more like, the person with the penut allergy is going to board a plane knowing the departure time and duration, and that penuts will be served. At probably inconvenience and cost they could take other measures like board another flight later.. or mitigate the risk the best they can.
@SunsetSnuggles Im sorry its not being interpreted correctly, but I do empathize. While I empathize I acknowledge that just because someone else is uncomfortable does not make it wrong. In a society there is a give and take.
There are some things that are intentionally done for the purpose of making someone uncomfortable or harming them, and there are other things where people are living their lives according to norms and customs and it inadvertently makes someone uncomfortable or caused harm. On the topic of fireworks, I consider it to be somewhere in the middle depending on circumstances and context.
@disneysamurai I'm glad you're used to it, cuz that sounds horrible!! ❤️🩹
@JoyfulHeart Thank you, that was very polite 🙏🏻
@MTex That's so awful!! And I fully agree. If it was something confined to set days or times, and literal bullets weren't involved, which they often are here all over because 'Murica, it would be a hell of a lot easier to manage!
@SunsetSnuggles Oh for sure, officially speaking PTSD wasn't named, and even shellshock was a brand new term during the world wars. My thing is people have been doing war for literally all of human history, and PTSD has always been a part of that, so them acting like it was some new thing simply because they finally slapped a label on it is just so disingenuous. 🤷🏼 Like come on, at least keep it to set times and don't give the public easy access to the big ones 😑
@pmvines Yup! Most of us aren't taught about PTSD or how it works and what causes it, so without that baseline information it's easy to write off people who suffer with it as "just jumpy". But for the military, the most obvious place people acquire PTSD, to be like "Hey, ya know all those people that just came back from war? Let's light off a bunch of things that sound like war! They'll LOVE that!"?? Sadistic numbskullery at best if ya ask me 🤦🏼
@Runawaycuddles
Last week I was in Athens GA visiting some folks from Houston who were in town for a big combat veteran biker event. it was an interesting experience, witnessing their brotherhood through shared experiences. I'm not a veteran, nor a biker for that matter, so it was a learning experience.
Something I've observed about PTSD is that it's not about someone being weak. It's about someone having been strong in ways that many people never have to be. They come to the point in their lives where it becomes harder and harder to continue carrying that.
If honoring them inconveniences me in some small way, I do not feel like I've been asked too much.
I cannot handle fireworks. While pretty, the bangs traumatize me. I put myself into a deep sleep last night before they began.
@pmvines Sounds like a good time!
@JoyfulHeart Exactly. You can literally see the scar tissue in the brains of people with PTSD, trauma quite literally breaks the brain in the same way more obvious injuries break bones, muscle fibers and tendons, so people treating it as some sort of character flaw to need care for those injuries is simply baffling to me. 🤷🏼
@POETIC_TRUTHS I feel this so much 🥲
I haven’t played with fireworks since I was in high school. But if I still did and knew someone with PTSD was a neighbor I’m not sure the ones I use would be triggering. I liked jumping jacks and not firecrackers or M80’s. If they told me it would trigger then I would do my best to accommodate. But with my budget it would last a few minutes tops and not be loud. Not many can afford those loud bright ones as they cost thousands of dollars. Do earplugs help or noise cancelling over the ear headphones to block out the noise for the duration of fireworks?
Heh. I'm one of those combat vets who are apparently a subject of this thread. I'm not trying to be insensitive to folks with PTSD et al in my response here. Lumping all veterans (combat and noncombat) into a category of having war trauma or other ailments is a bit callous and insensitive in and of itself. Good lord, look at all the vets who enjoy going to events like the former Knob Creek machine gun shoot (I personally get a visceral thrill on the rare times that I get to fire off an RPG or other bang toy at such events).
But, even though the majority come through our experiences just fine, there are some who are injured. As pointed out above, such injuries are not always visible to the rest of us. However, we're talking about planned fireworks events a couple times a year - Independence Day and New Years Day - which folks can plan around. In my particular case, it means securing our pets in a dark, enclosed room in the house. In general , the proportion of combat vets with uncontrollable/unmanageable PTSD is vanishly small. Most vets who I know with this problem have difficulties with spontaneous, unexpected things - like a car crash - rather than in dealing with known, expected events, like being at ai airport with all the aircraft noises.
Eh, I'm going to get down off my soapbox now ... may chime in again later.
I just think of all the kids in active war zones who have been hearing these noises their entire life - except it's not pretty fireworks, it's guns and bombs. It must be so scary, or like all the kids who have been affected by school shootings, it's not just veterans these days - so many more are impacted by gun violence and trauma.
My dad who served two tours in Special Forces in Vietnam had severe PTSD and had to have his back to a wall at all times. On July 4th he would take his boat and his buddies from the VA support group out on the Atlantic Ocean. As he said, “It’s the same as being extremely outnumbered in war time. If you know it’s coming, you run and reassess.”
I think everyone on all sides has to navigate this. If you have PTSD, talk to your neighbors and ask what their plans are. Perhaps you might want to go out in the country for a couple of hours. Not saying there are solutions for everyone, but it doesn’t hurt to attempt mitigation.
My two uncles are veteran Marines. One served in Vietnam. He still has shrapnel in his body from combat. They are both strong men & I respect them very much! They haven't disclosed if they have PTSD but I know they both have painful memories. My heart goes out to all affected by war, military & civilian.
Out of an inability to not go down a rabbit hole I started googling. It apparently goes all the way back to 1777.
Yesterday the 4th of July, being the anniversary of the Independence of the United States of America, was celebrated in this city with demonstrations of joy and festivity. About noon all the armed ships and gallies in the river were drawn up before the city, dressed in the gayest manner, with the colors of the United States and streamers displayed. At one o’clock, the yards being properly manned, they began the celebration of the day by a discharge of thirteen cannon from each of the ships, and one from each of the thirteen gallies, in honor of the Thirteen United States … The evening was closed with the ringing of bells, and at night there was a grand exhibition of fireworks (which began and concluded with thirteen rockets) on the Commons, and the city was beautifully illuminated.
@Jubal Thank you for the point that you are making. I can appreciate the truth of the fact that some who served did escape without profound injury, either physical or neurological.
This is a reminder to me not to paint with broad brushes, and that kindness often means having a conversation to find out what my neighbors do or do not need.
@tacpmurg Thanks for sharing that. It's interesting to see how far back the tradition goes.
I think that sometimes we project our own traumas onto others, expecting that it's the same for everyone as it is for us. That is part of being an empathetic human and can be hard to avoid at times. The flip side to that is that you can over empathize, and get so immersed in someone else's trauma that you end up embodying it as your own . We search for familiarity and belonging through shared experiences. It's easy to forget that not everyone's truth is the same, and not everyone is built the same way.
@pmvines Well said.
@Runawaycuddles you don't have to have been through anything to have it bother you tremendously. Night one I sat out in the garage with the dog and cat that obviously hear it and assume something is wrong. It sets their fight or flight on edge... I can only imagine what it does to all the natural flora and fauna. I've thought many times while sitting and watching about the line from our anthem about the rockets red glare and bombs bursting in air.... I don't see it as a celebration. I do see it the way some others have mentioned, how other countries have to deal... The sound of gun fire and bombs going off and trying to rest and feel safe. Many places in the world have to deal with this. We may have to deal with this at some point. So, the fear PTSD and horror that can come with it... I think are appropriate... That's what us NOT having war on our soil costs unfortunately. I want to thank you for what you did and what it cost you. I would gladly scrap the 4th... Too dangerous and just not a fan... But I can see a symbolic why to the whole thing... 🤷🏼♀️
@pmvines Based on this comment section I seriously doubt anyone is over empathizing 😂🤣🤦🏼
@ladybug7 I actually have a theory that the dogs and cats that do react that strongly to fireworks probably have PTSD as well, since not all of them are bothered by them, buuuuut that's a whole different conversation 🤷🏼😂
That was more a general statement and not an observation. Agree.