um, Facebook just outed 2 of y'all to me 😳

89cadillac89cadillac
edited November 2025 in General

Today, I noticed 2 persons I cuddled with (over a year ago) pop up on my 'Facebook People You May Know' section. 😭 I was not Facebook friends with either, yet, previously. But, now, today, I can see y'all real names.

Hmmm, I did already have their contact cell phone numbers, but that's it--so maybe that's why they now suddenly popped up as 'people you may know' to me?

This is kinda scary tho. Definitely, y'all, don't use your social media pictures everywhere online.

Comments

  • AlyLaurenAlyLauren

    The phone numbers definitely connect because I frequently add someone to my phone and then get their socials in my suggestions.

    This is really only a problem if for some reason, cuddling needs to be a secret. Obviously everyone can choose what they want to share, but I guess if you need/want to keep your involvement on CC private, don't share your cell number. 🤷‍♀️

    Everyone in my life knows I am a professional cuddler so I don't care. I absolutely post the same selfies on my IG and FB that I have here. But I do let clients know that I am not connecting on socials or other apps because I keep things strictly professional and don't want to confuse any boundaries.

  • Big_Green_23Big_Green_23

    Yes, having someone’s Phone # is enough for nosy Facebook to show them to you as “People you may Know” & vice versa. It can be funny but also annoying. 😅

    I got a haircut while on vacation in Vegas once. The barber asked me to save his number, hoping to make me a regular customer. I never actually texted him, yet he still pops up occasionally. 🤷🏾

  • great_pillow08great_pillow08

    Don't list your phone number on social media profiles or give them access to your contacts list, and you'll be safe!

  • cuddlefaerycuddlefaery
    edited November 2025

    If you have the Facebook app on your phone (or IG, Whatsapp, or any other Meta-owned app), it will scrub for contacts and data even if you remove your phone number from your social media accounts. The only way to prevent Meta from outing you like this is to remove all their apps from your phone AND not have any linked emails or phone numbers.

    Google got slammed for this years ago, but "somehow" Meta keeps skating by... 🙄🤦🏻‍♀️

  • Carrie_AnneCarrie_Anne

    Fun story…. When I first started cuddling, there was a guy I met with a few times.
    His profile showed he was single, we never really talked about it except he said at one point he was dating someone. No problem to me at that time but I did think it was a little weird that he wanted to cuddle someone else.
    Well pretty quickly he showed up as a Facebook friend suggestion and his FB profile pic was he and his wife. lol wedding pics from many years ago.
    Pretty sure his wife had no idea he was active on a cuddle site. I was surprised he was using his personal number instead of Google Voice. But it seems

  • ecuddlebliss21ecuddlebliss21
    edited November 2025

    (" 'Facebook People You May Know' section." AND " If you have the Facebook app on your phone (or IG, Whatsapp, or any other Meta-owned app), it will scrub for contacts and data...")

    Very interesting. Decades ago, I have had similar experiences using 'Linkedin' too. Even if the individuals had never served the same businesses as I had.
    We never had exchanged e-address and private telephone numbers. Neither had I owned a cellular. Other then those few have had viewed my Linkedin profile.

    Of course, the past year I suspect Google's Chrome browser app has been scrubbing for contacts and data through various email products over the years all along too. Despite that I avoided every 'Address Book' apps for security reasons.
    I was planning to dump Chrome for IE, or another browser soon. (Never 'DuckDuckGo').

  • MrPaulMrPaul

    I don’t have the Facebook app on my phone, I just go to the website. However, I did load Messenger and that scrubs your contacts and makes friend suggestions based on phone numbers. I generally deny access to my contacts for most apps. Proximity will also do it. The apps know who you have been near.

    Phone apps also listen to you all the time, that’s one reason why you get ads for stuff you only talked about but didn’t search for yet. It’s not a coincidence.

    I don’t have an issue with being Facebook friends with some of my cuddle partners, so not a problem for me. It’s something to be aware of if you are concerned about privacy though.

  • TxTomTxTom

    A while back, I didn't have any apps on my phone. I suspect because it was a rotary dial.

    Nevertheless, once a year, a large paperback book containing my personal info was delivered to the driveway of every single house. The entire damn town knew my name, street address, and phone number!

    Cross reference that with my hellish school yearbook photo---well, I don't know about "social media"---but I wasn't going to have a social life for the foreseeable future.

  • JohnR1972JohnR1972

    This phenomenon has nothing to do with having someone’s phone number in your phone. I know an ER nurse in Indiana who had ER patients pop up on her “people you may know” list on Facebook, just hours after they had been in the ER. The first time it happened she thought it was a coincidence but then it happened about 5 more times over the next week.

    I’ve also heard from another person about sitting in a doctors office waiting room with a random person (clearly another patient of the same doctor) and then having that person show up in their “people you may know” list the following day.

  • jrome678jrome678

    @JohnR1972 it does have something to do with having someone's phone number. Facebook has multiple tools to match people. Email and Nearby devices are two other tools used by Facebook and other apps. The situation you mentioned probably was due to having Nearby devices set to allowed.

  • disneysamuraidisneysamurai

    Good thing I purged by Facebook account.

  • SuzyqcuddleSuzyqcuddle
    edited November 2025

    Facebook suggests by phone number and even has something that can recognize people in your surroundings. I saw a guy sitting near me in a restaurant pop up as a suggestion.

  • ecuddlebliss21ecuddlebliss21

    Of course... jrome678 has described the scenario I had had in Starbucks near a college community.

    I received a nice text which I didn't respond there. I promptly reviewed the new cellular security settings, and found 'Nearby devices set to allowed' along with the lists of open devices in this cafe!
    I had to disabled this default option set by the factory.

  • AshenlightAshenlight
    edited November 2025

    I’m just shocked that there are pros who give out their real number.

    Burner app. You’re welcome.

  • KatotaKatota

    Facebook isn't my thing...So whatever! 😏

  • KatotaKatota

    This is really only a problem if for some reason, cuddling needs to be a secret.

    👍👍👍👍

    @AlyLauren True, good thing cuddling isn't a secret for me either. Lol! So there's nothing to "out" me for as I have already "out" myself so to speak. 😜😁

  • AlyLaurenAlyLauren

    @Katota my thoughts exactly. 🤣 can't be outed if everyone already knows

    The only time I was a little uncomfy was when a potential cuddle client also sent me a like or something on a dating app. Tried to message me for a date and then messaged me here for a session the same day. That was awkward. I turned down both messages immediately.

  • Ironman294Ironman294

    I’ve had many show up on Facebook and Instagram. As a matter of fact one time I had 4 in a row on Facebook suggestions.

  • MorpheusMorpheus

    Ya’ll still use Facebook?

  • DEV_in_MNDEV_in_MN
    edited November 2025

    I think sometimes if you someone shows up it implies that you or they searched for you profile at some point

  • foreverforloveforeverforlove

    I was just talking about this with @Goddess_IAM !
    I have mixed feelings about it because It feels like an invasion of privacy but I also have nothing to hide…

  • JohnR1972JohnR1972

    Privacy isn’t about “having something to hide”, it is about consent.

    When two people meet and are getting to know each other (I am talking in general, not just cuddling) there is a process of reciprocal disclosure. You share some things about yourself and the other person shares some things about themselves, if no red flags have been raised, both parties consent to round 2 by sharing more about themselves, whenever and however they are comfortable sharing.

    Invasion of privacy is when a 3rd party short circuits this process by divulging information about one of the parties before that person consented to that information being shared - “Hey, did you know that person you are having dinner with declared bankruptcy 4 years ago, is a month behind on their rent, and is currently on anti-depressants?”

    There are websites for the big stuff, such as registered sex offenders, where potentially safety critical information can be readily accessed, but social media, and people search websites, greatly complicate the consensual disclosure process.

  • MelancholyMelancholy

    Unless you're new to Facebook this shouldn't be a surprise...I mean fb has been doing this kind of thing for decades.
    It used to suggest the plumber and dentist to me as fb friends. Its very annoying.
    You can lock down your account and tell it to stop suggesting friends. At least they stopped it from letting you search for people directly using their # but I'm sure it uses saved numbers as a way of finding people to suggest.
    Don't invade her privacy...ignore it...I have had people who no longer pro cuddle show up on my FB and I ignore it....let them live their lives in peace.

  • AuraOfComfortAuraOfComfort

    To stop people from finding you on Facebook using your phone number,

    1. go to Settings & privacy
    2. Then Settings,
    3. Then find How people find and contact you. In the "Audience and visibility" section, select People with your phone number and set the audience to No one. You should also make sure the phone number on your profile is set to Only me under your Contact Info.
  • MorpheusMorpheus

    Over the years, I’ve come across several pros from CC on social media and it’s mainly due to being connected because of our phone numbers. I’ve added pros as friends, some add me back, some ignore me. There are pros who create social media profiles with the same profile name they use on CC so that clients and or CC members will find them off site and or it’s just another way to stay connected. The reality is that now a days it’s extrmely easy to find information about people. If you’re in this thread and shocked that someone found you on Facebook, you shouldn’t be surprised at all.

  • AL3XGage_06AL3XGage_06

    I haven't read every single reply. I see people mentioning device permissions.

    As a piece of general advice here.

    Facebook/Meta (and nearly every single other app) will ask about permissions. They will do it independently on each device you use them on so be aware of that. If you told Facebook no snooping at your MS Outlook contacts on a PC it'll ask when you install it on your phone too. Many people click-through these without reading. Unfortunately for some apps and services they demand permission for things you might feel are unnecessary so there's that.

    With Facebook in particular you should be aware of just how big the Meta Ecosystem has become now.
    Facebook, Messenger (Facebook Messenger), Instagram, Threads, and WhatsApp.

    While it is highly convenient in some ways Meta very strongly pushes you towards a unified account system across the platforms. I suspect for many people this is where most people run into issues as what I'll refer to as unintentional spillage.

    For example here I did not give Facebook permission for contacts but might've done it for Instagram once. That was the only door needed to let Meta into my contacts list. Now I get follow suggestions for Facebook, Threads, and Instagram all based on that spillage of phone contacts just into Instagram.

    At the same time I use Instagram for no-brain following. A bunch of media personality, memes, and a bunch of stuff which I find entertaining. Alternately my Facebook is actually pretty sanitized and sterile as I use it for family and floor hockey. I work in a field where it's generally better to have a boring public face as well. This is a roundabout way of saying I don't need Facebook broadcasting to some of my Facebook Friends (Like my MOM) who I follow on Instagram. There was a reason I kept Instagram follows on Instagram. Well it doesn't matter now because Facebook made the connection of what my Insta username was and now with the ad driven feed I get all of THAT thrown at me on Facebook.

    The only way to keep things safe I think is..

    Unique Email
    Unique Phone Number
    Unique 2FA Methods as well

    Accept that eventually spillage will happen between any apps or media you use on the same physical device. If your privacy and isolation between things is absolutely paramount you need to maintain totally separate devices, possibly on different carriers and use different payment methods.

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