Ghosting!

Comments

• SunsetSnuggles

  January 13

  @NomadNest
  Threads like yours are typically met with a barrage of men saying to stop whining and women saying to stop acting entitled.

  Honestly, the subject of being ghosted, feeling rejected, etc. comes up incessantly because it is obviously a huge shared experience here, and it's disheartening to see people get stomped on for it over and over.

  Is anyone entitled to a response? No. Are there likely a vast array of reasons that likely have nothing to do with you that may explain their absence? Yes.

  But people could certainly do each other the courtesy of being honest and give each other the chance to contemplate and potentially improve. I think, when feasible, this is the best option. It's absolutely not always feasible, and my inbox reflects that clearly, but if we can do better, why wouldn't we?

  Thank you for sharing so openly.

  ~ Sunset Snuggles

  🫂 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Junkie 📷 Shutter Bug
• CuddleswithNoah

  January 13 edited January 13

  @SunsetSnuggles .... Well said
• NomadNest

  January 13

  @SunsetSnuggles ... I agree that no one is entitled to a response. If someone never replies to an initial message, that doesn’t bother me at all. What feels harder is being left mid-conversation—especially after a photo has been seen—because it can feel very personal and rejecting, even if that wasn’t the intent.

  And yes, my point is really about courtesy. A simple “not interested” goes a long way. I understand that it’s not always feasible, and that people have many reasons that have nothing to do with the other person. Still, if we’re capable of being a bit more honest and kind, why not try?

  The CC, of all places, feels like it should be one where people can engage respectfully, even when attraction isn’t there. Ghosting purely because you didn’t like someone’s looks can feel unnecessarily harsh, and I think a little humanity would make the space better for everyone.
• SunsetSnuggles

  January 13

  @NomadNest posted: "I understand that many people prefer to cuddle with someone they find attractive, and that often leaves very little space for people like us who may not have a fair complexion or fit conventional beauty standards."

  "Ghosting purely because you didn’t like someone’s looks can feel unnecessarily harsh"

  Has anyone stated that this is their reason for ghosting, or are you assuming?

  I think in life, we project our insecurities onto the actions of others, without realizing it. I am insecure about my weight, so if I am rejected, I am prone to wondering if that person had an issue with my weight. I knew a woman who attributed every negative interaction to her being female. Perhaps you feel insecure with your skin tone or looks so you assume other people do, too.

  It's important to recognize that what matters to us may not even be on anyone else's mind.

  ~ Sunset Snuggles

  🫂 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Junkie 📷 Shutter Bug
• Mike403

  January 13

  Ghosts are scary.
• BlueIris Mod

  January 13

  Women often receive hostile, aggressive and profane messages if they indicate any disinterest or say no, no matter how politely. I've seen many of these types of messages that women have shared on other platforms. I've been the recipient of messages like that myself.

  Some men take a "no, thank you" as the opening of a negotiation and continue messaging and hounding, perhaps hoping to wear down their quarry.
• coolrunnings12

  January 13

  Pretty wild how often people post something then get banned. This one was an unfortunate experience for this person
• TheFunCartel

  January 13 edited January 13

  Pretty wild how often people post something then get banned.

  @coolrunnings12 They do not get banned for complaining, they get banned for other things. I would speculate that this was so quick that the person who ghosted saw the thread he started and turned in the DMs and/or text messages which broke TOS and led to the ghosting.

  They can complain about ghosting and pros and not getting anyone to cuddle them and that is fine. What normally seems to be the end result is even when they are given constructive criticism, good explanations, or logical responses they ignore them and turn it into a piss and moaning thread. That eventually earns them a time out. In other words, they are throwing a well-disguised temper tantrum. I have seen some threads where the OP does take advice and logic to heart, but that is rare.
• disneysamurai

  January 13

  Yet another fly by night post where the OP has the red circle and X of death.
• TheFunCartel

  January 13

  @disneysamurai A lot of these are just people that are already banned making fake accounts too. The OP’s account when I checked it was just created in January 2026. So this would not be a surprise if he was banned for that either as he states about “bad experiences” when he just joined. You just joined and you have multiple bad experiences? I have had maybe two not so great ones over several years. Some of these people are not very clever.
• coolrunnings12

  January 13

  I usually send my photo right away and get the ghosting over with lol.
• TheFunCartel

  January 13

  I don’t really worry about ghosting. It is the way of the world now. I did not know the person before and I still do not, so my world has not changed. I think people my age have this mentality because we did not have social media, cell phones, or computers and if you wanted to know someone, befriend someone, or ask someone out on a date you had to talk to them directly in person or over the phone. Rejection was something very real as this could take place in front of others you know, so you had to learn social coping skills. With the internet, the possibilities for connection became infinite and not so personal, but at the same time, with the diminished opportunities for social practice of coping in real life, expectations become magnified and sitting in a room with a computer with only “virtual” friends the perceived rejections from ghosting become personal. You used to learn that rejection doesn’t stem from you necessarily, but from the preferences of others because you received feedback. Ghosting and a reduction of real life interaction has taken that feedback away and those with low self-esteem internalize that negatively.
• Goonie4life

  January 13

  Didn't ghosting start with the millennials? It's definitely not a Gen X thing.
• TheFunCartel

  January 13

  @Goonie4life I can’t speak to when any of that started, I can only tell you what it was like in the Stone Age.
• coolrunnings12

  January 13

  @Goonie4life we would just take the phone off the hook, lol
• 7gem

  January 13

  
• CuddleDuncan Mod

  January 13 edited January 13

  1) It is very common for ghosting to be nothing to do with the ghostee. People drift away from the site, lose track of their messages, find what they are looking for in somebody else .... a host of reasons.

  2) If you meet somebody online, don't meet them in person, and have no other means of communication, then it is absolutely certain that somebody will be ghosted sooner or later. It's just a question of when. Ghosting is a more or less unversal ending, until you are sufficiently integrated into somebody's life that you would be informed at once should they meet an unexpected demise. In other words, unless the person's best friend has your number, you're going to be ghosted.

  Expressing surprise when a predicatable and inevitable event occurs .... is one of the reasons I find it difficult to fit in with you humans.

  ---

  Ghosting has always existed of course, but it became a routine of life with the rise of the smartphone.
• Gooding

  January 13

  I recently visited a Pros profile. But I did not contact her because she clearly said minimum 2 hours for first booking. She contacted me and asked whether I am interested. I told her the reason why I didn't initiate. She sweetly closed the conversation and immediately blocked me. 🥺

  I felt this emotional relief for not having cuddled with her...
• SunsetSnuggles

  January 13

  He was banned because it was a duplicate account. Play stupid games, win a free trip to banned camp.

  ~ Sunset Snuggles

  🫂 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Junkie 📷 Shutter Bug
• 7gem

  January 15

  If someone ghosts you, respect the dead and never disturb them again.
• Katota

  January 16

  If someone ghosts you, respect the dead and never disturb them again.

  👍👍👍👍👍

  @7gem
• Katota

  January 16

  @7gem Now, IF said ghost 👻 wishes to return back to YOUR LAND OF THE LIVING...Lol 😆

  Then I suggest you Ghostbuster him/her by blocking and ignoring said ghost...👻🚫
  
• 7gem

  January 16

  I thought ghosting was when I put my arms around you and taught you pottery.
• pmvines

  January 16

  @7gem

  I believe that is what's known as the Swayze
• 7gem

  January 16

  @pmvines Thanks, I knew it must have had a name.😊
• pmvines

  January 16

  @7gem

  Also known as the swayzes from the 80s
• great_pillow08

  January 16

  @NomadNest - It's really not that personal. For some people, seeing someones face takes the mystery out of it and they just lose interest. I absolutely would NOT give it another moments thought!
• BlueIris Mod

  January 16

  @great_pillow08 He's not giving it any thought. He was banned several days ago.
• Katota

  January 17

  @7gem 😆😆😆😆
• jps76

  January 17 edited January 17

  I thought the Swayze was a dirty dance move.

  From OP's post, the mistake was assuming anything.

  Ghosting has always been a thing, it just didn't have a name until the last few decades. I'm still waiting for my 8th grade crush to respond to my love letter. Damn it Tricia!