Bad day... Crying during cuddle?

SophiabeldrisSophiabeldris
in General

I've yet to cuddle with anyone as an actual event, but wondered if anyone has had a bad day, managed to have a cuddle and became a blubbering mess afterwards? As if the act of kindness from a mutual cuddle left you feeling so vulnerable that you suddenly could not help but release the emotion? I know when I'm having a rotten day, a kind word or act of kindness does sometimes get the waterworks going! Is that awkward for the other cuddler, perhaps?

Comments

  • [Deleted User]creedhands (deleted user)

    I think that if I was the other cuddler, I would feel honored that you found yourself so comfortable with me that you would be able to let the emotions loose. If you ever get to my area, feel free to come over and cry while I hold you.

  • CreativeCuddlesCreativeCuddles

    I’m with @creedhands ?

  • calineurcalineur

    I can think of at least two times I cried while cuddling. Interestingly, both times, with a difference of about a year’s time, were about the same thing: the loss of my favorite professional cuddlist. The first time was only temporary (She came back and I saw her many times again). The second time I cried though because it was for good (or for bad, from my point of view).

    But the OP’s question specifically mentions “afterwards”. No, my two crying episodes were definitely during the session. And they were strong feelings but brief.

  • SophiabeldrisSophiabeldris

    Awwww! Thank you to both of you! If I'm ever traveling you way, I will let you guys know!

  • SophiabeldrisSophiabeldris

    Well... Afterwards it during... What I meant by afterwards was... After the cuddle began. I probably should have been more specific. :)

    I have cried during a massage and cried in my mom's lap after a dating fiasco occurred, but never during a cuddle. I could imagine that losing a professional cuddler would lead to tears!

    I once took a class on healing touch as part of palliative care and one of the things that they noticed was that people tended to become very attached to those that touched them lovingly. Amazing how that works!

  • [Deleted User]ivlegend (deleted user)

    From personal experience I can say, there were times that I almost had tears in my eyes after a session. It's amazing how a touch can help you and I think it's fine to ?...

  • SophiabeldrisSophiabeldris

    Ya... I think it's fine to cry, too... As long as one feels comfortable with the other person and vice versa.

  • AngelPendavezAngelPendavez

    When I cuddle with someone, I do my best hold space for them to be exactly as they are, crying is perfectly fine.

    I will hold you and possibly try to make you laugh ~ ^^

  • SophiabeldrisSophiabeldris

    Awww! That's so sweet, @EarthlyAngel003 ! Thank you!

  • [Deleted User]MrTenderHeart (deleted user)

    ....... I'm bringing a book to print... Well maybe not print on a book by Thanksgiving called' miracles on demand'... In the process is been a life of research; yes, the longest I've had as a couple is been three weeks. Meaning being with the person every night for most every night... And substantially more; and I'm talking about a Cuddle.. The energy-- that makes us animate-- is, in my opinion form of quantum love energy. It's a wave one is not attached to the body-- and when it's not attached -- or described in a word; it affects one person who touches the other one-- and I don't mean a personal touch mean just hug or being in the person's presence. Now for me-- what that did was produce tears. Seriously, being so connected to a person. That when the thought of leaving the person was apparent. Tears would naturally crop up. Now when laughter occurs-- that can result in tears. But when love is flowing-- not sex- when love is flowing. Tears are one of the side effects. A highly sensitive person will experience leaking tears. I think that's the greatest joy about cuddling. If you truly like the person-- it's pretty awesome. Bruno...KC my cat is proof he demand a cuddle --if not he bites me--then runs away. smile {CAT AND MOUSE AND ME}

  • [Deleted User]GuyLikesMusic (deleted user)

    I can totally understand how that would happen. Sometimes finally feeling validated after a long time, even non-verbally, can release all that tension and it's a beautiful thing.

  • SophiabeldrisSophiabeldris

    Even feeling validated in a moment of a day full of invalidation, I think could lead to that @GuyLikesMusic !

    Interesting thoughts on the idea of cuddles as some sort of quantum waves, @MrTenderHeart ! I am very sensitive to energy and have been making concentrated efforts to do healing work for people and one of the things I am curious about is energy work in conjunction to cuddles.

    My bestie says that when I do energy work on her, she can feel the vibration of it, which is fascinating to me! I have another session with her this afternoon.

    Just cuddling with someone else totally vibed them for the rest of the day! I'm really curious how my energy effects others!

    Also....when someone cries.... I have been known to cry with them. And when I can feel the energy of their pain somewhere in their body, the intensity of it takes my breath, and I also want to cry for them. I know it is their's and not mine, but wow... It can be painful! But I am strong and can take it...

    But ya... Cuddles and heals... I'm good for it!

    I originally wrote this post, because I know how intense I can be and how sometimes it can be too much for others, and I wanted to gauge the overall community feel of crying during cuddles or because the cuddles offered a kind of releasing validation... :)

  • [Deleted User]BearEssential (deleted user)

    I also agree with @creedhands and @CreativeCuddles

  • [Deleted User]helldiver19 (deleted user)

    I met with someone the day after I joined this site last week...we texted the night I joined and then I went to his house the next day...spent all day cuddling and then we spend the next two full days together cuddling, watching movies, listening to music- we just instantly connected so deeply. And every day I was with him I cried at some point. Usually there was a point in each day where we turned everything off and just laid together- that’s when all my emotions would hit strongly. Years of not being talked to or touched or held- it was so deep and so raw. And he just held me while I wept- truly wept. I literally felt like he gave life to my soul- and that’s no exaggeration. I slept better than I had in years those nights after we spent the day together.
    Unfortunately I got ghosted after that which was devastating to say the least. We texted daily for a few days and made plans to meet again but then he wouldn’t text me back the day of the plans. Then it happened again..but now I’ve just gotten radio silence for a few days. Message received.
    I feel like such a fool. One thing he said when we first talked was how he believes in honesty bc he had been hurt before- and he said he would never just disappear...
    It’s like a knife to the heart being vulnerable with someone and sharing your soul and then just get discarded with no explanation.

    Wow sorry, didn’t mean to make a pity party haha. I just wanted to say how normal I belive it is to have such emotional release when being touched and held. It is so powerful :)

  • PaulaDahlaPaulaDahla

    @helldiver19 that sounds wonderfully cathartic. I notice you listed yourself as in a relationship and I'm assuming it's not with the cuddler you just spoke of.

    I have learned that God brings people into our lives to help us grow. Your cuddler may have been a way for you to be able to safely release all those pent up emotions. Now that you have been able to purge those negative emotions and ingrained beliefs you are free to move forward into the life you are meant to have. You've only been on the site for less than a month so I don't know how recent this was but have you noticed a change in your regular life after being able to have new life breathed into your soul? Do you still feel it? Does it influence your relationship, work, daily interactions in a positive way? I hope it does, I assume it does.

    That being said, my point is this; take it for the gift it was. A precious, soul renewing gift that will allow you to move forward into your adult life, free and unencumbered by past hurts and hindrances. Say thank you to the cuddler, write it, text it, phone it and leave a vm, or just send it to yourself as a text or message. It will be released and you can move on. With joy, confidence, and excitement for the rest of your life. All because this cuddler helped you release what needed to be purged from your Self. Find acceptance that your cuddle with him may be just the one time thing. It was a gift, if you never see him again or if maybe he reaches out to you in a month or a year, be glad you received healing and allow it to be what it will be.

  • [Deleted User]helldiver19 (deleted user)

    @PaulaDahla I cannot thank you enough for such kind words. Really- you helped change my perspective on the situation. I absolutely noticed a change in my life after those few days- I felt lighter, emotionally. I felt warm inside again instead of frozen. And it did open me up to meeting someone else on here who has been amazing and a safe place for me.
    It’s hard to not take it personally and wonder what I did to make someone just never want to talk again lol. But you’re so right- it was a gift he gave me, regardless. And he helped me purge years of pain that was pent up inside and now I’m so much more open. So I am grateful to him for that. And it less me to who I am talking to now, which is the safest I’ve felt in a very long time.

    People like you and others on this site are an absolute treasure. Humans connecting at the soul level- leaving the other junk out of it and it just being humans to one another. I’m so thankful for what this site has brought I to my life. Thank you so much for your kindness...it really helped!

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