Please Don’t Contact Me Outside This Site

snugglesafe8snugglesafe8
in General

I will start off my saying that I understand people may be here to get some support outside of their marriages and don’t want to leave a paper trail on here but you should never EVER contact me by doing a reverse image search and emailing or calling me. I will automatically assume you’re a creep, it is extremely unprofessional to reach out to pros outside of this website. I’m interested in hearing some perspectives on this but I felt incredibly violated being contacted by email by a potential client 😅

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Comments

  • disneysamuraidisneysamurai

    These are people you haven’t connected with prior on the site?

  • Comet85Comet85

    Sounds immensely reportable

  • SolarisSolaris

    Yeah, 10000% not ok. I would never trust someone who did that.

  • Mike403Mike403

    This is stalkerish behavior. Let me make it easy for you fellas, unless they give you their contact info, you do not have consent to call/text them off site.

  • AdragayleAdragayle

    That's creepy. Takes pushing boundaries to the next level. Definitely report this person if you haven't already.

  • TichantoPTichantoP

    Going to such lengths to go outside the established structure is an big Red Flag

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod
    edited April 4

    Yes, Report them please.

    To make your profile invisible to non-members go to Settings and look for Privacy.

    The forum can be seen by the public, so your username and profile thumbnail. There is nothing to stop you having a blank or lovely butterfly for your main photo, with actual photos later or hidden.

  • snugglesafe8snugglesafe8

    @disneysamurai I have not connected with this person on the site nor do I know who he is bc he used a fake email account 🙄

  • BrandiBrandi

    That would be extremely unsettling. This website is so easy to send messages, to go out of the way to find a different platform or way to reach out is unnecessary and gives major red flags. Sorry you had that happen.

  • snugglesafe8snugglesafe8

    @CuddleDuncan if I knew who they were I’d report them 😅 thank you for the advice I’ve changed my settings now!

  • CuddlesofcuddleCuddlesofcuddle

    Someone recognized me from the site while I was having dinner with my aunt at a restaurant and actually came up to me and called me by my username. I was so taken back bc to this day I haven't seen him on the site. If my aunt didn't know I cuddled already I would have been mortified.
    She continued crunching on her broccoli and afterwards told me ,"you can't surprise me anymore" lol 😅🤣

  • AdragayleAdragayle

    @CuddleDuncan I thought pros are required to have a face photo that is not hidden. Is this not true? Are we allowed to hide our faces on our profiles? Please clarify the rules regarding this.

  • CuddlesofcuddleCuddlesofcuddle

    That's what I thought too.

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod
    edited April 4

    @Adragayle you are absolutely right and that rule is strictly enforced. However, in view of the exceptional event that has just occurred I have allowed @snugglesafe8 to keep hers hidden as a temporary measure.

    Edit: as background, when a Moderator issues an instruction to a member they are typically given a few days to comply. It might easily be a couple of days before they even see the message, and a several more before they are able to fix the problem.

  • AdragayleAdragayle
    edited April 4

    @CuddleDuncan
    What about @Cuddlesofcuddle, she was approached and outed in front of a family member. Will she also be allowed to hide her face if she chooses to? See her post above. Who's to say who it will happen to next??

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod

    @Adragayle I will DM you.

  • HuggycatbearHuggycatbear

    I cannot add any more that others haven't said.

    It is inappropriate and creepy.

  • OhioMikeOhioMike

    Maybe professionals should have the OPTION of having their face photo optional like clients and enthusiasts. Yes I know it may affect their business among other things , hence it being an option , but if we all agree that safety of members is priority one it kinda makes sense.
    When applicable the professional can send pics thru the site messaging. I mean we already do that for enthusiasts and clients

    ( Please remember I wrote that professionals should have the option )

  • johnstrousejohnstrouse

    That doesn’t make any sense unfortunately that person did that. I’m sure other people won’t. I would never see a Cuddler in public and approached them by their username in the front of people that’s crazy.

  • SpicyNSweetSpicyNSweet

    I'm so so sorry that happened to you. How incredibly violating.

  • AdragayleAdragayle

    I apologize if I've caused any conflict here. What @OhioMike said about the option to have photo hidden or not - 💯
    I'm glad for the bend in the rules for OP. Safety is paramount.

    I'm just trying to understand the rules.
    Growing up in a DV household, knowing the rules and following them were so important to my safety and wellbeing. When a member has something like this happen, it's incredibly scary and can be triggering. That in combination with the rules being unclear, can create a sense of danger and the desperation of the need to know the rules before one is unintentionally broken is so overpowering, my words, tone and mannerisms may seem like an attack, critical even, it was never my intention.

    But now I know the rules - pros are required to show a face photo except for the ones who are not. Thank you for clarifying.

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    @snugglesafe8
    Did they say they reverse image searched you? Is it an e-mail account you've used for cuddlers in the past? If the latter, it's possible it's someone you've already met. 🫤 Unnerving, no matter how it happened...

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

    🫂 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Junkie 📷 Shutter Bug

  • HuggycatbearHuggycatbear

    I love that exceptions can be made to protect someone. Thank you, @CuddleDuncan.

  • MeltMyWayMeltMyWay

    Creepy AF ... I get texts in the middle of the night from prior clients or almost clients and it irritates my soul. Don't text me after 10 or before 9am
    People can be sooo rude

  • great_pillow08great_pillow08

    That’s borderline stocking!! May even be flat out stocking!

  • snugglesafe8snugglesafe8

    Update* This person is still emailing me despite clear communication asking him to stop I’ve now escalated this to the police as I’m being stalked and harassed.

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod

    Really sorry to hear that @snugglesafe8. Sounds like you've done the right thing.

  • PeacefulHuman69PeacefulHuman69

    I think what should happen to keep both sides safe is keep all communication on the site even when you arrive at a session. I mean both sides. This would keep everyone honest. And keep photos generic and of plants, buildings, etc.

  • trysdettrysdet

    That's my purse! I don't know you!!! Self defense tactic as demonstrated by Bobby Hill

  • consciousseekerconsciousseeker
    edited April 6

    When my ex partner stared a new business (Massage Therapy), she was using a free text/calls app. Turned off notifications outside working hours. Prior to that, she was getting calls from all sorts of numbers in the middle of the night.

    I think using a secondary number can keep some of these creeps away.

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