I think it should be posted here so everyone can take further steps to have a real conversation with others and make sure that both of them want the same thing. I hate when people take advantages of something beautiful and turn it into something bad, so hopefully we can help each other to keep this website safe and trustworthy by offering platonic touches and cuddling with super strict boundaries. In addition to that, we should report those people once we find any.
Thanks for bringing this to everyone and hope all of you an amazing cuddling session.
@SqueezeBuddy right on 👊
I think you missed the point lol. Look up the word “hypothetical”.
I started out as an Enthusiast… I found that some of the people I met expected and asked for “extras” because they thought “ hey!” , she’s an enthusiast, she cuddles for “ free” , she probably does everything!” 🤮 they were sadly mistaken.. I became a Pro because I was tired of putting so much time and effort into arranging to meet for cuddles when I was being disrespected by creepy guys who were looking for more than platonic.. I still get some messages from people looking for more than platonic.. I block them and report right away.. simple.. It is very annoying and disgusting though.. the ones that offer or ask for extra services are ruining the site for those of us that have higher morals and values .. self respect.. they could even put our lives in danger.. the OP should definetly not be charging $144… She should raise her fees like I did for her sanity and because of all the bs we have to go through just to get a decent client.. I’m not saying they are all bad, I’ve met wonderful people too.. I 100% agree that the bad apples are ruining it for the bunch! There are different sites they can go on if they are seeking other things.. They need to go elsewhere ., as far as fees over $100, $144, $175 …. If you don’t want to pay that much.., then don’t… so simple.. there are good people here that have lower fees and enthusiasts are nice too! Stop “assuming/insinuating” that a higher fee means “ extra services” .. meh 😑, 😣 ugh! Gross! I actually have found that since I have raised my fee I have not had any issues ., Only lovely , kind and respectful ., those I left good karma for deserved it and those I did not leave karma for in the past know exactly why I didn’t write a review for them. I report them if they give me a reason.. non platonic people need to stay off this site!
I second that
So well said @SweetCuddler33
@SweetCuddler33 yeah, I've received far more inappropriate contacts as an enthusiast then I did as a pro. And when I first started out, I intentionally priced low because accessibility is important for me. What I found was that instead it seemed to increase the number of people asking for "extras". So I ended up raising my prices to area averages and then started offering discounts to established clients instead. Sure, I still got inappropriate questions, but far fewer of them 🤷🏻♀️ and again, now that I've been an enthusiast for awhile, I have far more messages from banned folks than previously
A friend, which this is platonic only would want you to feel safe and be safe. I’m having a hard time finding that on here
Certainly beyond photos cuddlers send mixed signals. Had 3 cuddles in a week with same person. First session was great. Connected well personality wise and cuddle was great. Second session she pushed platonic boundaries We do not need a long list of specific details - BlueIris I was starting to develop some emotional and physical desire for this person. Nothing progressed beyond that and I decided to stop seeing her for cuddles because I felt it was nothing more than her luring me with false temptations and expectations of a more emotional and physical relationship that would not happen. She also frequently asked me questions about my sex life and sex preferences. In the end I feel like I was just being preyed upon to keep booking as I already spent $800 or so. I felt like a bit of a fool afterwards.
I also just almost booked a session with another cuddler. Thankfully bcuz of the industry I work in i was able to deep dive vet her and stumbled across a SW post she has. Which isn't what I'm looking for.Andvyes I also did a deep search for the previous cuddler but no red flags came up. Do NOT out people with names or identifying info on a public forum. If you have a problem, report the person. - BlueIris
Anyway I did a few more searches on other "pro cuddlers" and two other ones matched up with ads for SW. Frankly I love the concept of this website but seems like it's still in the wild wild west stage.where "pros" aren't vetted properly nor are clients. I would fathom a guess that if all parties involved had to verify themselves with providing ID at sign up and having payments processed through the website, you'd see a huge drop-off in bad actors both selling more than cuddles and clients looking for more than cuddles. But I'm guessing this website knows what really goes on and it would make them liable for promoting SW if they facilitate such safety measures. As well as scare away all the bad actor clients.
I recently raised my prices to $125 an hour because I rent space in a cabin so a portion goes to rent plus the 15% CC fee. If someone doesn't see the value in my service, they don't have to book with me. I'm fine with that. But I don't think $125 when I'm spending almost two hours on a one hour session (setting up & breaking down the space, travel, etc.) and paying the rental fee and CC fee isn't unreasonable. I understand that it might be cost prohibitive for some folks, but $125 shouldn't signal SW. Honestly SW's should charge a lot more than that, especially in Ann Arbor where it's decriminalized.
Exactly right @SweetCuddler33
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With all the price talk, are we saying that people who have a certain higher economic status or advantage to be safer?
This is what makes me sad. Same with so much statistic waving. The individual doesn't get a chance to shine anymore.
It's so much of this if X persons do this, therefore I don't trust any of them.
I wish the sex workers, scammers, and neanderthal men would F off. They do ruin it for the rest of us who seek to be held in simple steps. They are selfish and prevent the whole world from connecting better.
And unfortunately, I think society is getting more sick. And this community in particular attracts a lot of wounded people who are not right for platonic connection, which beckons for mutual respect and a certain level of innocence to be involved. These kinds of people destroy it, one person at a time.
@Adragayle So people can discuss the problem but not actually identify people who are the problem? So I can say someone took all the money from the cookie jar and if I say it was Bob, then that's bad? And if I say be careful dealing with Bob because he took all the money from the cookie jar then that's bad? I'd think people would be happy I'm warning potential clients against booking with this person. It's a PSA. Not like I'm posting false information or stuff that isn't publicly available on the Internet.
@weluvcuddles No outing people in the forums. Those are the rules. That's what the report button is for.
@CuddleStudio I was always under the assumption that SW would not list their price here. That they would offer and hit you up for more if they see you in person?
Gotcha, so warning people (against illegal services) with facts who are potentially booked with them or considering such is against the rules. Duly noted. Funny how I submitted a report but site seems more concerned with me mentioning the SW than it does removing a bad actor who probably offers more than platonic cuddles. Because her profile is still active and I'm threatened with banishment. Seems more like the site pretending to care about than actually doing anything about it. But it's a private entity so do as you please.
@Huggycatbear my point was in response to the post on page 1 of this discussion that says higher prices signify a "wink and a nod". I was not clear about that though.
@weluvcuddles This needs to be addressed. How reporting can backfire on some of us.
Sorry mods, this was my experience as well. Reported a SW who tried to manipulate me when she sent me her webpage of offerings. She got a temp ban and was right back after removing her web page.
She obviously was getting back to it and making more money with the visibility of this site, to be willing to take her page down.
Which can just pop up under a diff address.
After an SW gets reported and if they get a temp ban, are they monitored in any way after they come back?
@weluvcuddles @Huggycatbear Well, the site is making a commission off them sooo… 🤗
I have to agree that all the women charging extremely high prices could be a potential red flag implying that they offer extras. I've always kept my prices the same, I do 3 hours for $200. Of course not everyone charging high prices is an escort but It seems like a lot of the sugar daddy/escort website people found out about cuddle comfort. Cc basically went viral and now we have all these new cuddlers coming in especially over the last few months charging $150+ an hour.
Then again, folks could also simply stop assuming that they are granted dominion over a person's body just because they are paying them for a service, and stop assuming that because you are paying a woman for her time that means sex is implied.
I don't like this idea of low key slut shaming based off rates. Trying to make someone seem like they are in the wrong for charging rates they feel comfortable charging for their services is a manipulative tactic to try to shame cuddle pros into lowering their prices. As cuddle pros have been on here saying for a long time now, a big reason they have raised their rates and even started charging to begin with is due to all of the bad actors they have to deal with, so stop trying to minimize and justify, and convolute reasoning into why men treat women this way.
@Late_Lily yes for sure and that's why their concern seems fake and just lip service as opposed to any real action to improve standards. I didn't make up her SW page, I'm not sharing misinformation yet I'm the one being threatened with consequences while the SW keeps their charade going. As I mentioned earlier I found other profiles linked to SWs but I mean why should I bother reporting it because nothing will be done to properly vet these bad actors. In the end, the site gets the pimp fees while high and mightily proclaiming no SW traffic allowed and turn a blind eye to it knowing it goes on. Anyhow, done my rant
@weluvcuddles Yup. 💯
@weluvcuddles
Funny how I submitted a report but site seems more concerned with me mentioning the SW than it does removing a bad actor who probably offers more than platonic cuddles. Because her profile is still active and I'm threatened with banishment.
We have an all volunteer mod team here. Mods are located from the UK to the California west coast. Your report was submitted 3 hours ago, which by my time was 6 am. So most of the mods were probably sleeping. We typically don't come on the forum to announce the results of report actions taken, but your report has already been acted on.
Please quote where you were "threatened with banishment."
@Carrie_Anne posted: "There are men here who are Pros and they charge for their time to cuddle also. Granted they rarely get booked…"
I would love to see the stats on male Pro's. I would be very surprised if they ever book female clients. In four years, I've read about two women say they'd like to hire a male Pro, and neither have.
@Carrie_Anne posted: "if a Male Pro was charging $144 per hr for a cuddle, would you think he’s offering sex? Would women automatically think that?"
I have absolutely seen men on here who I suspect are selling sexual services. Some Pro's, some untagged Pro's.
There are guys with very suspicious pictures and verbiage. When someone with Chippendale-esque pictures calls me honey in his opening PM... 😆 Yeah.
Regarding the price, most male Pro's I've come across are new and have no clue about the cuddle world, and start off at around $100 an hour. I chalk that up to a complete lack of research on the demand for what they're trying to sell. If I saw a guy at $144, depending on his profile, I would likely suspect he's selling more.
~ Sunset Snuggles
🫂 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Junkie 📷 Shutter Bug
I think my comment was taken too literally - my mistake. And my point was somehow missed, maybe just too veiled. I did get a great message from someone who knew exactly what I meant so…
@SunsetSnuggles Closest I've got is a male pro who contacted me asking about an overnight cuddle. No mention of payment was made. But he got angry when I wanted to be safe and meet him for coffee first. And he acted confused (in an angry way) that I would assume he wanted me to pay. The last thing he said before blocking me was that he was going to pay me, which I highly doubt even if it weren't against the rules. I suspect he was using a pro badge as a way of falsely claiming to be a safe person.
I did report the messages. I didn't see anything done but he later deleted his account. I've kept the messages as a kind of "hall of shame".
Hmm, I'm just not seeing how predatory or coercive behaviors by male clients are ever anyone's fault but THEIRS, but okay...
some cities are just full of women taking advantage of the site and selling sexual acts,
@Ginamarie2 How do you know this? What is this assessment based on?