@durantpiano Actually you did use a rating /numbering system for women, example “2/10.” There was another instance but it seems you edited it out. Why would you deny it? You’re old enough now to know better. It’s just a bad impression to make here. But we already know what you’re about. And @Huggycatbear is another one who noticed and commented that he wouldn’t do it.
PLEASE STOP DOING THIS LADIES! PLEASE! There are other sites to date and do such. I'm here to help heal and do healing of my own ✨
@TheFunCartel Most of this thread is based on observational context. What if you don't know their thoughts or feelings, you just see someone with a list of karma from individuals of a certain skin color? What if it's mostly?
What about all black hair? All blonde hair?
@tacpmurg I mostly agree with you. I think the trouble comes more in line with black and white thinking. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. For example I find fatty bumps on the back of a persons legs to be attractive. Also minimal or no makeup.
Scars on display also make a person to be more real to me. Could I be wrong? Sure.
An attractive male will draw my eye. Make me want to talk to him. Or even shy away from him, depending on the day.
Am I gay? No. I'm not.
There is a cuddler who connected with based on her attractive physical features. Normally, I'm a confident guy but when she came over I was like Grace Ashcroft from Resident Evil 9.
"Hu-hu-hu-hi! Wo-wo-wo-wo-would you li-like some coc-oco-nut water?
She also talked elegantly.
Her close presence in cuddling helps me to navigate a world where pretty priviledge is a thing. Not her fault. Not my fault either.
But she is happy to meet up with me again.
What if you don't know their thoughts or feelings, you just see someone with a list of karma from individuals of a certain skin color?
Again, I reserve judgement unless I know the why. They could be doing it because they are racist or they could have the preference based on common backgrounds/class/upbringing or their happy chemicals respond to that type. But I really do not care what someone else’s preferences are if no one is being hurt.
@TheFunCartel Nuance. We are on the same page.
Quite frankly, my preference leans to cuddlers who communicate polysyllabicly rather than “hi”, “yes”, “no” or even worse, just an acronym. Clear communication and entertaining banter has its perks that draw me in.
That is the secret not-so-secret way to my heart. Scheduling and communication to show they care: comfort and safety.
I get a lot of: "hi"
They won't even capitalize that shit lol.
Personal attacks are not tolerated. - BlueIris
I complained once about the type of images professionals were posting here. If cuddling was a legit industry (as in regulated), these type of pictures wouldn't be allowed as they're not professional. I can see that a lot has been cleaned up on this site recently because of complaints though.
Yes, people should be allowed to show their individuality in their pictures, but not when you're offering a professional service.
@SqueezeBuddy yessssss!!!!
There are so many professional profiles that you can just tell that they offered additional services. Ones that post pictures of their butts, have very revealing pictures of their cleavage or even pictures in swimsuits. Also pricing is a big indicator as well.
I can't tell you how many clients I have cuddled with that have asked for sexual services. Being that I am 47 years old, I am able to redirect them or enforce my boundaries much easier than say the 20-something year-olds who don't have as much life experience as I.
I always encourage my clients to report any professional that talks about, mentions or even alludes to offering sexual services to get them off the site. I know there are a lot of men that are looking for that, but there are also a lot of clients that are absolutely not.
It's very sad because professional cuddling is such a wonderful service to offer and it only takes one bad pro to make us all look bad.
Unfortunately, I don't think there is a simple solution to this. I do go out of my way to train other professional professionals and to build a community with people that are trusted who share my same values.
@Carrie_Anne I am flagging the screenshot to a moderator. It clearly shows my words “Most men”…. I “DurantPiano”, have never ranked or rated anyone on this app or in the comment section. 2/10 and 10/10 are simply a point of reference. Again, I have not ranked or rated anyone. Reading on a level of 2/10 is destructive, Comprehension on a level of 10/10 is most ESSENTIAL! Notice I didn’t rate or rank you or anyone in the thread. ✅
@FLCuddleQueen I understand this frustration so much!
Because of the bad apples, it makes all men guilty until proven innocent. And women fear for their safety. Everyone in this entire world would be coming together and caring for another in a few easy steps if it wasn't for all these bad actors.
I've found that the more angry and defensive someone gets when some aspect of their behavior is called out, the more guilty of it they are. Especially when they immediately resort to insults or various forms of "you're the real X" and cherry-picking individual words. And like one of Newton's laws of motion, a person who starts out not listening will continue to not listen.
@durantpiano A rating scale was used, calling it a reference point doesn’t change the wording. No one misread it. Shifting the conversation to someone’s comprehension level isn’t clarifying, it’s deflecting, and I’m flagging that as a personal attack. It might be better to reflect on your own wording instead of gaslighting the people responding.
I’m not here to continue or add to the topic of the thread, but I don’t appreciate seeing a woman being insulted, gaslit, and dismissed while trying to clarify her interpretation. That kind of response is unnecessary and disrespectful.
Editing a comment to remove the problematic part and then trying to gaslight the people who saw it pre-edit is a choice. I do hope the mods can see the original version. So is cherry picking and intentionally putting words in other contexts. And yet we're the ones being accused of poor reading comprehension 🙄 @mauvefox @Carrie_Anne I'm quite sure his reading comprehension is fine - this is a choice made in bad faith because he doesn't like being held accountable.
I know that many people read his words and I appreciate that some have spoken up. Most people have regretted something they’ve said, they apologize and move on.
@123SunnySide
My reference was an analogy to all the sex workers and sex seekers scurrying from the sex sites to here once those sites were shut down. Like bugs when the light is turned on. It's actually not a reference to how I feel about somebody's humanity. But nice try.
I see you are yet another brand new account with a rather specific bone to pick. Let me guess . Previously banned or timed out, and have it out for certain users so coming in with highly opinionated hot takes to stir the kettle? Don't try that with me. You won't win.
Have a nice day or at least the day you deserve
I’ve had one traumatic experience so far, which has made it hard for me to try again without stricter boundaries. I should’ve been enforcing stronger safety protocols in the beginning, but. I learned I guess.
.
@pmvines
Kumbaya my Lord.... Kumbaya
On the other hand, more than half the men that have reached out to me have asked if they can do things that are beyond platonic or overtly sexual. It frustrates me so much because the rules of this site are clear, and now you've both wasted my time and made me uncomfortable.
I'm not sure more than 50% of the population actually knows what the word 'platonic' means, tbh.
@MrKinder is absolutely right. I have no idea of the actual proportion but a considerable minority of the problematic people genuinely neither know nor care what 'platonic' means.
@SoftComforts please Report them all.
Ignorance is easily fixed if the person is willing to listen. Anyone who's been here more than a day and still doesn't know doesn't want to know.
@IronicMaiden Absolutely. Ignorance simply means without knowledge.
I might also say 50% of the people in the world suck.
@Huggycatbear I admire your optimism.
@Huggycatbear
Yes!!!! 🤣 Although probably an underestimate as well. 😁
Lmao, and here I thought I was being pessimistic of our society. I guess we all see it about the same
It's worth mentioning that while people are trying to say, what's wrong with the cuddling community with all these horrible behaviors? Well, that's of the entire world.