Immigrant Life & Touch Starvation: A Love Language Crisis

VelvetLandingVelvetLanding
in General

Immigrant life is wild. You’re leaving home, chasing opportunity, and sometimes your nervous system is 😭 starving for simple things in life: a warm hug, soft touch, real chemistry and the calmness only another sensitive safe person can give.

There’s something called Ulysses Syndrome, it's a type of chronic stress experienced by migrants living far from home, family, culture, stability, and emotional support. Add touch deprivation on top of that and suddenly:

  • you miss your mom’s cooking
  • a hug feels like proper therapy (and it is for me)
  • someone touching your shoulder kindly almost makes you cry
  • you accidentally fall in love with anyone emotionally available 😭 😢 😭

Humans are not designed to survive only on work breaks, Wi Fi, Uber Eats, and just "hang in there", “you got this 💪” texts.

Safe affection regulates the nervous system. Hugs, cuddles, warmth, closeness, laughter, community… all of that matters more than people admit.

Honestly, at this point immigrants don’t just need visas. We need emotional support packages and somebody saying:
“Come here, babe, you’ve been strong for too long.” 😂❤️

(https://i.ibb.co/Kc7NKPmW/1000160670.jpg)

Comments

  • SpicyNSweetSpicyNSweet

    Agreed. Moving at ALL is one of life's greatest stressors, let alone moving from a totally different nation and culture to another. Both my parents are immigrants ❤️
    Everyone in this current political climate would do well to remember the words at the bottom of the Statue of Liberty: "Give me your tired, your poor,
    Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
    The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
    Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
    I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"

    And regardless of your religious views, I would say most people ascribe to the tenets of the Golden Rule. We should all be treating others the way we would want to be treated, especially during times of great fear, pain, loss, etc. And for those who do follow a religion, the vast majority of those have detailed rules about how to treat others, especially people in need. Therefore there is really no excuse to be cruel or bigoted towards immigrants. People are people. Period. 🙌❤️

  • trysdettrysdet

    I was currently thinking about becoming an immigrant elsewhere. Country with lower cost of living. I need to research

  • VitaliVitali

    I am immigrant. Escape my country because war.

  • cuddlefaerycuddlefaery

    I'm sending virtual hugs to all of y'all 🫂

  • VelvetLandingVelvetLanding

    Hugz to you as well. :)

  • acoustic_kittyacoustic_kitty

    Sending Lots of virtual love and cafecitos to those who are missing home 🫂

  • consciousseekerconsciousseeker
    edited May 25

    It has both sides. Except few extreme cases of running away for safety from war, most of us choose this path. Nobody forced us.

    Coming from the slums, earning extra buck here certainly made it possible to provide 1000x better life style to my family. I am extremely thankful for the opportunity this country has provided.
    On the other side - compromising soul. missing watching my nieces growing up, not spending time with parents who are only getting older.

    In early 2010s when I moved, cell phones were still new/not affordable. Had to co-ordinate with multiple parties to talk to my family. My first video call was a huge mission. Making an international call to my friend who has a laptop, went to my place, bought data, used his skype account to call. internet was spotty, audio/video out of sync, low image quality. Oh boy. But those were one of the happiest moments of my life. Seeing my family after many months . Fast forward 2020s thanks to tech and WIFI/internet/cell coverage. A video call is just a touch away.

    If anyone travelling to the states, I would ask mom to make my favorite sweet/savory stuff and send it through them. Sometimes I fly to other state/city to collect those goodies, refrigerate/freeze them and eat slowly, stretching across 2-3 months and wait for the next opportunity to taste my mom's food.

    I do hope people have some awareness about immigrant life, at least make an attempt to educate themselves not just believe every thing they see on shorts/social media and buy into some agendas. I hope they see how we also contribute.
    Most of us on specialized working visas as in - we can do only a specific job that visa was grated for., Not any job. if we are out of job for certain days, then we must leave the country. Lots of corporations are aware and they abuse our vulnerable state. Again we are choosing nobody forcing. When we have mortgages, auto loans, kids in school then our travel plans gets extra stressful. We don't know what's gonna happen at the immigration when we travel back even with all the documents.
    I make all the arrangements before every time I travel to my home country.. just in case.

    I hope people on this platform do not discriminate based on color, race or origin country.

    Thanks @PRosepetal for this meaningful thread, a safe space to express.

  • BellaAineBellaAine

    Human migration is one of the oldest and most constant patterns in history. All living beings have a basic need to preserve life. Finding community and connection with others is part of that instinct, and there’s real strength in seeking it out. Good luck on your journey. Sending you lots of love and healing energy 💛💛💛 Hugs. 🫂💖

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