Hi all, I had a question for both parties. How do you go through your screening process and how do you prefer to be screened?
Read my profile for my cuddle requirements if that helps. K
I'm offering my perspective, as a non-Pro, as the typical person who might be seeking out a professional cuddler, and how you may wish to vet people (like me). I think Kim's advice above, using her profile as an example, is spot on. Your profile is already very detailed, and I would know what (and what not) to expect.
But inviting a stranger into your private accommodation, or you visiting them, has potential dangers for you, and so (as Kim implies), you would probably want to see a picture, obtain their real name and have some kind of real contact details (like a mobile phone number). On this website, we can choose (for very valid personal reasons) to remain relatively anonymous, but when those contact details are provided, your visiting cuddler has given up their anonymity to you, which is empowering you if you do get a creep turning up. Even better, a prior Skype or FaceTime call further gives you an insight into the personality you are about to cuddle.
Again, for personal reasons, a non-Pro might not be so willing to accept friend requests on this website, or Karma updates, while these are almost the "bread and butter" of the professional cuddler.
So I hope it goes well, and I hope these insights are helpful... The Pros on this website are quite distinct on this website in terms of the reasons they are here, versus the (potential) need for greater anonymity of the non-Pro and the lack of detail they provide.
I think a final tip, in perceiving yourself as a Pro, is always to respond to a message, even if it is to say "no" to us non-Pros. If someone looks like they are becoming a nuisance, a stalker, or a bit creepy , you can always block them. But there are many non-Pros out there who have found it difficult to have a cuddle encounter, so your professionalism in dialogue with us can itself be helpful, even if we live thousands of miles apart any unlikely ever to meet. So, be kind, but I discern from your profile that you already are
Gary
I like a quick phone chat. If they host, I'm ok with a public meet close to their place. Since I have a few Karmas now, I encourage them to read my Karmas. I tell them - I am willing to do whatever makes them feel safe and comfortable.
Thanks for all your input. So far so good.
Only meet in public the first few times with a pro or not no is my biggest suggestion. And never wire money.
I cuddle as a pro. I have met three men to cuddle with - one at his home, one in a local (to me) hotel while he was traveling, and one in my cuddle space. I felt OK about meeting all three of them, because I had personal information about all of them: A name and home address, a name (due to him booking the hotel), and a name and work number (which was easy to vet as legit) that I was able to call and speak with him.
However, I am always afraid to invite a stranger into MY private space without some personal information with which he can easily be identified and "found." Meeting in a public place, or "Skyping," doesn't do it for me (remember Jeffrey Dahmer?). In order to open my door to someone and invite him inside, I need to feel safe, and know WHO he is and how he can be found if he is not a gentleman. I have turned away men due to my need to feel safe. The only way I have come up with that makes ME feel safe is to get a full name and a verifiable home or work address and phone number - not just a cell - where I can phone him and speak to him. I leave that information on a scrap of paper on my desk at home, so if I don't come home that night, his information is there to be found. When I do get home, I rip up the paper and throw it away.
Obviously, there are men who don't want to provide that information, so I have missed out, I am sure, on meeting lots of nice people due to my strict pre-meeting requirements. But I am not willing to risk my well-being for a few dollars and the opportunity for a warm cuddle.
Thoughts?
Please people do not ever give out work info etc. That could ve used for reprisal info etc. Sounds suspicious to me.
No need for reprisal if my cuddler is a gentleman! It's only required to ensure my safety. I have a life, and I don't want any trouble, and I don't want to MAKE any trouble. I only want to know I am safe, and not with someone who is going to rape me or slit my throat. No one HAS to give me any information he doesn't want to. I actually think the only people who might have a problem with it are the ones who I might actually need to be afraid to meet.
We all have to do what we need to do to feel comfortable. Don't want to provide that info? Then don't. But I think that if I had used the information against anyone, CuddleComfort would have heard about it.
@Mark please take note of the user @Kathryn_Filoli. Seems to be suspicious.
Meet in public the first few times. Never wire money or give out info that can be used to steal your identity
Mark knows who I am, @curiousgeorge1. He's never had a problem with me, or a complaint about me. I've been on the site for over a year.
Still people be aware of these kinds of practices. They are not safe!
Neither is letting a stranger into your home! ;o)
Which is why public meetings only for me the first few times. Common sense here people.
Do you know who Jeffrey Dahmer is, curiousgeorge1? He met all his victims in public places before taking them home to kill, dismember, and eat them. Look him up. But hey, if meeting in public is enough for someone to feel safe going home with someone, be my guest. Like I said previously, we all have to do what we need to do to feel safe. If my screening process doesn't work for someone, they are free to move on. No hard feelings!
No one is also ever coming to my home either nor am I going to anothers. So there is that. Be safe is all I am promoting.
And I follow those rules for even meeting people offline. Never going to someones home soon after meeting.
You said, "Be safe is all I am promoting." On that, we agree! ;o)
As a guy somehow people only think the woman has safety concerns, but everyone does and should account for them. That us why I speak up
Public place meet up and quick call are always great. Never WIRE MONEY!! I am usually fine providing a cell number if i am trying to schedule a session. Also the professional cuddlers need to be safe and I usually am happy to answer questions.
@curiousgeorge1 it seems to me that you and @Kathryn_Filoli are making the same point while frustrating each other because there seems to be a communication barrier. You both want to emphasize that each partner needs to take measures to feel and hopefully actually be safe in meeting. As @Kathryn_Filoli acknowledges, she may have lost out on some great cuddle partners because of her rules. I’m sure there are many who would not agree to your multiple public meetings rules (except possibly for professionals to whom you are paying in full for the time.) But, what. works for me might not work for either of you. Each person needs to feel his or her way through this, being safe, feeling secure in that safety, in her or his own way. It is great to offer advice on this issue, but not to argue, “I’m right and your’e wrong,” through a series of repetitive posts. I would suggest that the two you never attempt to set up a cuddle meet between you, and the subject could be closed.
No worries, mickcuddle! I don't think curiousgeorge1 and I would ever be able to meet, because we require different things pre-meeting. I don't think he is wrong, and he didn't come across to me as saying I am wrong. We just have different safety concerns and needs. I am sure he's a great guy, and a great cuddle! No hard feelings - just soft cuddles!
Different people have different levels of comfort when it comes to feeling safe and it is up to everyone to make sure they do everything possible to feel safe and be safe. @Kathryn_Filoli asks what she deems necessary to make sure the clients she meets are on the up and up and I don’t see anything wrong with that. If the prospective client doesn’t want to provide the requested information then he can just move on and look for a cuddler with less meeting requirements, I am sure she is not the only one around in her area and nobody is forcing her clients to give any info if they don’t want to.
@Kathryn_Filoli if you read discussion “ let’s talk about asking for ID’s “ you find that I’m the only one out there willing to show their ID , or , at least say it on the forum . There are those who might consider that reckless , but , I made it this far. If you need a client let me know I’ll request to book. In the meantime happy cuddles.
I always ask for their name a picture of them. I also converse with them for a while to make sure they know what this is and I make my boundaries very clear right away. Some just ghost me when I make it clear I'm not giving any sexual touches. I always make sure I Google their address if I'm doing an outcall too.