If someone bought me a button like that, I would totally wear it. ? Wouldn’t stop other people from trying to ‘organize’ me, though.
Ooh, what a nice thread.
Re: Asexuality To me, it feels something like being a straight man in a world without women—wherever I look, there's no one I'm attracted to that way.
Re: Gender I suggest checking out the Genderbread Person (it's excellent).
As far as @pmvines's question goes: a boy can have a female body and like wearing female things, and still be a boy—just the same way he could if he was a boy, had a male body, and liked wearing female things. Because let's face it: skirts are comfortable and nail polish is rad, and wearing them doesn't make you a girl (though it might make people think some weird things).
[Note: Mouse over the links in the paragraph above to see how I'm using each highlighted word. Or follow the links to the genderbread website, where you can read the definitions for yourself; whichever works best with your tech.]
Re: Buttons Wouldn't it be nice if that worked? I would wear my button constantly.
Regards: Asexuality The original question I believe was why does Asexuality need to be defined as a separate sexuality rather than an individual just 'not being very interested in sex'. I believe I might have an interesting perspective. I am a lesbian who is not very interested in sex. I'm not asexual, despite fitting OPs definition.
Asexuality fits very neatly into our understanding of sexual attraction. If you simplify it down, a woman who is attracted to women but not men is a lesbian, a woman who is attracted to men and not women is straight, a woman who is attracted to both men and women is bisexual and a woman who is not attracted to men or women is asexual (this is reductionist as it ignores the spectrum of gender and sexuality but you get the idea).
Asexuality, of all the less recognised sexualities, should be the easiest one for people to accept - the fact that there is still this question shows how much sex is ingrained into our society.
Asexuality has been mistaken (by the OP and by people in general) as not being into sex, as low sex drive, sex repulsion, shyness ect and as such has been seen as something that could potentially be 'fixed'. This is no less horrible than saying homosexuality could be fixed.
This is also why asexuals belong and should have a voice in LGBT+ spaces, because the silencing and erasure of their identity is phobic behaviour.
Edit: I did some edits.
[Testing, I'll respond soon...] My response is complete.
Right, I had trouble editing, as well so, I was delayed, as I did a quick search to find contradictory* information than the one I'd had before on this point. In that maybe dysphoria doesn't even have to be there. Though, more research on my part I got to do.
[Took me long enough to type that I did not see your point redaction until posting, because the page didn't automatically update, but I'll leave my comment intact rather than rewrite it.] The trans community has been leaning heavily towards demedicalization of the term. People don't just wake up and decide to call themselves some random other gender on a whim. There generally is some degree of dysphoria, but the process of feeling and identifying it is vague and complicated enough that it's easier and simpler to just go by matter of identity. For some, that dysphoria may be very low, may only appear on occasion, and may only be social dysphoria rather than physical. For a long time, dysphoria was focused on, and that resulted in a lot of trans people feeling lost, because cis people were framing things as 'trans => extreme body dysphoria'. Someone who only experiences low levels of social dysphoria may have it even be so low that it's not felt as any sort of discontent, but rather they feel the distinction in terms of gender euphoria (opposite of dysphoria) when recognized and called by their actual gender. If someone has depression, which many do, it can be incredibly difficult to suss out a low level of social dysphoria, but they can still feel and identify 'gender euphoria'.>!
Alright, interesting.
!
Why do you think it's "quite a danger" for someone to determine that they are experiencing gender dysphoria rather than paying someone else to say they are?
I say it's quite dangerous... I should have said "it can be quite dangerous". The reasons are: when someone is getting surgeries for example, or anything that alters their body causing them infertility, etc. possible loss of certain bodily functions, as well. I think that speaking with an expert on the subject can be of help because there is also the potential for one to simply be a cross dresser, edit: gay, etc. and think "they have to change their sex in order to dress in such manner, love the same sex, etc." Or maybe someone has been abused especially, at a young age, and thus, wants to change themselves for that reason, edit: though, they might Edit: NOT* end of edit. know some of these underlying factors, and just think: "I must be trans." Though, speaking with someone who understands a lot about* these matters can be of help in better understanding, and possibly trying other routes: that may be more suitble for that person. Though, if it ultimately comes down to that* they have hormones, surgeries, etc. than it is what it is, and I'd hope they'll be well with it.
You can't know what chromosomes a person has unless they've had them tested and they tell you the test results. Also, there is a difference between sex (female, male, intersex) and gender (woman, man, non-binary).
I can't know. Though, doesn't change the fact that they likely have either a male, or female sex chromosomes* as their body also aligns with that. Though, like I said, there are many factors that add up: voice, appearance, chest, below chest appearance, etc. If someone: looks, sounds, dresses, etc. typically male, or female then I'll think they are that which they look, sound, and present. Also most men are stronger than women, taller, broader bodies, edit: some have* beards, etc. So, one, or the other does not make one a man, or not. Though, many of these things do add up in presenting a man, as a man for example.
Why is it that you won't respect a person's gender identity unless they've visibly transitioned a certain distance? You don't know their stories. Maybe they still present as their assigned birth gender because they aren't able to transition.
Someone has the freedom to present themselves* however, they want as long as it's acceptable for the public, and for any* children around. Though, I have the freedom to choose my words, and thoughts* as well. Like I said, I am open to the exceptions I previously gave. As well as to refer to the person by their name instead. Though, I'll not deny all that I can, see, and hear, and call someone what they do not present as. I get that people can have all kinds of difficulties, and circumstances. That doesn't change the fact that they do not present as this, or that. Or even ambiguous*.
For example, if someone has a high fever, and they are coughing so much, etc. them not having access to medical treatment, or at least not masking the fever/etc. so they look healthy: means, I will not say a person in that, or the other situation that they are "healthy." Or male/female when they do not present as what they say they are. For example, they want to be refered to as male, when so much about them says, I present as female: their voice, chest, dress [that of typically female], long hair, feminine face, height, strength, etc. all adds up. Now this take may upset them, that I'll refer to them as their name as opposed to "she" for example. Though, it is what it is. I try to compromise with my views, and personal comfort.
@pmvines March 13 Flag
Alright!
@Lovelight mu son is ok with it, he has no issues but he also is in a welcoming environment and has gay and trans friends so nothing new really.
@CosmicCreeprs yes many of what you said is on point, except a correction: it is important to specify what attraction is lacking. One could Edit: still have various other attractions though, not sexually. end of edit.
You: "... and a woman who is not attracted to men or women is asexual..." ^^
So my correction is: Asexuality is a lack of sexual attraction.
Also, perhaps to correct myself on something I might have said wrong: "A lack of sexual attraction > to others" I don't think is accurate, either. Anywhere I said that here, I'd redact. Reason is, I think there is another sexuality in which one is sexually attracted to themselves. Possibly: "Autosexual." Which, I barely looked into. Though, the definition I gave for Asexuality does as far as I know give a clear, and accurate understanding of what Asexuality is.
Now if someone wants to understand more about Asexuality, or has questions, the responses, you @CosmicCreeprs, myself, and many others gave can be of much help in answering FAQs about: Asexuality. As well as the Asexual links provided. It really is not understood, and hopefully the more we talk about here, there, share good contents about, the more we can help others understand. There are also at times misrepresentatins, and misinformation which nobody is perfect. Though, it is always best to continue learning, and checkout a range of resources, especially, as much of a credible resources one can find. As well as talk with others who are that whenever there is an opportunity.
Anecdotal "evidence ", speculation, politics from the left side of the classroom , and popular theories from last month, all make interesting reading.
Well, @Esquire, whether you're a lawyer or a men's magazine (or somehow both); glad you're enjoying the thread, too.
Glad to see people enjoying the thread. If anybody else has a topic of interest please post, just keep things civil!
NEWSFLASH: Older Caucasian man has a low opinion of those who aren’t in his immediate social circle. More at eleven!
Oh, I can jump on that one. Older Caucasian male, starts private messages saying how much they agree with a person then promptly blocks you when apparently you aren't as agreeable privately as they'd like.
Really guys?? You all know who you are. If you don't like what a person has to say just don't reach out to begin with. Seriously.
I've now had two more "Men" block me because of my professionals deactivating comments. Grow up.
Besides, what exactly does blocking accomplish on this site? That is something that has been addressed on these forums before. The ability to block someone and the total lack of affect it has on the site in general. I can still see your forum posts, you can still respond to my forum posts. We aren't friends, so just stop talking to me don't block me. You have no pictures on your profiles except the one if even that.
So private messaging a person then blocking them so they can't respond? Does that give you a sense of power? Maybe an 'I'm better than you' feel? You come to MY profile, especially when I haven't been on the site for a few days; spew a few 5 dollar words then block me? If you have an opinion put it on the forum that prompted you to respond to a person. Call them out on the thread, don't clog up their personal pages with your childish behaviors.
Older Caucasian males, and one Black Man demonstrating their immaturity if you ask me.
Agreed with @hogboblin.
New Post:
Which is the best: Android, Or iPhone? Why? ?
Oh, I know this one! Android's best, because both Data and Lore are super cool in Star Trek, and Captain Picard never uses an iPhone.
[In case you couldn't tell, I've got a old flip phone.]
I have never had an iphone only android. I also do the family mobile plan, 63 a mo for me and my son unlimited text, talk, and data. Not too many bells and whistles but all i ever do on it is talk and text, and sometimes go online but typically use my laptop for that.
I suspect that—as with just about every issue of comparison—the important question is "which is the best for what?"
Carrier pigeons.
@hogboblin agreed.
@DarrenWalker I only saw glimpses of Star Wars. lol. What kind of Flip phone you have?
Well, it's for everyone to figure out for themselves, and write which is best, and what for.
@pmvines cool. Seems like a decent plan. I just recently joined the iPhone "World." It's not too bad, still getting used to it.
@hogboblin lol. They are pretty cool. ?
I'd say: Android phones are best because I love their: affordability, sturdy feel, and variety in styles. As well as their UI, and UX.
@DarrenWalker Neither an attorney or a magazine, But I cuddled at a Holiday Inn Express.
@hogboblin Gotta love those labels. If only they were productive. What's a quasi sexual elder cis-Male with olive skin called?
@Esquire
Coming up with a concise label for you would be easier if you asked for a means of describing how you act. Loads already exist, conveniently enough, but none would be permissible here on the forums.
Good luck with your increasingly obsolete world view, buddy.
@Lovelight: This kind. So old it's been discontinued! But it works fine for texting and calls, and only costs me $20 a month. Smart phones? Ha! I'm more the carrier pigeon type....
@Esquire: Does Holiday Inn Express staff call customers "esquire," or something? (That'd be cool.)
@hogboblin Interesting, coming from a person who espouses "emulating a corpse " as the preferred way to cuddle. Have you ever had a real world relationship, or are you an AI creation in this virtual world?
Time to turn the lights out on this thread too.
@DarrenWalker No, they just call me Sir
I converted my computing to Apple 7 or 8 years ago. The way iPhone and iPad share data with Mac as well as photos and contacts made me an iPhone guy. For phone calls and texting I don’t think there’s a diddle of difference.
@Esquire: [laugh] Believe it or not, @hogboblin's in an actual, non-artificial-intelligence relationship with me—and I approve the "emulating a corpse" method. Nice and poseable. Anyway; if they just call you "sir" at the Holiday Inn Express, then where does the "esquire" come in?
@mickcuddle: I figured the smartphone thing was less about calling and texting, and more about the fancy extras. Hmm. Those extras do seem nice....
@DarrenWalker Have you seen the variety of user names in this thread alone? If Darren Walker is the name on your birth certificate, you are a rare member.
PS. It's Sir with a capital S
@Esquire: I was just wondering what made you decide on that username. "Esquire" is a common title for a lawyer, also the name of a men's magazine—but no, you said, you've cuddled at a Holiday Inn Express. Weird connection! ...Where is it?
P.S. You can hear the capitals used by the staff at Holiday Inn Express? Impressive.
@DarrenWalker your disclosure of your relationship with Hobgoblin answers all the questions I ever had while passing through this thread.
@Esquire: I don't see how that's possible, since I never said what kind of relationship it was.
Edit: I mean, I'm an aro ace. I don't really look at relationships the normal way. I consider myself "in a relationship" with my mother, for Pete's sake—a parent/child relationship. Doesn't really answer a lot of questions, my use of the phrase "in a relationship." All it tells you is that I know the guy (and, in this case, like cuddling).
NEW TOPIC
do hybrids really help the environment?
I know they use less gas. But does that equate to much at all in terms of helping? You still have to charge them which uses electricity, which uses up natural resources to create that. Also, though they use less, they still actually do use gas. I am all for leaving less of a footprint so every little bit counts for the good of the whole. So i realize hynrids help, question i pose is how much, and is it enough to make am impact, or is it more of a feel good thing we like to look at to make us feel as though we are making a difference?