The mind of a professional cuddler

cuddlenow69cuddlenow69
edited April 2019 in General

Hi Cuddle Comfort people
I thought this over and I need answers. If you are a professional, are you friends with your customer as long as a customer gives you money for your services? Do you feel if a friendship is happening that you treat this person as a genuine friend if you never met this person otherwise? I read build a friendship through cuddling. It sounds to good to be true.

Comments

  • cuddlenow69cuddlenow69
    edited April 2019

    I meant to ask would you as a pro be a true friend if you never meet this person on Cuddle Comfort. Clients and enthusiasts you are welcome to answer

  • [Deleted User]chococuddles (deleted user)

    I'm a Cuddle Comfort peoples? YIPPPEEEEE!

    This is probably best suited for the Pro Cuddling forum. (yeah I'm "that guy" tonight)

    As an enthusiast I'm not 100% sure what the fudge you're asking.

    If I didn't meet them on this site would I still be a true friend?

    My brain hurts.

  • cuddlenow69cuddlenow69

    @chococuddles. You are right. I am asking from a customer's point of view. I was thinking if the pro is being real or just nice for the cash. I just joined last week. Just testing things

  • garrablancagarrablanca
    edited April 2019

    Mmmh could one be friend of the barber / stylist?
    Or have a friendship with the mechanic that fix your car?

    I think yes you can start a friendship with a pro, but that doesn't mean you are going to stop paying for the service.

    But yes anyone can start a friendship with Pros, it is possible.

  • respectfulrespectful

    I think it very much depends on the person. One particular professional has seen me as a friend from the very beginning, which is really nice; another one keeps a bit of distance.

    Here is a related thread.

  • MikeinDavisMikeinDavis

    I'm friends with a few waitress at a diner I'm a regular at. We follow each other on IG and Snapchat. We have pretty deep conversations, often past closing. I often walk them to their cars (sketchy parking lot).

    HOWEVER, I realize that being nice to me is their job. So I never abuse that kindness. I tip 30%. I don't distract them when they're busy. And despite them saying they REALLY don't mind me staying after closing, I'm trying to stop doing that.

    Anyone in the service industry (wait staff, pro cuddlers, stylists, masseuses) is required to be nice to customers. Do they enjoy some more than others? Yes. Can they form friendships? Of course. But as the customer, always remember it's a job for them.  If they're super friendly with you, appreciate the heck out of it, but never abuse it or overstep bounds. And make it easy for them to set boundaries.

    Just my two cents...

  • cuddliestflowercuddliestflower

    New pro here if one of the people I cuddled asked to just grab lunch and hang out I totally would they've all been super awsome individuals that I genuinely enjoyed spending time with

  • TransGirlTransGirl

    As a pro cuddler I can say that it is possible to form a friendship with a person who has paid me to cuddle with them. I continue to be a correspondent with a gentleman who is a remarkable and wonderful person. I would be glad to go out to dinner with him.

    Although I provide a service where I am reimbursed for my time and my skills, the business relationship can still continue if a bond of friendship forms.

    For example, I am friends with my dental hygienist, but I still pay the lovely woman for her expertise and craft. ♥️

  • CatloafCatloaf

    It's possible, but the one time I did it it crossed professional lines.

    I had this happen a couple years ago with one of my early clients. By mutual consensus, it turned into a rather... "more than friends, but not dating" type scenario over the couple months we got to know each other. My husband knew about it, as we were in an open relationship at the time and not actually married yet (we're no longer open - I've decided that my "primary" is now my "only"). He was a lonely, awkward guy or so it seemed, and we had a few interests in common. After he paid for a few sessions, I was going to his place by my own volition and I no longer felt like charging him because I liked him so much, and he was way too much of a people pleaser. I'm not paid to be a friend. I'm paid to be a professional, after all. We were hanging out a few times a week. It was fun - we watched anime, we went to the arcade, and one time when I got too drunk he took good care of me or so I'm told (I blacked out, apparently).

    Once the friendship got deep, the mask fell off so to speak.

    There were certain things he was saying that really tipped me off that maybe he wasn't a safe person to be around. I didn't know about these things till weeks into our "friendship"... he mentioned one day point blank out of no where that he wanted to try and coerce a different cuddler (whom he claimed he didn't like) into sex. I was so stunned that someone could say something so heinous that I didn't say anything. Then, one time when we went to the grocery store and he got rather flirtatious with a clerk there, almost using me to make her jealous, he mentioned having nudes of her on his computer which he showed me. Again, I was shocked. Then he mentioned having rape fantasy one night and this scared me. I think that was the last straw that broke the camel's back, and I decided he was not the person I thought he was.

    So there. I let a professional boundary down, and I made friends with someone who ended up causing me anxiety and emotional pain. Will I ever attempt to be friends with a client again? No, I don't think so. Though I will treat them kindly and courteously, without letting them into my personal life. It's one thing to be friends with someone who is a professional cuddler - it's entirely a different thing to get to know some of the people you're cuddling with, take it out into the "real world" and discover later that there are traits about them you needed to leave to them and them alone.

  • [Deleted User]chococuddles (deleted user)

    Don't count on it.

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