@UKGuy: In my opinion, the difference between manliness and womanliness has less to do with character traits and behavior, and more to do with interpretation.
When I was a kid, I had long hair, sometimes wore nail polish, jumped fences, fought other kids, got in trouble for stealing stuff out of ladies' purses at church (usually candy), did knitting, read a lot, collected knives, etc. As anyone who knows me now might expect, I was pretty androgynous as a kid, too.
When people thought I was a boy, they also thought I was kind of sissy.
When people thought I was a girl, they also thought I was wildly tomboyish.
The main difference here is that 'sissy' is pretty much always an insult, while 'tomboy' usually isn't. It's not so much that women are accepted for whatever they are (while men have to fit into the Man box) as it is that the Woman box is generally acknowledged to be lesser than the Man box. Women are lesser, so it's good for them to hang out in their box, and (mostly) praiseworthy when they step out and up into the Man box. Men are greater, so staying in the Man box is the best thing possible for them, and it's (usually) disgusting when they step out and down into the Female box.
Of course there are exceptions—e.g., a man who's good with kids is basically a saint, a woman who doesn't want to settle down and start a family is selfish and cold, and so on—but mostly a woman who's seen as being more manly is 'strong' and 'brave', while a man who's seen as being more womanly is 'weak' and 'sissy'.
The way the traits themselves are expressed doesn't necessarily change. For example, me: when my coworkers think I'm male, they say I'm a reliable, take-charge kind of a guy. When I'm seen as female, I'm a bossy b-word.
I swear I'm the same person doing the same things no matter who's looking at me.
Usually, I can't stomach a long post, and often DW's posts at any length, but this is clear and makes a point.
I am now looking skyward for flying piggies. LOL
When I play Zelda: Breath of the Wild I run around as a pretty, blue-eyed, blonde-haired twink.
But today I shot a boar with my bow and arrow and ate the meat raw.
Manly > Masculine > Macho.
@DarrenWalker man you really have nothing to do, you love writing long essay
@Navyman1010 And you clearly have nothing to do other than comment on it. I use the word comment rather than respond because to respond to something you would have to have been asked for your input.....
@Navyman1010
Believe it or not, some people place value on thinking, and expressing themselves in a clear and descriptive manner.
Also: have you considered, you know, ignoring the “long essay”, or at the very least not wasting your time commenting on them?
Popping in to check CC between shifts.
The implication that people only love writing long essays if they have nothing to do is an odd one, @Navyman1010. I'd be willing to wager a few odds and ends that some people (like you, maybe) wouldn't enjoy writing essays even if they had absolutely nothing else to do. Whereas I like writing them even when I don't really have the time.
It's lucky for my offline life that I can type so fast.
On topic:
Manliness as it relates to cuddling... Being a gentleman who is confident enough to communicate clearly, respect boundaries, and realising that affection does not need to lead to sex, and sex does not need to be married to cuddling or close physical contact. Being able to be "man enough" to realise your inner wants and needs, and sometimes that the need is to be the "little spoon"! Before I moved cities to help take care of my stepdad, hubby and I always had a cuddle every night before sleep. The first few years of our relationship he was usually the one holding me. For the last 3ish years when we started living together, he would ask if we could switch it up and he would be the one being held. That turned into me falling asleep that way every single night. And now that we're not living in the same city anymore, I usually have to replace him with my body pillow but it doesn't compare. He's the kind of guy who is quiet and was raised by women, very intuitive and in touch with his feminine side, but still loves doing his "guy things". Cuddling is totally a manly thing if manly men realise that softening themselves up doesn't equate to emasculation. For my husband, whenever he holds me, I think he feels like he's taken on the role of both protector and caregiver, which typically are regarded as masculine and feminine labels, respectively.
Is a protector not a caregiver, and vice versa? If only we could realise that the qualities of being "manly"' or "womanly" actually intertwine and overlap in many circumstances...
Off-topic:
I really don't get this "essay" thing. I only assume people who say that kind of stuff must really not like reading, or the person who types longer posts. What's so wrong or detestible about communicating your thoughts clearly and in multiple parts? For those of us who actually are aware of what a real essay is and actually like to read something more than a one-line jab, a post that's a couple paragraphs long at most is a quick trip to the mailbox versus a long walk in the park. You have nothing to lose by fully articulating your position in an argument or discourse. That's how discussions are supposed to work. His post is 1839 characters, not words. Hardly even a page of a novel. That's roughly 3 1/2 YouTube comments (at least comparable to when YouTube had character limits...)
It is so cute how @Navyman1010 (cf "I only like genderless [du jour topic]" or "I would never cuddle another man!") trolls and follows @DarrenWalker around the forums.
Beyond manliness, I do think @DarrenWalker and his great writing, self-knowledge, and equinamity are the definition of bravery. He knows himself, and how or why that threatens others is their shit to deal with and handle. Preferably in the privacy of their own misery and silence.
Well some of us that follow @DarrenWalker around the forums just like the unique input, and eloquent expression. Even though we still wouldn’t cuddle a man ??♂️ @Sideon. I know that wasn’t directed at me, but i felt left out i guess.
@pmvines, @Hogboblin, @Catloaf, @Sideon, @BashfulLoner: I feel so appreciated right now. Grinning and turning bright red aren't exactly associated with equanimity, but with skin as pale as mine the tomato-ing can't really be helped. Great job: you've de-Spocked me.
Temporarily!
[laugh] Thanks, guys. I like you too.