@chococuddles I second that!
I don't really want to go into too many details. I was given the advice to be patient, write a detailed bio, have a clear profile picture and post a picture of myself outside, which I have done and yet I get the same result. Is there something wrong with my profile? ??♂️
@iwrotetoyou ok... they deleted their account, and their comment barely, if any has anything to do with the topic.
Everybody hates a racist, but a racist only hates a few people. Solid logic lol
@Cathyinmidtown you come across like you have some self-hate issues.
@Kense I do not believe she hates herself, it is just her opinion. Another common misconception white people engage in—that all black people must hold the same opinion.
@FunCartel it’s not about her having a different opinion, what she said was specifically about a group of people she is part of. She said black men feel away because momma taught them, she is speaking directly from a place showing contempt gift both men and women in the black community saying try all have the same experience and thought. She definitely had a self image issue and is outwardly attacking black people while defending her silly position.
@BashfulLoner I don't know what comment is being referred to. Though, anyone that says what you just said was said* is terrible for saying so. Black men aren't from the same parents*, and same walk of life. It's racist to put them into such box.
There was a comment earlier by @Cathyinmidtown town i was referring too. It had been defended several times, i think they are missing a large aspect of what is problematic about the statement.
@BashfulLoner alright. I'd need to search the comment from PC, and I barely use the site from it. Thanks for telling me.
@ Fun Cartel, any person that "ONLY" dates one group of person then immediately bashes the group they are apart of is suspect and self-hating. To ONLY date White men then immediately turn around and trash Black men which your father is, is very typical those types.
Also, I'm Black so I'm not sure what the second part of your sentence has to do with anything.
@ Lovelight a Black person can't be "racist" to another Black person LOL.
MOD Edit: Removed personal attack. [SoulcuddlerZ]
@Kense yes, they can. It’s also referred to as “internalized racism” which is still racism.
Mmmm, I do not know for certain if it is self hate or racism in cathy’s Case. I would have to talk to her more. White people embarrass the hell out of themselves but I do not hate myself for being white nor do I hate white people. I think when someone offers an opinion on a forum it is too easy to quickly label someone. I have been guilty of that. Who hasn’t?
That’s a fair statement @FunCartel but it misses the negative part of the statement that is also harmful and hateful. Opinion and experience are one thing but false generalizations are another. They are usually rooted in some sort of “ism”. And that being directed at ones self is in my option self hate.
@BashfulLoner well the same way @Cathyinmidtown is speaking about Black men, is being spoken about Black women. I am not sure if you are well aware of that @Cathyinmidtown, and what your thoughts are about that?
It isn’t right, and it’s not just “an opinion“ when someone labels a whole group of people based on their race, and sex as being less. Then blaming their moms for that. EDIT: A lot of horrible things people say, they try to hide it under “just saying” “just my opinion” etc. Doesn’t make it any less absurd, and horrible. As such I’ll address it accordingly. end of edit.
Can’t we all just get along?
Sure we can, i for one am not invested in the conversation enough to be angry. I just try to offer my perspective.
@HugsAndAttitude unfortunately, we can’t all “get along.” It is what it is. I can’t get along with racism, etc. Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t carry on with my life, and with those who are respectful of others no matter their race/sex, etc. ?
MOD: Comment Removed. Personal attack [SoulcuddlerZ]
@leftyrighty i don’t think he @fincartel intended to do that, i agree privilege clouds his perspective but i truly don’t think he meant to be malicious. But the post we’ve Ben discussing was really based in ignorance and the reaction she receive from voicing that ignorance over time. It’s like a nurture type of ideology that she has.
Making up terms now LOL internalized racism ? WTF. Hating your own race is self hate not racism. The very definition of Racism is feeling your race is superior and using the power associated with it to oppress. So please tell us how Blacks feel Superior to Blacks?
People from our own race can be just as hateful as the "Joe" or "Jill" next door. They can bring us down, and say/do the most hateful things to us. The same with other 'minorities'. So, I'll not give someone a light pass on trash like that just because they are from the same race as they are talking trash about. Or because they are 'minorities' etc. You talk trash, you are of little to no different to me than whatever race has the most power/etc., doing the same. Someone who commits injustices, and one who supports them in it, are pretty much two sides of the same coin to me. With exceptions aside. What matters to me is people's honesty, and kindness to themselves, and to one another.
Quit hating yourselves no matter your race, and really stop hating one another based on their* race. Just because of the media, and your personal experiences of a certain race/ hasn't been that good: doesn't speak for everyone in said group. To think so, is absurd, and hateful. Get to know others for their character, and don't base their trashy, or good behavior on their race. Though, on who they simply are as a person!
It's that simple. I wish some could get that through their minds, and ourcome their judgemental ways.
Instead of talking trash about your race (whatever it may be): Why not actually uplift yourself, and the people in your community? If you can't do that, then at least stop casting a giant brush of one size fits all on everyone in that race/culture. It's utterly absurd, and hateful. Our color/race does not determine our behavior!
I don't know what it is like to experience racism, or to be something other than white, so I don't really have any insight to add to somebody who does.
@Kense since you just wanna "laugh out loud" it seems you are not interested in hearing what I've to say, and seem more interested in telling me that I don't know what I am talking about.
Internalized racism is real. I suggest you educate yourself on it.
I wish to not continue with you unless you are actually interested in a respectful discussion.
It's one thing to disagree. It's another to try and make mockery about what I've to say. The latter I don't accept.
The term 'internalized racism' does exist ; a psycholological term usually for when black people (minorities)also experience, uphold or behave in the same negative ways their group are treated. Common examples in black communities are colorism, texturism etc. So I can see where u r coming from @Lovelight.
I also appreciate that the idea of black people being racist is also debatable, depending on which definition of racism you hold.(One relating to power or treating people differently & discriminating them because of their different race etc).
Couldn't help wondering if this is part of the disagreement btw @Kense & @lovelight?
The term 'self hate' seems more apt to me too & I wonder if it can be used interchangeably with 'internalised racism' here?
As for the actual comment about black men- hmm it was not only provocative but ignorant. Made me wonder the person's experiences that lead to such a sweeping FALSE statement that unfortunately not uncommon. My initial reaction was to ignore it as it seemed too deliberately provocative as much as I don't want to dismiss the offence it caused.
Well, the problem of racism will never be solved on a thread on a Cuddle site, but ever since my planet blew up and I was raised by a farming couple in Kansas I have always thought it best to address problems like this face-to-face. So I will retreat to my Fortress of Solitude where I will contemplate, read and wipe until the final flush.
@4cuddles Racism is one of those definitions people tend to cherry pick but it inherently has to do with the systemic imbalance of power and privilege, whereas disliking or even hating someone though is a common thread in racism does not define racism. It is merely prejudice. An example of racism for example would be lack of funding for schools in majority black/minority area, thereby meaning a lack of tech, lack of supplies, lack of up to date textbooks, and lack of decent salaries to attract some of the more experienced, credentialed teachers. Nary a second thought goes into liking or disliking another person, and there is rarely anything malicious or purposeful to it. However it is a product of racism in perhaps it's most common and purest form, and by design places a population at a disadvantage of opportunity. It is that way simply because it is, and always has been. Difference between that and prejudice against someone due to their skin color, which is usually something based on opinion, or a superficial trait such as dialect, music, hair, dress, etc. Or something brought on through years of stereotype and inequality.
I just posted that I have nothing to really add to the topic due to only knowing what it is like to be white and there I go being tangential. End of tangent. Carry on....
@4cuddles I hold quite a broad definition of racism. In which, it includes various types, and levels: all of which are worth talking about/learning, and striving to overcome. One of them includes talking trash about people based on their race. Furthermore, denying them access to equal opportunities/etc., (simply based on one's race) is also racism. Which the later I'd say often if not all the times, does happen as a result of the former.
Most times, people don't just rise to power one day, and think "I gotta start being racist now." Pretty sure for many it's some thing that has been in the making starting with the average joe, Jil, Sam, etc. Then, as they get to higher positions, they'd have the power to inflict more harm: not just through their words. Though, through actions, as well.
Starting with the line of reasoning an unnamed political party uses: for example, if a group of White teens/ commit horrible things against a Black teen/ especially, as they utter racist things: that would (and should) be labeled hate crime. Where as the races reversed, and I find major media's, people on said side talking about "the teens not being raised right, not having a good home life, etc." It's not far fetched from saying: "we can't label that verbal/physical assault because the person who did that "their group" is not in power." To me, that's simply a way for some politicians to go after power make big bucks, and give a wrist slap to those "on their side." So, I do not hold such limited, and rather damaging definitions of racism. Somebody who does something atrocious does not deserve to get less dealings simply based on their race. Otherwise, it'd be going into racism.
Said party would say anything under the sun, apart from calling it what it is: hate crime. So, the definition I follow on racism extends to issues like these, as well.
Along with addressing "internalized racism" etc., which I don't take lightly, either. Attack on someone be it verbal/physical based on their race is: racism. No matter what power said person (or their group) have in society. Nor what race they are.