Somnus Wept, Or, Cuddling and Sleep Disorders

Greetings, friends and enemies. I'm dealing with a bout of insomnia at present. That, in itself, isn't too unusual; most of my posts on this forum have been thought up while I rolled around in bed, desperate for the death-like solace of dreamless sleep.

I'm curious, dear reader: do you suffer from any sleep disorders, or less severe somnolent complications? What effect does cuddling have on you? Does it make sleep easier? Or, perhaps, you've grown dependent on cuddling for a restful night? Maybe you're familiar with sleepwalking?

As for myself, I'm not very good at sleep. Aside from the above-mentioned insomnia, I've dealt with sleep paralysis, night terrors, and I am prone (according to a partner) to sobbing whilst unconscious.

The very worst thing, in my opinion, is contending with insomnia while cuddling with someone. There I am, in a darkened room, entangled with another human. I hear them breathing gently, feel the rise and fall of their chest, and they've got an arm wrapped around me. Thirty minutes pass, and I can't help but to focus on their inhalations and exhalations; they seem nearly mechanical in their regularity. The weight of their body, even if they don't weigh much at all, becomes an unbearable burden—I swear that our bones are grinding together.

An hour passes. I try to remove myself from their clutches, as the desire to scream in horror at being trapped is becoming too great. The living prison responds to my attempt at exfiltration; they tighten their grip on my arm, or nuzzle their head against my chest. I want to pull away in dramatic fashion, to leap from the bed or couch or spot on the floor, shrieking in both revulsion and relief.

"Where are you going?"

I stop my escape abruptly. "Nowhere," I say, as gently as I can. Surely, they can notice how tense my body is—how I had to force out that single word, as if it were some horrible curse?

The process repeats itself until I'm able to sneak away. It is agony.

Comments

  • @hogboblin I suffer from Obstructive Sleep Apnea and have slept with the aid of CPAP machine and mask for over 20 years. Couple that with an inability to get to sleep easily both initially, and after any interruption to my sleep, and I’m just not a good sleeper, never have been since childhood. Once or twice a month I’ll have a night where I don’t sleep at all.

    Interesting, to me at least, is that I find it easy to fall asleep while cuddling. Of course I’m not wearing the CPAP gear, so if my cuddle partner doesn’t wake me, whether by intention or not, I will eventually snore loudly enough to awaken myself.

  • I have insomnia very often. On my own I sleep when I randomly pass out, and I don't sleep for long. It's not much of an issue for me though. I get a lot of work done during night hours! It's a wonderfully productive time when everything is still and silent. Cuddling makes me very sleepy with some/most people. I have occassionally been stuck while another person sleeps and I am dying to move around and do things. That's improved with age though.

  • LOL @RaindropSweetie I’m not laughing with your plight, but I was drawn to look at your profile when you’d said it improved with age. You’re less than half my age, in my experience it’s a roller coaster where it gets better and not so much over the years. My wish for you is that in continues to get better as you pass the years.

  • Hogboblin...I mean this in the most gentle way possible have you considered that cuddling isn't for you? It is supposed to soothe you to sleep. It sounds like it's not...there's plenty of sleep medicine natural & otherwise

  • Though @hogboblin is not entirely serious with his post , I do def understand that feeling lol. I do a good deal of overnights as many of my cuddle pals are out of town, and it just makes more sense to do that if we are driving a couple hrs to hang out . I do reach a point where I want to turn away to my side of the bed and get comfortable, as well as cool , and that's not easy to do when cuddling . Also am not super touchy in mornings , sort of need some time and space to wake up , scratch , and orient myself

  • @hobgoblin Is medicinal marijuana legal in your state? You could get a script and indulge in some Indica.

  • [Deleted User]DarrenWalker (deleted user)

    @hogboblin: "Living prison." Ha.

    I like it.

  • edited July 2019

    @mickcuddle

    I had no idea what a CPAP machine was. Thank you for sharing your perspective; it was intriguing, in a grim sort of way.

    @RaindropSweetie

    I greatly prefer night myself—the stillness and silence is delightful. I don’t care for warm weather/bright light, so dealing with insomnia during the day, during summer, is uniquely awful for me.

    @casueno

    Most mammals benefit from touch. So, by default, cuddling is for me. Technically. It’s complicated.

    @pmvines

    I was being 100% serious.

    @FunCartel

    Medical marijuana is available in North Dakota, it seems. I dislike the idea of jumping through hoops to get the devil’s lettuce, though.

  • @hogboblin i think cuddling helps with only some types of insomnia. if said insomnia is caused by certain types of anxiety, i think cuddling can be very helpful. if caused by something like a medication (just an example), no amount of cuddling will help. i could absolutely see how cuddling with a sleeping person while dealing with insomnia would be absolute torture.

    I am a night owl by nature, but i love sleep. it is one of my very favorite things about being alive. when i was suffering from insomnia, i thought i was going to go insane. if somebody had been cuddled up to me sleeping soundly while i longed for sleep, I would've lost my mind. I cannot sleep while being cuddled, I need space. my husband knows this, if i agreed to overnight cuddles, i would have to let that person know, that once they are snoozing, i will have to move so that i can get some shut eye too. likely best that i do not offer over nights in my services, i suppose!

    people are complicated and there endless variables to what helps us get through life as best we can. i think of it kind of like we are all jigsaw puzzles baring the same image, but it is a different configuration of pieces to put it together.

  • @hogboblin Well shoot. I have stock in marijuana.

  • [Deleted User]Snuggles22 (deleted user)

    @hogboblin I keep reading your username as "hoboglobin" lol. Anywayyyyy, I'm pretty sure I have undiagnosed narcolepsy, life has always been challenging because I can't stay awake for anything. I slip into sleep almost every time I have a cuddle session, even if it's an hour or two long, I just play it off and make sure that I'm in a good cuddle position. I usually switch up positions often to avoid falling asleep.

  • @Snuggles22

    This was a point of view that I wasn’t expecting. It has made me rethink my desire to sleep through most things; I’m sure that the reality of it is beyond troublesome. Thank you for contributing to the thread!

  • [Deleted User]Snuggles22 (deleted user)

    @hogboblin anytime

  • [Deleted User]mdx71 (deleted user)

    I have trouble sleeping, and have almost all my life. Don't know if it's insomnia, cuddling can help sorts of sooth you and get in a sleepy mood but what I like best is L-tryptophan . It's the same amino acid that is in turkey that makes you sleepy. It helps the body produce melotonin and serotonin.. I also wear blue light blocking glasses sometimes. Blue light messes with your sleeping patterns.

  • edited July 2019

    @mdx71 Careful where that L-tryptophan comes from. There was a company in Japan a few years ago that made over half of the world’s supply of it and several people died or were left in a vegetative state because it was tainted from improper manufacturing.

    https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3848710/

Sign In or Register to comment.