Greetings, friends and enemies. I'm dealing with a bout of insomnia at present. That, in itself, isn't too unusual; most of my posts on this forum have been thought up while I rolled around in bed, desperate for the death-like solace of dreamless sleep.
I'm curious, dear reader: do you suffer from any sleep disorders, or less severe somnolent complications? What effect does cuddling have on you? Does it make sleep easier? Or, perhaps, you've grown dependent on cuddling for a restful night? Maybe you're familiar with sleepwalking?
As for myself, I'm not very good at sleep. Aside from the above-mentioned insomnia, I've dealt with sleep paralysis, night terrors, and I am prone (according to a partner) to sobbing whilst unconscious.
The very worst thing, in my opinion, is contending with insomnia while cuddling with someone. There I am, in a darkened room, entangled with another human. I hear them breathing gently, feel the rise and fall of their chest, and they've got an arm wrapped around me. Thirty minutes pass, and I can't help but to focus on their inhalations and exhalations; they seem nearly mechanical in their regularity. The weight of their body, even if they don't weigh much at all, becomes an unbearable burden—I swear that our bones are grinding together.
An hour passes. I try to remove myself from their clutches, as the desire to scream in horror at being trapped is becoming too great. The living prison responds to my attempt at exfiltration; they tighten their grip on my arm, or nuzzle their head against my chest. I want to pull away in dramatic fashion, to leap from the bed or couch or spot on the floor, shrieking in both revulsion and relief.
"Where are you going?"
I stop my escape abruptly. "Nowhere," I say, as gently as I can. Surely, they can notice how tense my body is—how I had to force out that single word, as if it were some horrible curse?
The process repeats itself until I'm able to sneak away. It is agony.