Why not more responses???

WestsideMarcWestsideMarc
edited August 2019 in General

Hi everyone. So I put a lot of time and thought into creating what I believe to be a really good quality, well written profile, but I have gotten surprisingly few responses when I have reached out and messaged other cuddlers. I know my copy might be a little longer than others but at the end of the day it might take one an extra 30 seconds to read and I felt it important to cover ALLl of the bases which I believe I did.

I know there’s no headshot but that is also addressed in the profile. I live in Los Angeles so it’s not like there is a shortage of people in this town. And I have 2 very nice Karma reviews as well.

Generally I am not the kind of person to ask for opinions from strangers online, we all know how THAT can go downhill quickly, but I know that this is a good community of people so if anyone has any CONSTRUCTIVE and friendly input I’m open to hearing it here or by private message.

Thank you-

OK SO AS OF 7:45PM AUGUST 17 I IMPLEMENTED ALOT OF THE CHANGES SUGGESTED. SO THANKS TO EVERYONE (EXCEPT THAT ONE GUY WHO WILL HOPEFULLY BE BANNED).

Marc.........

Comments

  • Tiny_BubblesTiny_Bubbles
    edited August 2019

    You have a great profile. I would be down to meet you if we were in the same city!

    I would recommend putting the note about why you don't show your face clearly at the top of your profile so people don't click through your pictures and then click away.

    Beyond that, everything is pretty solid. What's your approach like? Do you message people hoping to cuddle on the spot, or do you try to get to know them first? Are you messaging people in your own city and are you in their preferred age range?

    Unfortunately women tend to get flooded with messages so it is very seldom that I do reply, even when someone pretty cool reaches out. It's very easy to get overwhelmed. Have you tried reaching out to the same person twice to see if your message got buried?

  • WestsideMarcWestsideMarc

    Thank you for that positive feedback I really appreciate it. I suppose I could re-order the photo part, I’m not sure if that would make a difference but I suppose I could try it.

    My general approach is to just send a short intro message to them and I may comment on something that I particularly like or have in common with their profile to show them that it is not just a copy and paste type of response. I will invite them to take a look at my profile and tell them that if anything resonates that I would love to hear back. If I don’t hear back in a week or so sometimes I will send a 2nd (non-stalker LOL) type message and say something like “hello again - I messaged you last week and just wanted to reach out one more time in case you were flooded by messages to let you know I liked your profile and would be interested in having a conversation”.... Something of that nature. After 2, no more messages.

    One thing that I don’t have a lot of patience for our endless one sentence messages that seem to go nowhere. Sometimes women well type hi how are you? Or thank you for your message. Or nice profile. Maybe they are just trying to warm up with that but sometimes it gets to the point where it’s just these and less back and forth that have no substance.

    The other thing that I do is, because I am interested in having a conversation sooner than later, is that I will offer my phone number and also offer them the option to dial*67 to caller ID block their number for their comfort zone. I also offer up my email and let them know we can talk on FaceTime or Skype or Kik. I do everything I can to initiate a telephone conversation while still allowing them to protect their privacy until they feel more comfortable.

  • [Deleted User]MacaronCuddles (deleted user)

    You have a cool profile. I hope you find some nice girls to cuddle with. It takes some time and patience.

  • mb0mb0
    edited August 2019

    I consider finding female non-pro cuddling partners on this site to be essentially impossible. Or at least it takes so much time and effort that it's not even close to worth it.

    Exactly one time I talked to someone who actually seemed to be interested in meeting... and it turned out she was a prostitute.

    It's just too time-consuming and depressing a process to bother with. I don't care how resilient you are, getting rejected over and over and over again will bring you down and make you resentful.

    Or you could look at the list of pros in your area, pick out someone you think you would like, spend a few dollars, and have her over when you want. Maybe it seems like a sad thing to do, but I actually have had some good experiences with pros and met some great people.

    My advice: either see pros on this site or go meet people somewhere else. I promise you, it's much easier to meet women in person (for platonic stuff or otherwise) than it is on this site.

  • mb0mb0
    edited August 2019

    FWIW, I just did two searches for cuddlers in your area. I searched for all non-pro men who cuddle women who've been online in the last two weeks. I also searched for all non-pro women who cuddle men who've been online in the last two weeks.

    Total numbers are....
    Men: 424
    Women: 26

    See the problem?

    Plus, suspiciously several of the women's profiles are empty - I never know what to make of that.

  • lazycuddlelazycuddle

    Looks like a tinder profile more than for platonic cuddling.

  • BabichevBabichev

    ^^^^^. What @mb0 said.

    "I consider finding female non-pro cuddling partners on this site to be essentially impossible."

    Believe it or not, a lot of us women have a hard time finding cuddle partners in spite of the male to female ratio being 10+ to one. What we run into is that a lot of the guys clearly are not looking for strictly platonic cuddling. It's hard on our end, too.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    @WestsideMarc Your profile is very good and authentic. The only question I would have is do you attach a face pic with your message? Ladies like to know who they are meeting for safety’s sake. Just upload a face photo with your first message. That is what I do.

    Secondly, I started paying attention to ROR on messages. For every 9 messages I send out, I get 3 in return—so about 33%. Some will never respond and that is ok—no sense worrying about them. But out of that 33%, I meet probably 76-80% for cuddles. It is a numbers and patience game.

  • WestsideMarcWestsideMarc

    Lazycuddle Saying that it looks more like a Tinder profile is just a ridiculous statement. At least I took the time to write something articulate and put a few photos as opposed to yours which has no photos and one sentence so not really gonna take any advice from you.

    FunCartel thank you very much for your message I appreciate it. As I mentioned in my profile once I actually make a connection with someone I am happy to send them a face pic. And thank you again

    Babichev Thank you as well for your response I appreciate it. I understand men have a propensity to have a hidden agenda on the site which is why I went out of my way to address all of that in my profile.
    :)

    Mb0 thank you as well. I know the ratios are pretty off. I’m not losing sleep over any of this after all it’s just a cuddle site but it is something I am sincere about. So thank you.

    CuddleinParis thank you as well.

  • lazycuddlelazycuddle

    Ok small bulge- stay safe on your hog.

  • mb0mb0

    And I will agree with you that lazycuddle's comments are inane and unhelpful.

  • WestsideMarcWestsideMarc

    Lazycuddle will be kicked off this site shortly.

  • [Deleted User]CharlesTwisted (deleted user)

    Welcome to being part of a glut of supply that has virtually no demand.

    Nothing to do with you, personally.

    It’s simply that, in the online “connecting” universe women find 85% of men “below average”, and 5% “above average”.

    Women also only initiate contact with less than 2% of those male profiles that they do rate as above average.

    So, in short, if you happen to be one of the 5 men in 100 a specific female finds above average you can still only expect to be contacted if you are that “1 in a 1,000” guy.

    Simply the reality of online “connecting”.

  • DaForceofNatureDaForceofNature
    edited August 2019

    If only you offered Android charging as well.... 😎
    Otherwise, your profile and bio seem great to me. Your approach seems quite acceptable too.
    One note : if you are offering your phone # quickly, that can be seen as a red flag. not always but often, moving things off-site means someone is looking for more.

  • [Deleted User]DarrenWalker (deleted user)
    edited August 2019

    @WestsideMarc: Your profile looks really good to me—if I were in your area (and if I were a woman) I'd contact you. I think about the only things I'd change are the comma after 'every' and before 'body', the "could might pose," the "st least question," and the mention of flossing.

    The comma's not necessary. "Everybody is different. And every body is different."

    Pick either 'could' or 'might' for that sentence in the second to last paragraph.

    Change "st least question" to "or at least a question."

    And people don't kiss on here (according to the terms of service, even communicating a desire to kiss is verboten), so mentioning that you have good flossing habits might give the wrong impression.

    Other than that, I'd say it's better than mine. Time and patience! I wish you luck.

  • WestsideMarcWestsideMarc

    Darren Walker Thank you for the great feedback. I never even thought that the flossing comment might come off iffy. I just meant that I’m conscious of good breath. Nothing more nothing less but thank you so much...

  • WestsideMarcWestsideMarc

    Darren Walker - I cleaned it up a little bit and deleted that whole paragraph as I don’t want anything to be even possibly misconstrued. Thanks again!

  • [Deleted User]DarrenWalker (deleted user)

    @WestsideMarc: No problem. Yeah, based on the rest of your profile I figured the flossing thing was probably just about breath, but it never hurts to be sure. Glad I could help!

  • WestsideMarcWestsideMarc

    OK everyone I just give my profile a major haircut and tweaking. Thank you everyone for your great feedback. I have my new profile in place. I’ll work on a few other pics....

  • BabichevBabichev

    @WestsideMarc This totally got my attention: " I validate parking, offer free iPhone charging and best of all, my couch is gluten-free..." I'm sold!

    I don't get the tinder comment. I wish I got a message from someone like you!

    It's frustrating because I know there are people out there who really want to cuddle and I mean just cuddle. I don't know how we find each other. I wish I had some brilliant ideas. Sadly, I don't.

  • WestsideMarcWestsideMarc

    Thank you for saying that I appreciate it. Yeah the tinder guy made an additional, idiotic and inappropriate comment as you may see, I blocked, flagged and reported him and I told him that bought him a ban and I was right. Everyone else had constructive feedback but there’s always one idiot in the room and that was him.

    Anyway yeah it’s frustrating which is why I put the post but I made some changes on it based on a lot of good feedback and they all reflect now. Well see what happens.

    And as far as your last sentence saying I don’t know how we find each other, well that’s the whole purpose of this site here.
    :)

  • TheTouchCoachTheTouchCoach
    edited August 2019

    I loved your profile and would totally want to cuddle with you! Loved the work that you put into it. I have my profile done as well. I think its important to communicate who you are on here, it just gives a little preview of your essence. :)

  • WestsideMarcWestsideMarc

    Thank you South Florida I really appreciate it

Sign In or Register to comment.