Whoa! I had a good cuddle experience!

BabichevBabichev
edited September 2019 in General

My dear forum friends and strangers,

Many of you have heard about my frustrating experiences in meeting good cuddle partners. It seems for the guys the challenge is getting a response from a woman in the first place. For some of us women, we get messages but too often they are from goofballs and when we do finally try to get together with someone, it appears a lot of them either don't understand what the word "platonic" means or don't care. Out of frustration, I took a break from this site. I despaired that I would ever be able to find a cuddle buddy.

Recently I've had messages from guys who seem decent. None live here but one comes here sometimes for business so we got together. On the way there I was thinking if this goes poorly, I'll probably never try this again.

We're in a difficult position. I've tried, after several less than stellar experiences, to be veryexplicit* in my profile about what I'm looking for, what I am not looking for, what works for me and what doesn't. Still, either guys don't read or don't care. I don't want to have a long list of "please don't do this, please don't do that," (like, I really think I shouldn't have to say "no humping"), it just makes you end up looking like an uptight cranky bitch. On the other hand, guys keep doing stuff. What's a girl to do?

So, I went and from the very start this guy seemed decent, like a nice, normal human being who is cuddle deprived and just needs some nice platonic cuddling. We seem to be looking for the same thing. Wow! I know there are folks like that out there, I just haven't been able to figure out how to connect with them. It appears I finally have.

I am so relieved. It was a very nice experience. No pressure. This gives me hope.

I wanted to thank all of you who have encouraged me as I've been trying to navigate these waters. Your insight has been helpful. And wanted to make sure you knew that the cuddling deities have smiled on me.

Anyone else have any good cuddling experiences recently?

Comments

  • [Deleted User]hikerincbus (deleted user)

    I love that you finally had a good experience! Yes, I have recently had a good experience. I was able to watch a movie with a cuddler where we just held hands and talked. She and I are going to do it again in a few weeks. We are both good looking professionals (trying to say this without sounding conceeded) and our experience was strictly platonic. I am using my good luck with others. <3 for you and your experience :)

  • [Deleted User]PriyaLal (deleted user)
    edited September 2019

    I am hopeful for everyone on this site because I had a great cuddle experience with an enthusiast and a pro. The enthusiast was such gentlemen, and the pro was a true genuine pro in the art of cuddling.

    Let me share with you my life seems so changed after that.

    It really helps those of us who are cuddle starved without having the pressure to do
    more. So glad I found this site. Mentally it was a real spiritual booster. I wish the same positive experience for others on this site too 😊

  • [Deleted User]DarrenWalker (deleted user)

    Congratulations, @Babichev! It's wonderful to meet a decent human being every once in a while, isn't it? I wish you luck in finding more—may the cuddling deities continue to smile on you!

  • [Deleted User]PriyaLal (deleted user)

    Thank you Darren Walker for your nice comments much appreciated. 👍🏽

  • wrenchwrench

    Congrats! Nice people do exist!

  • [Deleted User]SoftPetals (deleted user)

    @Babichev I'm so glad you found a cuddler to provide for your cuddling needs, respect your boundaries, and understand what this platform supports! I have had great cuddle sessions. There were a couple who tried to be sexual with me (SMH!!!!) but, once I spoke up they either just respected it and we still talk, or respected it and moved on. I had great cuddle session early this morning (Eastern Standard time 1am) with someone I cuddled with before and he didn't leave until I was massaged then cuddled to sleep. I enjoy falling asleep in someone'es arms and he enjoyed doing it. So stay patient everyone. :D You will find your perfect cuddler(s) too <3

  • quietman775quietman775

    @Babichev Congratulations! I'm glad you've had some success.

    For must cuddlers, sequence is everything. There are a certain amount of bad guys out there. and a substantial amount of good folks. The order you meet them in is a matter of random chance. If new members meet a handful of bad actors FIRST, it tends to sour them on the whole experience, and they give up. Maybe even post stuff about how the website "isn't what it pretends to be." On the other hand, if a new member has several good experiences first, it's easy to write off a couple of bad ones as the luck of the draw. You move on with your enthusiasm undimmed. That's what happened to me. So I'm glad I found this place; it's been worthwhile for me.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel

    @quietman775 I agree but I would add that women run a much higher probability of running into bad apples more frequently than men.

  • BabichevBabichev

    Thanks to everyone for sharing my joy and sharing their own experiences. My faith is restored.

  • ReltvlyCanshesReltvlyCanshes

    That’s great @Babichev, gives me hope. Not to discredit the one cuddle I’ve had from a pro, but from an enthusiast that i can maintain a consistent cuddle relationship

  • [Deleted User]creedhands (deleted user)

    I must share my good cuddle experience. I expressed interest in getting to know someone with the intent of eventually cuddling. And they responded with a "no thanks". I almost fell out of my chair that someone would be so polite to respond that they were not interested rather than just ignoring or blocking me.

  • BabichevBabichev

    Well, I had another good experience! I'm delighted.

    I kind of have felt a bit between a rock and a hard place. I don't want to list a whole bunch of "don'ts." It's so negative and doesn't make a good impression. But unfortunately, I've felt a need to do that because guys kept doing things that really did not work (and often violated the rules) and writing about what I did want, trying to keep it positive, clearly wasn't working.

    I was really straight with this guy and said listen, I'd love to find a cuddle buddy. And I keep having these discouraging experiences. He responded very positively and said he read my profile a couple of times because, as he put it, "I want to do this right." It was a lovely experience for both of us.

    So I had two lovely evenings of cuddling and then today went to a Turkish festival, ate good food and met some really nice, interesting people, and then went to a dance with really lively music and good dancing. I'm in a good mood!

  • LovelightLovelight

    First stating your preferences, and boundaries don't make you look like a "b". Those who'd say such are a) those who break the rules in the first place. Or b) those who are chicken to do it themselves, so, they support those who do. Sometimes people also support the wrong things out of poor judgment. So, there are grey areas all around.

    Someone humpin you is certainly inappropriate when you haven't consented to that. It's even sexual harassment, etc. The same way, it is if they cupped you. I hope you didn't have to experience any of this, and if you've I hope you report/ed them.

    It's not our issue whether they understand or read the rules and what the site is actually for. At the end of the day, they break the rules: and they get dealt with accordingly.

    I am happy to know that you are making progress! However, I'd advice to take a step back, and not get your hopes too high. As someone who's had her share of let downs, that's my advice. As for me, I've had one person that so far I had a nice in person conversation with. Hasn't progressed to any form of physical contact. Nor have we spoke much since. He'd told me that he's going back to his country the next day (?) and wants(?) to connect when he's back. I don't know if he is, though we haven't spoke since.

    I might share sometime if I make more progress, though. I wish you well! 🙂

  • [Deleted User]2dogmom (deleted user)

    Good for you! It's a lot of work but there are some good guys out there.

  • johnjohn1265gbpjohnjohn1265gbp

    Hey, there are just as many females out there that play games. I have met many of them. They're not looking to cuddle they want to scam a guy out of money and also there are females on here just looking for sex.

  • [Deleted User]Bles (deleted user)
    edited October 2019

    We meet each other where we are mentally and emotionally. We talk about where we are in life and what we are both working on now. We look at each other with an appreciation for our humanity. We reach for each other's hands and hold them still. Gently massaging and maintaining eye contact. We tell each other what we'd like to to do and where we like to be touched. We keep that back and forth conversation going. We hug each other and gracefully move into various cuddling positions switching roles and giving constant feedback to each other. Keeping a continuous flow of energy and paced sequencing of positions. For me that's a great cuddle experience .

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