Anyone care for real hug talk?

[Deleted User]Bles (deleted user)
in Cuddle Requests

This is an unprecedented time in history. Physical distancing recommendations have put a damper on social interaction. So there can be no physical cuddling.

But through social media such as this one we can still talk to and with each other by using words in such a way as to make us feel "hugged" . That is, to make each other feel acknowledged and understood.

If anyone feel the desire or need for real connecting conversation or hug talk share your experiences here. Or request them as you feel.

Comments

  • [Deleted User]Bles (deleted user)
    edited April 2020

    @Bles I would love to share my version of hug talk with you.

    Hey how are you really feeling today? Talk to me.

    Right now I'm craving a tight chest to chest squeeze. Tell me what you like.

    I would love to lay on my side facing you. To look into those shiny eyeballs and hold your hand.

    Would you mind if I massaged your finger tips with mine?

    Oh would I love to have my shoulders rubbed. I love the sensation of having you trace my upper arms with your finger tips and occasionally lightly and tenderly rub my upper and middle back. I collect all my tension in that region.

    And now that I have to wear a mask all the time my throat is so dry and achy and my face and nose sore. I would love for you to trace and very lightly carress my throat with your fingers and slowly and gently move to my cheeks and edge them with your finger tips. Then slowly yet gently edge my nose bridge. Slowly in a circular fashion trace and edge gently and alternately between my nose bridge, face cheeks and throat. God that feels good!🤗

    So what has worked for you today? What didn't work too well for you today?
    How may I help you to feel good or better than you were before this message?

    I so appreciate the time you share with me. And I treasure your company.

    Please do continue to enjoy your day staying safe, staying healthy always.😊

  • [Deleted User]Bles (deleted user)

    It's an alien concept of encapsulating a physical activity in words. Or to simulate a physical experience in a few words.

  • [Deleted User]Bles (deleted user)

    @Bles the best hug talk is what you give to yourself. Keep cuddling yourself and talk to your arms and fingers as you cajole and tell them what to do.

    The best response they can give you is a relaxing sensation of feeling your own touch.

    BTW I cuddled myself to tears a couple nights ago and spooned in the magic flight position with my 20 year old pillow. Nothing could hold back tears I wasn't even trying to make. Didn't even know I was making until I felt the wetness under my face as I repositioned myself in my sleep. But it goes with the territory of being alone. Sometimes you self soothe when emotions silently overcome you like a thief in the night. No matter how much you fortify your mind.

  • [Deleted User]Bles (deleted user)
    edited April 2020

    @Bles Self talk is the best medicine ever. I'm learning to do it in my sleep. No one can replace that self that assures and encourages. No one can give the insight and compassion that the self does. No one.

    I was in such deep self talk the other night I woke up at 6:30 in the morning and thought it was 6:30 in the evening. Self talk has allowed me to rationalize all the things that didn't work out in life and embrace the opportunity they presented to gain new insight. I'm always looking for the silver lining. Always. No one can teach me about me like I can. No one.

    The more I interact with folks the more I embrace my simplicity / stupidity as my inner harbor of Grace and gratitude. To me criticism and judgment of any kind is a blessing. An instructive lesson in wisdom of all kinds.

    After all we have to live whether we belong or not. Whether we are connected or not. When you don't have you learn to live without

    I can be human all by myself. I am an island. And I have learnt to survive in that stream.

    So what if it makes me a little jaded and off kiltered at times? So what? It's okay. I'm okay. I'll always be okay

    I never ever see myself as being entitled to anyone's interest. Ever. I'd rather be alone than be a bother or nuisance to anybody. I'd rather talk to oak trees and my body parts than beg for any one's attention.

    I respect myself enough I don't need anyone's respect of me.

  • [Deleted User]Bles (deleted user)
    edited April 2020

    @Bles remember there are real people suffering . Real people with real problems. You are not real. You don't seem to have real problems or else you would be out there contributing to society and living like a normal , real person. You wouldn't be on this social media reveling in nonsensical crap

    Lol. You sound like my estranged mother in law who used to say I'm not real. I was not real enough to be a real mother to her grandchildren. I was not real enough to be a real wife to her son.

    Today we get along very well even as I'm no longer with her son. Talk about abscense makes the heart grow fonder. Another woman has taken my place. Now she wants to talk. Life is so funny!

    So yes I'm not real. I don't have real problems. But I work my ass off every time and put each of my lungs and kidneys on floor and give all I have got above and beyond the call of duty. So I'm contributing on a macro economic level. But I'm not supposed to be human enough to feel,

    I must compare myself to others who don't have anything going for them. Who have life many times worse than I. And diminish myself. Even as I give thanks for everything I have. I live a very frugal life. Living within my means always.

    But I'm not supposed to feel. For years I told myself never to feel. I numbed myself to everyone and everything around me . What I felt never mattered. Never existed. I just lived. I almost forgot how to feel. Almost

  • [Deleted User]Bles (deleted user)
    edited April 2020

    You really don't need anyone's hug. Just as you don't need their validation.

    You give yourself all that by engaging in useful activities you enjoy or simply find so interesting it captivates you.

    That's what I've been doing with my gardening and lawn care. Researching and watching every YouTube video I can find to enhance my knowledge. And checking in with weekly mowing, mulching and pruning so I keep ahead of whatever is going on with the nutrient quality of my soil. Learning new ways to use compost, egg shells and magnesium salts to boost my soil especially my herb and plant garden. I get my cardiovascular work out going on and I'm manifesting my true self and goals as I do so. I'm content. Just looking at the grass in my back lawn puts a smile on my face. So I'm good.

    Just live and be you. And strangely you'll find your desire for hugs or contact with anyone slowly diminishes. Until you no longer desire it.

  • lefteeleftee

    At the risk of interrupting your messages, I wanted to say how much I enjoyed the visual I get from your 2nd Apr. 8 post. I love to use fingers on face, neck, back or fingertips. The human body is amazing. The sensation derived from closeness is truly something to be grateful for; never more than at present.

  • [Deleted User]Bles (deleted user)

    @leftee you're not interrupting anything. Thanks for your comments. I do appreciate. And please feel free to add to it too.

  • [Deleted User]Bles (deleted user)

    Been feeling lots of aches and pains lately. Some days it feels like a truck ran over all my bones.

    Since I only have me to cuddle me I have been busy with my fingers and hands to self soothe.

    Today I started with my head working my finger tips all over my scalp. It feels so relieving and relaxing!

    As I take deep cleansing breaths I move my finger pads down to my forehead. I lightly crawl them circularly across my forehead and downward to my cheeks and temples. I feel every sinew of sensation radiating from my gums to my neck bone. And with it nagging pain fading away.

    I work my arms and shoulders in a flex and extension routine as I take a couple more breaths and rest. I lightly massage my shoulder pads and arms then finally bring my hands in a resting fold on my chest. I breathe in to my diaphragm and hold. Then slowly release as I tap my sternum and feel my pulse. I am calm and without pain at the moment.

    I keep my routine of momentarily breathing in and out of my diaphragm as I unfold my arms. I pick up my fingers and gently massage each tip until I feel every muscle relax and all my nerves lay still. It's a very tranquil space. I sit still and relaxed in that space for several hours. Until the phone rings.
    I wrestled with taking Motrin or ibuprofen or some kind of pain reliever. But then I thought of the COVID-19. And the potential for cytokine storms associated with inflammation. I decide to tough it out.

    I feel temporary relief. But it's also comforting to my soul. So I'll just keep cuddling my self in the areas where I need relief from aches and pain. All while giving myself the added bonus of self care and self love. No one can do that for me! No one! Not in a million years.

  • [Deleted User]Bles (deleted user)
    edited May 2020

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  • [Deleted User]Bles (deleted user)
    edited May 2020

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  • quixotic_lifequixotic_life

    ♡ love your streams of consciousness....

    Your writings remind me of one of my most favorite people ~ so glad there are more like her out there. 🤗

  • [Deleted User]Bles (deleted user)

    Thank you for your thoughtful comments.

    I post these thoughts mainly for introspection and self motivation. They also keep me company. They comfort and guide. They teach and give me inner peace. They're also gifts I share as needed with others. And regift to myself.

    Again thank you.

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