Life without much in person interaction/support

This pandemic has likely changed a lot of things for people. Or, at least some things. I know I have experienced less in person interactions. I'm sure I'm not the only one. I am curious, how have you all been able to keep those interactions going? If you're still finding people that want to cuddle, or spend in person time together, that's awesome. For me, the one cuddle session I had was really nice. But for those that aren't cuddling right now, how are you either making up for that particular interaction, or getting support that you might need?

Comments

  • For me, I have 2 friends I can hang out with on a fairly regular basis, and I also cuddle with someone. And doing that has improved my mental health

  • @transgirlkatie That's really great to hear! I'm glad you have those people to be there for you.

  • edited August 2020

    @sean2589 I go to my friend Jake's garage every morning to work out except Sundays. We have a great group of individuals that go at 9 am and then that's it for the rest of my day except Tuesdays when I do Zoom bible study/small group with some members of my church. I've been watching a crap ton of NetFlix and found a show called Teenage Bounty Hunters with Kadeem Hardison that I love. The last in-person photo shoot that I did was about a month ago with a model.

  • I'm highly introverted, so with the exception of work (IE: losing it), nothing has really changed for me.

  • I've been Zooming with peeps, having an occasional distanced hang or walk, and hugging myself.

  • @littermate
    "Distanced cuddling" sounds like a contradiction in terms ; but I agree that the physical contact is actually only one element of cuddling, and good quality of the other elements can make up for it.

  • Yeah @geoff1000 cuddling isn't happening for me right now, alas, but thought I'd answer the question of what I'm doing for in person interaction and support. And I'm not closed to meeting peeps from here for those kinds of safe interactions and getting to know each other while we wait for the COVID world to shift in some cuddle-friendly way.

  • I'm lucky we haven't had new cases here in the Canberra region for quite a while, so restrictions are a bit more relaxed. I've been able to catch up with friends and family in person, but I also love doing video and voice chats with my online besties. I'm back to doing in-person pro cuddle sessions but only for people in Canberra and the surrounding regions. I ask people to fill out a COVID declaration form just in case too.

  • @TouchSanctuary what is a "COVID declaration form?"

  • @littermate this is the one I use: https://form.jotform.co/202323428066853

    It's a standard form used by massage therapists and other kinds of alternative/holistic health practitioners in my area. I went to get a lymphatic drainage massage recently and had to fill one out.

  • With the way the U.S. has been treating the pandemic, I'm afraid it will never go away and in-person cuddles will be a thing of the past. :'(

  • @Mike403 that sounds so difficult! :( I really hope things improve soon.

  • @TouchSanctuary - It's been a struggle. I doubt it will be over anytime soon. If we return to some degree of normalcy by summer of next year, that will be extremely fast.

  • @CrossFitNLattes It sounds like you've really been finding great ways to spend your time, as well as good support! I as well have a bible study I'm part of on Tuesdays. That's helped me out a good bit.

  • @sean2589 unfortunately the leader of the bible study group is a teacher so we have collectively decided to end our time together. A lot of the other members are teachers as well and as you can imagine they are going through hell right now with distance learning.

  • [Deleted User]vernnyc (deleted user)
    edited August 2020

    Much like @BrianL, I am in introvert so changes are not as big for me. I used to go out occasionally , but mostly just to be around people, like in cafe's or diners. I do miss that, however. It was nice to have SOME interaction and the cafe's helped keep me honest in my job search. It's easier for me to do work when I am surrounded by other people, also doing work.

    That said, someone will be the recipient of a lot of cuddle once I feel comfortable doing that again! Where is my "I would cuddle you so hard" tee shirt? And does it fit? ;-)

  • Q. Are you afraid of the dark ?
    A. I don't know, I always sleep with a light on.

    Perhaps many of us who cuddled regularly ( even if not often ) didn't realise how much they needed it.

    Others maybe didn't realise how much they needed the potential to have it ( e.g. with a pro who was near enough ). Kinda like when you are out hiking and suddenly realise your cellphone battery is dead ; you weren't planning on breaking a leg and calling for help, but it was reassuring to know you could.

  • I like the scene in "Passengers", where Chris Pratt's character is alone on the spacecraft, and he deliberately spills food on the floor, so the cleaning robots will move around near him, giving him some "company".

    Some people put out food for birds or squirrels, to have an interaction with sentient life forms ; and others cultivate plants for the same effect.

    I think humans are hardwired to want interaction, to feel that our lives matter ; and although physical interaction with other humans is usually best, we are good at finding any kind of substitute. Anyone who has seen "Castaway" will remember Tom Hanks' character chatting with Wilson, the soccer ball on which he has drawn a face.

  • The only people I have any contact with are my 2 daughters. Just got back from a 2-week vacation with them. I used to go into the office one day a week and talk to my team members. But now I'm working from home full time and have no personal contact. Well apart from the cashier at the supermarket when I buy groceries.

  • @Mike 403: I expect things will get progressively better over time as they learn more about treating the virus and start vaccinating higher risk people. In fact, the death rate has dropped in my county from over 4% to more like 1.5%. And that only includes the known cases. So, someone is doing something right. I try to remember that the news has to focus on the negative to make money which makes it seem like things are completely hopeless. I figure it's up to us to decide when it's safe for us and how we want to keep others safe.The important thing is to try to keep others safe. I don't know if in person cuddling or social interaction needs to be stopped completely until the government makes some kind of official declaration after they've come up with multiple anti-virals, multiple vaccines, convinced everyone to get vaccinated and then spent years studying all this to make sure it worked.

  • [Deleted User]SociallyAwkward (deleted user)

    @Mike403 I agree with that. Shame people are so ignorant.

  • [Deleted User]SJ2468 (deleted user)
    edited September 2020

    Perhaps many of us who cuddled regularly ( even if not often ) didn't realise how much they needed it.

    This is me. Until about 6 months ago, I thought I was relatively independent, self-sufficient, and solitary. Since then, we've disappeared into our houses, and the relationship I was in ended. My children don't like to hug or even show much affection, and I'm not around the rest of society for even things like handshakes and "hello hugs", so the last 2 months have really highlighted for me how much I get out of physical touch from another.

    This whole situation has been a real eye-opener to me on exactly what I'm missing.

    As for the original question:
    how are you either making up for that particular interaction, or getting support that you might need?

    Not well. :astonished: I end up trying to substitute with other behaviors (overeating) that don't satisfy. While such things might feel ok for a moment, they don't really satisfy.

  • I created a new experience called beyond cuddles, which was inspired both by the virtual cuddles I did through here and my work as a meditation teacher. I’m curious what you think!

  • So sorry for the late response everyone. I often forget to check here if I don't have any message notifications sent to my email. Thank you all for responding to my question, and saying what your experiences have been.

    @RamanAngel I have never heard of "beyond cuddles", but am definitely intrigued to know more about it.

  • @geoff1000

    we are good at finding any kind of substitute

    Yep, it's worth reminding that having a Dog companion can do absolute wonders especially for people who never had a dog before (like me).

    Women come and go, but your doggie will stay with you for as long as he lives.

    For people around here that like hugging, I would recommend against tiny microdogs as you want some core body mass to hug.

    For example, a Siberian husky is a great size as it's small enough to carry in my arms but large enough to hug.

  • [Deleted User]sage_wisdom (deleted user)

    I inordinately value quarantine time. I cherish the time I have by myself. I need to be alone far more than being in the company of others to feel safe, happy, secure, sane, healthy, etc...

  • @sage_wisdom I tend to be the same way. I really value my alone time. It's just at times, having someone's company is a great thing. It's like 5 days a week, I'm good with being to myself and doing my own thing. But those other 2 days, I like having people to be around or talk to, even if it's just for an hour combined those 2 days.

  • [Deleted User]squeakytoy (deleted user)

    Agreed with both of you, @sage_wisdom and @sean2589 ! Even when the pandemic ends, I'm definitely going to keep a lot of the lifestyle changes I made this year. I used to say "yes" to waaaay too many social events and felt continuously drained as a result. And working from home is sheer bliss. :)

  • [Deleted User]iamkimmyp (deleted user)

    I have friends that I get together with for lunch every couple of weeks.

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