When people use the word "virtual" and "cuddle" in the same sentence. That's not what you're doing.
Any annoyances you want to share?
People who correct one's grammer or pronunciation mid thought.
If you know what they meant then let it go or save the correction for later. It's derailing and makes it seem like they aren't actually interested in the speaker or their content and they just want to sound superior.
Listen to what they mean, not what they say / Listen beyond what you hear.
edit: typo...
@quixotic_life - Happens often online. You could be making a logical argument and because you spelled a word wrong or used improper grammar, nobody cares about the original argument anymore. I swear the internet is full of English professors.
Lol ~ Guilty 🙋♀️ (but it's typically only when they're reiterating a point and they've gone with a word or phrase that throws off their message).
The peeve for me is when it happens in conversation. With typed messages we can proofread and edit ~ It's not so easy when processing out loud or telling a story though.
I think we have to find some way to identify that a voice or video call or even text exchange ; is being done with the emotional connection of a cuddle, rather than with the emotional disconnection of a business meeting. The term chosen tries to do that, and most people know what it means, but if that term is disliked, we need an alternative.
Some people might say that "platonic cuddle" is similarly an oxymoron, and it should just be called "holding", but our community has adopted it.
Accuracy of written text is important, if the reader has to translate it.
I agree with the principle that it is very difficult to concentrate on the meaning and mechanics at the same time, so making corrections, suggests less attention is being paid to the meaning.
My biggest pet peeve is when someone spells my name wrong through email! My name is in my email address, my signature and at the closing of the email. It's literally no way you can spell it wrong.
Also, I don't like being ignored. 😂
Happy Cuddles! Menna
Stop at a red light .. and there’s a line of cars in front of you . Then the light turns green , but someone in front of you is on his phone , and doesn’t notice the green . Worst is the left hand turn lanes , and the guy on the phone just in time makes the light after you leaned on the horn and you don’t make it .
@cuddlerforu24 You should probably watch "Unhinged". ☹️
@Mike403 I and many of the people I've "virtual cuddled" with would disagree with your pet peeve. But then maybe the term is not accurate enough. I'm OK with a more-accurate term. Nevermind that this thread could be criticized as a gripe chat, and that I'd probably be criticized if I called it that 😆
I've had video chats that have made me feel similarly to a real cuddle. Some of them made me feel better than real-life cuddles. To me it's not just a skin sensation, it's a deeper feeling of connectedness and sharing and comfort. Every physical sensation has a mental or emotional equivalent. Sure they can't all emulate each other perfectly, but it can feel like it.
I've had physical cuddles where I didn't feel those things well (connectedness and sharing and comfort) and it didn't feel worth it. I've had virtual ones where I did feel those things well and I felt better for days. Some felt like a spiritual experience, some felt like they "fixed" me.
Maybe you just have different reactions and perceptions to physical/mental stimulus, and you need more physical; maybe I'm more delusional because I react more to virtual than you do (I remember being able to mentally emulate the feeling of smoking weed to the point where I felt just as high and relaxed... I don't know how to do that now).
I don't know; I just wouldn't toss the term "virtual cuddle" into the trash like it's meaningless, because it's been very meaningful for people who couldn't meet with someone physically.
@davebutton - I never said a virtual session couldn't be beneficial. It's just not cuddling. Cuddling can be in silence and you can even fall asleep in somebody's arms. Just try that virtually.
@Mike403 I wasn't going off the basis of thinking you said a virtual cuddle wasn't beneficial. However, virtual cuddle is just that, emulating a cuddle session with someone, whether that's the most accurate term or not. I've gotten the same feelings in a virtual cuddle chat as a real one,not perfectly physically same, but I don't consider a virtual cuddle session not a cuddle session just because we can't touch each other, especially in a pandemic or if someone can't find someone physically, and I've felt better afterword with some virtual sessions than real ones, which is what matters to me most. The term seems accurate enough for me at least, and it's worked for me, so I'll continue using it. Sometimes emulation is the best you can get, and I wouldn't say a war video game isn't a fighting game just because you don't physically fight in it.
Listening to Bjork, and never having seen her live, and having seen a lot of music artists perform live online recently, I would call those virtual concerts.
If this is a pet peeve thread (and not a gripe thread haha), then I guess my top pet peeve here would be gatekeeping or term shaming unless someone comes up with a more accurate term 😆
@davebutton - The true definition of cuddling is physically touching somebody. You can't emulate that online. You can talk to them, play games, watch movies, whatever. I prefer "virtual session".
Being a photographer, my biggest pet peeve is having a model schedule an appointment with me and then cancelling same day as the appointment. It's very rude and inconsiderate considering the photographer has gotten his/her equipment ready for the shoot and booked studio time. Not only is the model not showing up but the tog is also out money for studio rental.
If I'm watching a movie, some scenes give me the emotion of participating in the event ; such as vertigo looking over a cliff, or the fright of a dangerous situation. We have become used to calling these "virtual reality". Flight simulators can feel like the real thing.
Some ASMR videos have someone whispering with their head sideways on a pillow, and if that's good enough, it can make the viewer believe they are sharing a bed. They might need to add a pillow alongside for the physical sensation.
Hands down women peeing all over the seats in public restrooms and leaving it. Ironic that it is their disgust about toilet seats and whose bum might have been on them that causes them to do something a tad disgusting themselves. I also can't stand moldy-smelling towels when I go to dry myself somewhere that's not home. Lastly, the smell of dryer sheets when I walk in a neighborhood. Ack! Please don't share your chemicals with the world, thanks so much. Those are my peeves du jour. That was rather cathartic, thank you.
@littermate perhaps could use a funnel or a stencil shaped like toilet ?
@littermate - I heard that a public toilet seat is cleaner than a public drinking fountain.
@Mike403 good thing they srent peeing in the drinking fountain
@pmvines - lol. I think that urine is more sterile than some of the stuff that makes it onto drinking fountains.
@pmvines - Also, the toilets are cleaned way more often.
Yeah but I would still rather drink water
Thanks, @littermate - I am both horrified and highly amused at the same time. Bwahaha.
@quixotic_life - case in point
@Mike403 I know what the definition of cuddle is. I also know what the definition of a concert is, and a book meeting, and a wine class... and all of those can be done virtually online.
Yes cuddling is at base physical, like attending a concert, or reading a book, or attending a wine class, and those can also be done virtually. Not to the normal effect, but to a decent effect. Which is what's happened to me. I got the same feeling with someone online that I did in person, and I left satisfied, sometimes moreso than another in person. Absolutely you can physically be with someone and have it be a feelingless effect, like cardboard. I've left feeling worse from an in-person cuddle session.
So maybe you only get the sense of cuddle comfort with physical touch, but that doesn't mean others are the same way, because for me it's at least as much mental and sometimes emotional as it is physical, and maybe the reasons I gave before don't matter to you or weren't read. OK, you're super-physical, and I don't believe there's a hard line with the definition here for people in general.
Ultimately it should be physical with someone at some point, but we're kind of in a pandemic here, and this "hobby" isn't exactly the most popular taste with people, and if somebody's getting the underlying feeling of a cuddle when they can't do it physically, I consider that a virtual cuddle.
My definition lies on the whole feeling during the session and afterword. I'm sorry you haven't felt that kind of connection or affect with someone without touch, but maybe someday you can and will understand what I mean, because it can be very powerful, sometimes moreso than in person.
If I need touch and I can't find a cuddler or whatever, I'll get a massage. Not as great as a cuddle to me, but I need it sometimes after consistent physical activity or lack of it. I'll never say a virtual massage is legit (unless maybe it involves a machine), but I know for a fact that virtual cuddle is a legit term, with the same legit underlying benefits, whether that makes you snicker or not.
PS I haven't read the replies after Mike's reply to mine
@davebutton - Once again, I never said there isn't a benefit in a virtual session. It just isn't cuddling. You can watch a concert virtually, but you can't physically touch somebody virtually.
edit: I know there's a pandemic going on right now, but you can't alter the definition that is in the dictionary that says a cuddle is physical touch. It's funny how you compared it to a book meeting when obviously you can still have that meeting online.
@Mike403 But I wasn't saying you were saying there wasn't a benefit nor was I basing my replies on that.
I just disagree with you on your definition that virtual cuddling is not cuddling.
Concerts are traditionally in-person. Virtually you watch it on Netflix. It's not quite the same experience, but it's virtual. You can get the same feeling virtually as in-person even if it's not as profound or physical.
What I've been trying to get across is that the the feeling I've gotten from some virtual cuddle sessions has met the underlying goal of the purpose of this site for me, just as real ones have. And some real ones haven't even though I got all the physical touch I was going for. To feel connection, relation, and comfort. Virtual ones will never replace real ones, but saying that "virtual cuddle" is not "cuddle" ignores the underlying feeling that I and others have gotten from them, which is the goal of the site for us. (I won't call that feeling a "benefit" again because you keep jumping to the conclusion that me saying I've gotten the underlying "benefit" of my reason for being here means that I'm saying you're saying there's no benefit to virtual cuddling, which is not what I've beensaying)
"I know there's a pandemic going on right now, but you can't alter the definition that is in the dictionary that says a cuddle is physical touch."
I didn't even attempt to alter the definition of "cuddle"... just defended that "virtual cuddle" is a legit term when it comes to cuddle comfort, because I've gotten the same feeling from a virtual one than a real one, sometimes better.
Plus if your definition is a dictionary's (which one?), then I can't argue with a non-conscious dictionary because it can't even hear my reasoning. I kind of like when people have a mind of their own with their own interpretation of a definition as it applies to their own experience, but if you're stone-cold on a dictionary definition, then maybe that's how your conversations are in sessions outside of the touch factor, just no feeling unless there's touch. I feel a lot more things than touch, that's why some virtual ones have felt so powerful; my connection and relation with the person. I see it in people's face and body language too.
"It's funny how you compared it to a book meeting when obviously you can still have that meeting online."
Yah, and you can have a cuddle session online too. In a concert, you feel the air, experience the smells, the ambiance, the auditory dynamics; in a wine class, similar things, but with the ambiance of difference personalities in the flesh, the wine tasting, the combinations with it and the chemistry in your skin with other's body heat and pheromones... yet you can still have a virtual wine class session. It's still virtual without the tasting. Someone can describe the tastes in ways you can virtually experience it, emulate it, maybe not fully, but it's still virtual.
A virtual cuddle session is the same way; it's emulated, virtual, not touching anything physical as you would in-person, but "cuddle comfort" is as much a state of mind for me as it is physical.
If you just don't agree, OK, that's you. But your assertion that a virtual cuddle is not a cuddle because it's not physical ignores everything but the physical, and is as silly as saying a virtual cuddle is the same as a cuddle. And guess what I do feel things physically in a virtual cuddle, as I've described, based on the person and the session and my mood and the setting... a connection of minds can generate the same feelings I get in-person, the same result internally, and sometimes I've felt better PHYSICALLY waking up the next morning after a very connective virtual session than many just-OK or even good in-person ones.
I just hope you'll let down your hard lines and stone-cold separations and open up more to the mental/emotional/spiritual aspects of cuddle comfort, because they've definitely been there for me, and not everyone has a person physically there for them. Just at least be open to the fact that for people other than you, a virtual cuddle is a cuddle comfort session for them, and they don't have those hard lines and separation that you do.
I really hope you've read what I said, otherwise it's easy for me to just assume you've jumped to the wrong conclusions.
@davebutton - Except nothing in the definition of a concert says that you must smell the air, etc... It just means watching a live band which can be done virtually. I have nothing against virtual sessions. I thought about getting one myself during these times. It's just the word used. What's wrong with "virtual session"? To me, saying virtual cuddle is like saying that you're virtually eating a steak.
@Mike403 You're still going off dictionary definitions... so there's no point in arguing dictionary definitions; there's plenty of those online, and I'm sure we could toss links forever. If you're a piece of paper or a webpage, then dictionary definitions are great
Anyway, my definition of a concert includes smelling the air; it's a big deal in what makes it unique. I can't do that online of course, but I can have it described to me in a written review in an article the day after, and experience it virtually. Watching a band perform is like seeing a person, and is part of the cuddle experience, so a virtual concert is on the same relational level of a virtual cuddle.
If you just don't like the words "virtual" and "cuddle" together... OK, well, a "virtual session" through CuddleComfort is the same thing to me. The "session" part refers to the "cuddle" part. Virtually. If the virtual session is not a "cuddle", then it's a thing not specific to CuddleComfort. It's just a cam/phone/app chat. At least to me anyway. I don't get much out of those. I like the experience of an agreed-upon "cuddle", virtual or otherwise.
Anyway, you should try a virtual cuddle, at least before continuing to grip on the separation of "virtual" and "cuddle". You could simply be arguing semantics, but in my experience, a virtual cuddle is just that, a cuddle session that is done virtually (and I hope we have the same understanding of virtual haha).
I highly recommend it. When nobody's there, and the fleshlings flake out like they have this week, a damn virtual session will get my cuddle feels done a lot better than than a blah real-life one. Peace out.
@pmvines @Mike403 Fun to read your comments. They actually make a little gizmo for girls to pee without taking their pants off (it's like a funnel). I actually have perfect aim when standing - the myth about women not being able to write their names in the snow is really just about lack of practice.
Now I've got your imaginations going!
@Sideon I know, same here. I imagine the older prim ones doing some kind of deep knee bend over the seat and pissing with abandon. And probably at home they give their husbands shit about their aim. I would find it all the more funny if I, as a non-toilet-seat-fearing wench, didn't have to choose between changing stalls, doing the same, or wiping up their pee. I've always wanted to rant about this, but where do you rant about such a thing? I want to rant at THEM. I want to give them all a good scientific lecture about their ridiculousness but I've never caught one in the act. FIe on them, fie! They are a public nuisance, those pee-spraying menaces! And i'm glad someone else can share in my horror and amusement. I now feel even more deeply bonded to you than I did before. Thank you. A shame we didn't meet when I was out in the Bay Area.
@littermate ~ I so badly want those leg lifting lady spray squatter types to slip in their own filth! But I have to keep it reined in because I don't ever want to be first on scene having to help one out. Eww!
Seriously though! Why can't they just use a wad of TP to lift the seat first?! So rude!
If I ever catch one, I'll probably just wash up real quick and call out a cautionary, "careful, it's slippery when wet..." then dash out the door and hope she didn't see my shoes.
And so true about practice! I took the kids out to the lava flows and after a bit my little cousin dropped her pants and from three feet away got all of it into an 8" tree cast! I was stunned!
I asked her if her brother taught her that and she slowly turned, looking at me as if thoroughly disgusted, and while pulling her pants up flatly said, "No. Grandma did."
@littermate you can also use stencils to write your name in the snow
