That is all
Lonliness sucks is a declaration. What is the question?
I strongly disagree. It's entirely possible to enjoy loneliness instead of suffering it.
Do the work on your own personal growth and loneliness will disappear.
So for me, definitely happy :-)
@Siberian76 I beg to disagree. I believe you are confusing loneliness with being alone. You can be perfectly happy while being alone, but loneliness by definition suggests a sad feeling associated with it. Even in your words, you seek to do something to make it disappear. Can we learn something from our sense of loneliness? Of course, but that isn't the same as "enjoying" it.
Nah
... because they spoke to me ...
I am experiencing real loneliness for the first time and well I don’t think I can handle it much longer
@verona ~ I'm sorry to hear that.
If you'd ever like to talk, or just have someone on the line to connect with in silence, I'd be happy to PM my number to you...
Verona! Message me! I get lonely too!
Suffering person, timidly reaching out: Loneliness sucks.
Internet strangers: Your crying out is not welcome here on a site for people seeking comfort. It's your own fault, anyway. You just gotta pull yourself out of it. Cheers!
Gee, thanks.
I'm sorry, ChibiShema, Verona, and Dobieprince! Boy do I hear you. I am dying over here in loneliness.
@verona I'm sorry to hear that. I'm always up for a chat
@DrCuddleBug
I believe you are confusing loneliness with being alone.
I don't think I am. I have been experiencing loneliness quite a lot in last 5 years. But, I read [in some smart books] suggestions and I embraced the self-discovery process. It was quite painful, but it worked.
I have successfully disappeared loneliness. So, it's true that it's possible. There were many things I didn't believe would happen to me [when I read those books], but they actually did. All of them. And more. So much more...
You can be perfectly happy while being alone, but loneliness by definition suggests a sad feeling associated with it.
For me, to be perfectly happy alone came further down the path of self-discovery. About a year after I disappeared loneliness, as there was other stuff to process and mend in my heart. No sad feelings associated with it anymore, for me.
Even in your words, you seek to do something to make it disappear.
Correction: I seeked, as in, in past. There is nothing to disappear anymore, for me. I have not experienced loneliness in 2 years despite living in isolation, in the middle of nowhere. In past, in those 2 years, I would have had dozens of 'bouts of loneliness. Yes, they sucked. And they would have sucked to this day and till the day I die if I didn't choose to do something about it.
@NicoBoco
Your crying out is not welcome here on a site for people seeking comfort. It's your own fault, anyway. You just gotta pull yourself out of it. Cheers!
I appreciate the gentle sarcasm, I really do
But let's get something straight here: It's NOT your fault you experience loneliness. It IS your fault, however, if you don't make a decision to do something about it once you have been made aware that there is a solution.
It's infinitely easier to wallow in self-pity and negative feedback loop of self-deprecation compared to the RAW PAIN of spiritual growth and self-healing.
Hell, you could stay miserable till the day you die, if that's what you wish!
***** I Can't make you see The Light. You have to step out of the Darkness. *****
Loneliness is the narrative we give to ourselves and our experience while being alone.
When I was in the middle of my divorce with my first husband, I was so lonely. I was living with my sister and I had people around me that loved me and cared for me, but I still felt lonely. It was not a good feeling. I had to push my mind to work on things to better myself and my situation. Even though I was in an abusive marriage of 8 years, I still wanted to go back. Why?! I hated myself for thinking it was purely because I didn’t want to feel alone. I worked hard, got my own place, got my drivers license and worked from the bottom. Now I am happily married to an amazing supportive husband. The memory of being alone and feeling bitter loneliness is just that: a memory. I had to go through 8 years of an abusive jerk and months and months of crying and screaming into my pillow during the divorce to get to where I am now. Everyone’s experience is different. Some get handed togetherness so easily while others have to come to terms with what’s been given. Spend that time connecting with friends and bettering yourself, and that healthy happiness will come to you eventually. It could take 8 horrible abusive years or it could be next week. Patience is key.
@Siberian76 thank you for affirming what I said. by your own words the loneliness tht you once experienced was painful (not enjoyable). You have gained from it. Bravo. You have learned to embrace being alone, while the sense of loneliness is no longer a factor.
Thanks for the affirmation.
I've never really been all that lonely even when I am alone . I feel I am pretty content and at peace, and am able to entertain myself and self soothe , and my mind is always occupied with something. To be honest , I kind of prefer being alone during the bulk of my spare time . I have enough interaction and stimulation with work and family stuff . I enjoy being able to shut down and relax with myself .
I'm quite comfortable being alone. I've been alone most of my life. I'm an introvert and don't need other people to be happy.
I call that freedom @quixotic_life. But I've had a lot of love in my life and a lot of healing. So solitude isn't a gap out of which gnarly bogeymen rise or howling infant states emerge because I let those suckers rise and do their terrible dances and now they are all sleeping in hammocks in my heart.
@verona Sorry to hear but you’re not alone. This year has been particularly depressing but stay strong. We will all get through this. Find someone honest to hopefully bring some cheer, if not as a community we are here for you.
@quixotic_life I am late but that quote from Bukowski seems like the difference between the anxious and the avoidant (neither are good).
Sorry if I offended...
I often slip into the vast void of loneliness and feel the raw, gut wrenching pain that comes with it. Sometimes it's so intense it makes me physically ill.
I shared because there have been times I've needed reminding that, no matter what, I still have choice. And it makes me feel a little bit better.
You have learned to embrace being alone, while the sense of loneliness is no longer a factor.
No, you are twisting it now.
I am not embracing loneliness. There's no loneliness to embrace anymore.
When I grew emotionally and spiritually, the loneliness disappeared. That's it. Though, that may sound simple (it wasn't).
I only embraced the pain of the healing process and that pain has disappeared the loneliness (along with all kinds of other crap in my psyche).
Nothing else in my life has changed, just the healing. I already was isolated, I already quit my daily job and I already had a Husky. But once I did the necessary spiritual healing, that disturbing and disgusting feeling of loneliness finally disappeared.
It is incredibly liberating to not have to tolerate crap from anybody (especially romantic partners) due to fear of loneliness- I simply get up and leave as I am perfectly happy just by myself and if the other person is not treating me as I deserve, I simply go back to my full happiness without the other person
I only wish I could do that 2 decades ago, but better late than never, eh
@quixotic_life i wasn't offended i probably worded it poorly. I was actually hoping people would search 'anxious and avoidant' and find out about attachment styles.
I've never really been all that lonely even when I am alone . I feel I am pretty content and at peace, and am able to entertain myself and self soothe , and my mind is always occupied with something. To be honest , I kind of prefer being alone during the bulk of my spare time . I have enough interaction and stimulation with work and family stuff . I enjoy being able to shut down and relax with myself . @pmvines
I really like this comment, I wasn’t always there but today I absolutely get it!
Suffering person, timidly reaching out: Loneliness sucks. Internet strangers: Your crying out is not welcome here on a site for people seeking comfort. It's your own fault, anyway. You just gotta pull yourself out of it. Cheers! Gee, thanks. I'm sorry, ChibiShema, Verona, and Dobieprince! Boy do I hear you. I am dying over here in loneliness.
Totally nailed it, @NicoBoco
@CuddleStella Nah. The ONLY time I've felt lonely, was when an abusive person shared my life and my bed.
I've NEVER felt lonely while being alone.
@ChibiShema I hope you gold a viable solution, soon
It depends on the person. Some people need human interaction, Some people do not. I live alone, I sleep alone and I eat along . I am alone but I am not lonely.
@MaullySterling Right, it's better to have no company than bad company. But we are all here hoping to cuddle someone nice.
well have you tried (platonically) sucking back?