Is my profile unattractive?

Zionscalling

I'm kinda requesting some help here. I live (essentially) in San Diego, a wonderful city on the Southern California coast where there is plenty of people to meet and mingle with. It's not too uncommon to jump onto CC and at the start see a new member that just signed up for cuddles who either lives in San Diego or within 80 miles of this location. 
I feel like since I logged on and saw them, initiating an interaction is placed in my hands. I usually start with a very generic greeting as in: "Hello! Welcome to the website! I hope you have many wonderful experiences from here. What brought you to the website?" And unfortunately that's where a lot of the interaction ends. I'd say about a solid 99% of them don't continue past that point, though they'll log on, come to my profile and take a look. So I hope they know I can see when I get a visitor because that's a standard feature given to all of us on this site... But still no responses.
So if it doesn't bother anyone who comes across this thread I'll ask: Please come to my profile and take a look. My profile isn't too intensive but I feel like there is something I've selected or said in my bio or maybe a picture etc... that is making me highly unattractive to people I attempt to communicate with. Please, you can be brutally honest and rip me a new one for all I care (I've found an odd inner peace that makes this website no longer very necessary to my life though my overwhelming "success" [sarcasm] doesn't aid in me staying around either...) on this thread. Of course, friendliness is welcomed and well received, but if you are overwhelmingly offended by something, don't be too shy to let me know. Please and Thank you to all! =]

Doesn't come across as an unattractive pic, Zionscalling. Don't take my word for it, though, as I seem to have the EXACT same problem as you. Hahahaha

@Zionscalling - great profile. Good pix, good profile information.  My only suggestions are: 1. Spellcheck words you aren't 100% how to spell and maybe rewrite the last part of the last sentence in your profile. Yes it seems anal but a lot of women find spelling errors and mumbled grammar a turnoff. (Better go double check mine now).

This is only my personal preference but the "Hello! Welcome to the website! I hope you have many wonderful experiences from here" is 'nice' but comes off as a bit robotic and insincere. Or like you work for the website and are giving a very formal greeting.  I just pick something very specific from their profile - or if they don't have a profile - I pick something from their image that catches my eye and open with that. 

Before any of that I check to see how long it's been since they have been active on the site. 

But from my standpoint you're doing everything right.  Good attractive pix, good energy and good etiquette. 

I'm in Sunny LA and there are quite a few cuddle parties in my area so you might want to check out those in the SD area as well.

Good luck!

@Zionscalling - I've learned in life that when we fail to pursue what we REALLY need, we experience outcomes we don't desire. We then sometimes misinterpret these outcomes and think something must be wrong with us.

Maybe cuddling is not what you really need. Maybe it's a whole relationship. Try spiritualsingles.com...response rates on the site are AMAZING compared to ANY meet up site I've ever been on.

Just a thought

Sweetandsnug

Your profile has a good vibe to it! It's warm, inviting, and starts with a bit of humor. I do agree with chococuddles about the kind of "stock" message you've referenced. Compared to the rest of your profile it does sound a bit more impersonal even if it's genuine. Locate specific things that catch your attention that make you feel as though someone would make a great cuddle buddy for you. I wish you luck on your search  ^_^

CuddleGem

Hi Zion,

Hope you're well & happy. 

You'd asked for feedback- so here goes- that pic is rather disturbing as it seems violent and cuddling turning into violence is a terrifying fear most women have. It took me a while to realize that the airport guy pinging his fingers at you like a gun is a statue. Funny now but not funny at first. 

Perhaps you can post a couple of lovely pictures of you smiling into the camera and either remove or make the current pic the third?

Making your profile more personal & warm might help. Perhaps explain what kind of cuddler you are & let us in to your world more...

Hope it helps. 

Good Luck!

CuddleGem

Hey Patchwork Man- 
unsolicited help here- your current profile photo makes you look scary. 
& I counted 5 references which, in combination with your severe pic, could scare off potential cuddlers- madman, terrorist etc
i see where you're going with your profile but I think many gals would be hard-pressed to get past the combo. 
Youve a handsome mug- how about having a great picture taken? Post several- a warm, smiling headshot would help you enormously. 
Many gals have a hard time trusting no-smiles or no-teeth-pseudo smiles. 
Let your light shine!
Good Luck!
PS
i need pro headshot too.

It's all metaphor and creative language. The reason for metaphor and creative language is it's a filter of my own....I'd seek a cuddle partner who is aware of these things and doesn't take life too seriously. I have, in fact, met a few wonderful individuals here and have ZERO complaints. As far as my smile: I don't smile much by nature, never have. I have this unusual condition called "resting douche face." lol
It doesn't mean I'm scary, bad, or creepy.(hell, ask anyone who has bothered to get to know me), it merely means I just don't have that nature. Comedy is, in fact, part of my performance art stuff.

@zioncalling I wouldn't let it get you down and I wouldn't use this as your only avenue to find a cuddle buddy. I've actually never found a cuddle buddy on this site. I use this site because I enjoy the community in the message boards and for the professionals. The professionals on here have been absolutely amazing. There are many other ways to meet people and find a cuddle buddy and it doesn't have to be specifically on a cuddling site. Just remember that there are a lot of people in the world, you're looking for a female so I'll specify females, they're are a lot of girls in the world that would be thrilled to know you and there are some that will be happy to cuddle with you. One of my closest female friends who I cuddle with all the time, I met at the grocery store. Keep at it and don't let it get you down. 

Zionscalling

Thank you to all who responded to this thread. I've taken advice of most of you who recommended certain changes and I can actually say, my success has increased 100%! Well, that's not a lie, because I've only tried talking to one person since I made the change but that one person did respond to me! 

And to answer to those that think was down about not getting responses, I really wasn't. I just thought it was kinda strange how this happened. As I said at the origin of this discussion, I've found unexpectedly an odd inner peace that really eliminates my desire to be around/cuddle people. 

And as as for the few that said basically "try a relationship," I'm 100% not mentally ready to be in a relationship. I thought I needed that too but I'm not sure that it would be healthy for me or the unfortunate soul that engages in said title with me. 

But it once again, thank you all! More comments and critiques are always welcomed. =]

So much for the "non-judgemental"

@Zionscalling - My advice would be to be less wordy. I have this issue, also, because I'm verbose and I'm a writer so I tend to write long winded anything. But people don't read and long paragraphs usually frighten people into skipping over you. Maybe they feel you're going to be annoyingly chatty when they want to cuddle in peace... or maybe they just don't want to be that involved in our lives?  Who knows, but for me it seems the less words I use the more responses I get. 

So... my advice would be to make a shorter profile and just hit the main points. Introduce yourself, briefly describe yourself, and leave all the specifics for private chat when you find someone to reply. Listing every cuddle position you like to do is conversation for your buddy, I think, not for the world.

I don't think there is a "correct" way to make a profile so take all our advice with a grain of salt. Mostly we're Males and Males have a difficult time finding a girl to trust us so be prepared for a lot of heartache finding a stranger to cuddle. I've been looking to replace my old cuddle buddy that I moved away from off and on for a year now and haven't met anyone. I'm kinda picky and they're kinda flaky so that's my situation... but sincerely best of luck to you!

.

Katota

There is no correct way or incorrect way when it comes to profile information, in my opinion. Whether it's lengthy chock-full of information or whether you just type one to three words (or sentences). It doesn't matter, because not everyone reads profiles or they'll just read certain "pop words" within and just "assume" the rest versus trusting the actual wording there (in said profile) themselves. 😊

I say put whatever information you want in your profile (or leave it blank many others do that too😄), whether others find it "attractive " or not. Your profile is about You, and the right person will be attracted to what you have to say in time. Just don't stress over it so much, it's quality your profile should be attracting not quantity. Lol! Eh!😄🤔
Then again if quantity is more important to you, that's okay too. Best of luck!😁

Bella_Sera

This thread is 7 years old, y'all--from 2016--and the OP hasn't logged in for 2 years. We can probably put it to bed?

Bear

@Bella_Sera love the meme. I thought it was a new thread because it looked unfamiliar recently. Then I saw how old it was and I’m like let’s see who brought it back to life and why. Great meme again.

MsCarissa23

@Zionscalling Hi Zion, I love ur name?! If that’s really it….however, your profile is private? Why not just show who you really are?! If people don’t like you then…..don’t take it personal. Everyone has experienced rejection and it’s not the end of the world! And I’m a bit confused by ur the information on ur profile? You said in this thread that your from San Diego but ur profile says you live in Hayward…did you recently move to San Diego? I would update that and I’m very familiar with Hayward….I went to CSUEB! Did you? I probably graduated before you…but ok my fellow Pioneer! Lol…Also are you mixed? It says ur Latino but I can’t really tell from ur picture….I think you should unlock ur photos and show the real you! You might not be for everyone and that’s okay, but someone will want you! You seem like a cool person and I hope you get ur first cuddle session soon…..🥰🥰🙌🏾

jplemmon

Everyone, this was from seven years ago. I wouldn't hold your breath on a response lol

CuddleHugs01234

Yep, he was last active two years ago.

Zionscalling

Hello Everyone! Currently extremely busy at the moment, only hopped on to revisit a different thread that randomly came out in conversation about this website. I'll come back and answer any questions just to present some resolution. Just trying to put out good energy! Will send everyone private messages unless anyone has questions the want to ask further in this thread. Sorry to revive the thread. Hope everyone is finding great success here.

Bella_Sera

@Zionscalling, if you’re back, the people want updates! Did you ever find a cuddle buddy? Did you check out spiritualsingles.com? Is that why you’ve been gone so long? Are you mixed? (Such an awkward question, lol) How did you remember your password after 7 years?!

The people need answers!

Katota

Ha! 😆I didn't even check OP's last activity status. Lol!🤭 It's all gravy, I still stand by my response from...Uhh, 1, 2, 4...6 MONTHS AGO!☝️😁🖐

Lol.😁😆😄

Question is: Will OP take a break from being busy for 2 yrs straight to even read or take to heart my well intended and thought out response from 6 months ago?😄

My heart ♥ and soul 👻, went to that 6 month old response. Lol!😆😆😆

TxTom

That would actually be kind of cool---getting some kind of feedback on profiles, based on CC criteria. The praise, or the constructive criticism, could be either anonymous or not.

Although I don't know if that would be very useful, or serve any practical purpose.

pmvines

Me -is my profile unattractive?

People -no but you're kind of a dick

great_pillow08

What??

WestsideMarc

This OP was originally made 8 years ago, but his current profile basically indicates he has no interest in cuddling at all so maybe this thread should be closed out by the mods?

Zionscalling

@Bella_Sera: Hi!

• So I did end up finding a long term cuddle buddy, but not from this website! I'm actually polyamorous with 2 partners. I don't know if spiritualsingles.com was ever for me, but maybe I'll see what the people are like there though I'm not necessarily single. Dating/social websites are interesting to me and I love hearing about peoples experiences!
• I was gone from the app because I actually cannot delete my profile on here. The "delete profile" button literally doesn't work for me though I see it work for others consistently. Kinda thankful now a days for that because I am really enjoying seeing how far I've come as a person and thankful for the eons of growth I've experienced since the last time I was truly on, being about 5ish years ago.
• This is such an odd question but I think its great! No, not not technically mixed. 1/8 German, the rest of me is Central American from Nicaragua! =]
• How did I remember my password from 7 years ago? Trauma. LOLOLOL.

@Katota: Hello! So your answer to my thread question was very solid. The right person would come for sure, and at the right time. Back then, I wasn't in the best place mentally and was desperate trying find answers to my loneliness. I've truly found inner peace and in a wonderful poly relationship with two gorgeous people, internally and externally. Patience, luck and resourcefulness got me to where I am now a days and very thankful for what I have.

@CuddleGem: How goes it! Well, I kinda disagree on the "violence" of my picture of me imitating getting poked in the eyes, but maybe it was hard to see me actually smiling in that photo because the photographer was hilarious with her commentary. I think you came across my profile a little later too because I did have an about me section that was pretty well thought out explaining who I am and what brought me to the site. Either way, I'm genuinely thankful for your outlook and input to the thread. =]