@quincyq03
Hey, misunderstandings happen, you are free to clarify yourself, as you just did, at any time.
"I don’t have a justifiable need to pay for cuddling." That's great for you! Let's just make sure not to make statements that insinuate that those sentiments extend beyond yourself and your own personal preferences.
I offered some cuddlers I thought may be a good fit as a result of the criteria you stated, if you already have had meaningful experiences and people you've made connections with then there's nothing more to say. 😊
You seemingly had some hangups regarding pros that seemed to be rooted in lack of options, seeing as you have options, the premise of your issue seems to be different than the one you might have communicated?
Why others may choose to pay is a personal and separate question entirely, which I gave an answer to already in this thread.
I do apologize if you've been misunderstood in any way.
I was just answering with the knowledge I had available (for example with no karma, I wouldn't assume you've made a connection yet!).
@Nature_Lover_ Can I set up a doubles session with you and your mummy?
@quincyq03 You are right that I should also consider facts and experiences on all sides, including yours. I failed to ask you directly what your experiences included and simply drew a conclusion based on the limited facts I gathered from your sharing thus far. I failed to do something key ; seek first to understand. Not intentional and I appreciate you bringing this to my attention.
I do feel some of the statements you have made about folks come off as over generalizations which can be inaccurate and potentially inflammatory or harmful. When you say for instance, there are two types of people on this platform and name one group as people who are enthusiastic to cuddle and those who are paid to cuddle ~ That may in many cases be true though in many also not true. For instance, I absolutely love getting to cuddle and connect with people. The focus as a provider being compensated for my time is always my clients’ needs and their experience but I get so very much out of exactly that. Also as a single mom this is a safe space for me to get my physical needs for touch and connection met as well. No two sessions are the same but many clients get more out of giving so an ideal session for them might include me being little spoon, them playing with my hair or just deep and stimulating conversations. The reality is many of the amazing people who have entrusted me with this emotional and physical proximity I would have never encountered in my normal circles. All of the above makes my heart fat and full of gratitude. I am fortunate to be able to provide a service so valuable and so impactful and even more blessed to be able to benefit from providing such a service as well. Call it flow 😊
With respect to considering your experiences, I apologize if I mischaracterized you as having not cuddled in all of the capacities you just disclosed. I also fully respect that that have feelings as to what would be fair pricing or that perhaps cuddling should be non transactional and I do hear you. Luckily this platform encompasses many options and they are all elective.
Another side note would be that many of the amazing paid pr pro cuddlers on the site care deeply about expense being an inhibiting factor for those who need such services and offer discounts, barter, and are even exploring options such as grants to further enable affordable access.
With respect to me stating you are dictating what other should or shouldn’t do that was based on a comment you made on the hand holding post in which someone stated that folks may not want to hold hands due to an aversion to germs or issues concerning autism ( please refer to that post to verify exact wording ). Your reply to that person’s opinion is that people who are germaphobic ect shouldn’t be trying to cuddle on a cuddle site or people that aren’t ok with handholding shouldn’t be pursuing cuddling and again, these are not exact quotes but those types of statements across multiple threads give me an impression that you have strong opinions about what others should or should not do whether it’s respect to cuddling, charging ect. I also feel strongly about that ~ I feel that anyone who needs or wants to seek cuddling or companionship should do so in any capacity they choose. Even those who may have obstacles, have different boundaries ect.
But at the end of the day, I feel that it’s important that you know I am hearing you, I respect you and your opinions are welcome even if they offend. When we respect one another even when discussing divisive issues we can better understand one another, and potentially learn and grow. No one deserves to be attacked and sometimes when we are in a defensive mode we can feel as though we are being attacked. I assure you, I don’t have any negative feelings towards you, I encourage you to do whatever best serves you by way of sharing or posting within the forums, cuddling on or off site, transactionally or otherwise, and truly wish you the best.
@Nature_Lover_ another complete mischaracterization of what I said.
I did not say that people who are germaphobic shouldn’t be cuddling.
I said “if you have sensory and/or germ issues, in most cases, you probably wouldn’t like cuddling either.”
In most cases (not all cases), one probably (probable, but not certain) wouldn’t like cuddling. My interpretation was that if a cuddler was avoiding holding hands, there might be something else going on there, but let’s please stay on topic and not make this all about me.
@Gallowglass I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I love networking with other pros! I’ve attached a photo of a couple of them, so feel free and to send a booking request 🤣
@quincyq03 thank you for clarifying the over generalization.
@quincyq03 You're coming across as a bit charged when @Nature_Lover_ and I both seem to be making a genuine effort to understand and not offend you.
I understand it's really frustrating to be misunderstood, but between your short responses that don't address the entirety of what's being said, in addition to the language and format of your messages, it's not a great look.
@SleepySheep1 thank you for the cuddler recommendations in my area, I’ll be sure to expand my search criteria! 🥰
No problem, and I must emphasize again, truly not trying to offend or be presumptuous.
I'm sorry if anything was less than helpful or not what you were intending to communicate. ✌
@SleepySheep1 it’s okay, I should apologize too. I haven’t been on here much lately because I haven’t seen many locals on recently, but you proved me wrong. That doesn’t give me the green light to be harsh and make unfair generalizations.
Guyzzzzz, this is what I’m talking about !!
🤗 🤗 🤗
I feel that, Connecticut often feels like a wasteland over here too sometimes. 🥲
@SleepySheep1 I actually lived in Connecticut for most of my life. Surprisingly uninspiring, despite being so close to Boston and New York.
HONESTLY.
I think about leaving All. The. Time.
But Manchester is pretty nice and it's charm seduces me. 🙄
@SleepySheep1 Oh, don't leave. CT needs you.
*"Here’s the deal apple peel..." ~ @Nature_Lover_ *
🏃♀️¤ ~ Shoink! I'm stealing that!!
Three other things I wanted to mention... 1st - That was the best Ted Talk on CC I've ever been to! Highly recommend!! 🌟👏👏👏
2nd - Omg! Coffin Cuddles?!! (kinda odd someone could slide the glass over and watch you snuggle in there then set their coffee on you... but still... yay for you!! 🧛♀️
3rd - Wtf with the damn clowns!! Spoilers and warnings are a thing ya know?! [I did not consent to that] 🤡
And @SleepySheep1 ~ You are so flippen fabulous!! I'm so glad you're here on CC!! 💖
@quixotic_life Thanks lol and also, you are so right, I should have given a trigger warning for the clowns!! 🤣🤣🤣
clowns... ok. so THAT's why I passed out.
I believe that only 4 states in the U.S. do not regulate massage therapy. That being the case, I would not say that “many” do not regulate massage. 92% of states in the U.S. regulate the practice of massage therapy. Within those unregulated states some municipalities regulate the practice of massage therapy.
MTs in the U.S. do not go to school for years, it’s more like a year. Cost of MT education tends to be between $6,000 - $12,000.
In unregulated states literally anyone can call themselves a massage therapist unless more local jurisdictions require training, usually minimal.
I finally got a hammock after years of living without. One of the things I like about it is the sensation of being cradled. In some ways it mimics cuddling. I’d take a hammock over a coffin.
Temple Grandin made a “hugging machine” for herself that would give her a whole body squeeze. You can see one here:
@Babichev "I'd take a hammock overa coffin" 😂 Indeed! If I do wind up in St. Louis in May it'll be primarily to meet you! (I hope that is not too alarming to hear!) I'm presently in the process of getting my Arizona LMT by reciprocity. I've been in Philly for the past 8 years. Massage therapy profession has opened me up to a life that I didn't know was waiting for me. I hope we can chat about that?
WOW!!!! @Nature_Lover_ this is my first time seeing this. This is very very interesting!!!!! This is what being creative is all about.
Being able to get so relaxed holding somone and than waking up holding them.. not having to worry about time or anything for a bit.. in sleep and the times just before and just after being completely our relaxed selves.. sounds so cozy..
@CozyWolfy it is an unforgettable and exciting experience!!!!!
@Babichev Thats an awesome link and great facts / info ! The concept of the hug machine makes perfect sense, especially with regard to calming the nervous system but I feel like I might be a bit claustrophobic in one at first 🤪
@Gallowglass apologies for the clowns! I forget not everyone is accustomed to “scary” props staged around their homes 🤣🤷♀️
As for the hammock ~ I am currently in one and with the remnants of today’s warm sunshine covering me like a blanket I can honestly say it does feel like a hug, or being held 💗
@Connecticut1977 Thanks! I’m not sure if you meant the coffin was creative or just my personal drive to better understand the people who entrust me with their emotional and physical proximity but I will say I don’t take it for granted. I am learning and growing and yet still am fully aware that I am a warm body and a kind soul. It’s not my job to advise folks or fix them in any such way though I do very much enjoy knowing people who are getting their needs for physical touch met within a safe space such as cuddling through this platform ((myself included)) are seeing improvements within their lives and are feeling better, and in many cases are now thriving. 💗
@Nature_Lover_ you have done a great job so far with helping others. I hope to one day meet you. I would be honored!!!
Well one must a LOT OF CASH to spare for night session…lol. At over 500 bucks for an entire night, ay Dios. Who has that kind of cash?
Self care is really important ~ So if one can find the means, why not?? I can see that as being a really nice splurge for some to do for themselves.
It's just a couple more layers of goodness.
Even during a short session, if I nap, the cares of the day, flee. So, on top of the cuddle chemical cocktail, by doing an overnight you simmer in them, like a slow-cooker. I've done one over-night and it is still with me years later. If you are at all in a position to consider it, I highly recommend it from my personal experience.
@Connecticut1977 that is some serious praise and it would be so great to connect with you as well! Thank you!