Boundaries and Black Balling

GabaGaba
in Professional Cuddling

Professional cuddlers can sometimes label you as a boundary pusher when you do not submit to their offer to perform other non platonic services . Professional cuddlers talk to other cuddlers and tell them you are off limits .Of course no one giveskarma saying don't cuddle with him because he only wanted platonic cuddling .it's much easier to make up a lie to keep someone from getting cuddling .I know this is not what all cuddlers do .The site is now full of non platonic cuddlers who are ruining it for the good ones . Cuddle comfort should do better screening for professional cuddlers who really want to provide a good cuddling experience .Pheraps some kind of a training before professional cuddler status is designated .There are far too many booking off the site not paying the fee to cuddle comfort .Will these things stop . probably not ..I welcome any thoughts or comments on this .

Comments

  • Sheena123Sheena123

    The unpaid moderators are doing the best they can. To help combat this, it’s up to all of us to keep reporting those that solicit and those that push boundaries. I hope you’re doing your part to report as well

  • GabaGaba

    I have reported the incidents that were experienced by me . unfortunately nothing happened and I was reprimanded and am now being refused cuddling because of baseless accusations .

  • Sheena123Sheena123

    Unfortunately, sometimes if the report is a “he said/she said” scenario, they don’t usually ban someone. But the report is on that persons profile so if anyone else makes a report against this person, that could help push this person out. I’m sorry you’re having a rough go.

    I’m not sure what you mean though when you say you’re being refused cuddling. As in, by every single cuddler around you? I’m a bit confused.

  • GabaGaba

    Yes I was told I had e reputation as a boundary pusher when I requested a cuddle from a professional. It's very disturbing to me to have that reputation .

  • Sheena123Sheena123

    You mentioned before that not all cuddlers do this so hopefully you find a pro that is able to cuddle with you and you’re able to show them that you don’t push boundaries and you are here for purely platonic reasons. Good luck 🤞

  • GabaGaba

    Thank you so much for the encouragement .I appreciate your input Sheena 123.

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan

    You're not the first to face this problem. It's something I do worry about, not least because it's not clear what, if anything, can be done. It's very difficult to do anything in the she said/he said situations, and the women professionals tend to get the benefit of the doubt because in the majority of cases it is indeed the client who is really the problem.

  • GabaGaba

    Cuddle Duncan very good point .

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan
    edited April 2022

    My problem solving/advice giving side has kicked in ..... I hope you find the following helpful and if not, my apologies. This is something that has been in the back of my mind for a long time and your post has brought it to the front.

    It seems to me that there are two things you can do. Firstly, make your profile look more like that of a typical trouble-free cuddler than a problematic client. There is of course no way of telling what a person is really like from their profile, but there are statistical pointers. Genuine cuddlers profiles tend to have some or all of the following characteristics. (Boundary-pushing types tend to have photoless profiles with little or nothing on them.)

    • Profile photo suitable for cuddling (if you don't want to post one of you, you can see some example of alternatives if you look throught he forum)
    • Several more pictures of themselves (you can set to Private, which results in a padlock icon on the main photo, showing you have uploaded pictures)
    • Profile text of two or three paragraphs, written in correct English without typos (you can use Word or its free equivalents to help you with correcting the text, if this isn't one of your strong points)
    • Friends
    • Karma
    • Forum posts

    I appreciate that you are an experienced member but you may find one or two tips you don't know in this thread:

    Secondly, Karma. The kind of professionals you are currently attempting to book are connected to each other, so broaden your horizons. I appreciate this may be difficult if travelling is hard for you. If somebody declines to see you explain the circumstances and see what happens. In any event, always be polite and respectful no matter what. (The problematic types usually fly off the handle eventually. Actually the mostly fly off the handle at the first opportunity, no matter how trivial.) If a couple of people leave good Karma for you, you will be back in business.

    Edit: I would also add that you have not been banned. If the mods are clear that somebody has done something inappropriate, they are gone in an instant. In other words, in your case the circumstances are sufficiently opaque to the mods that they have felt that they cannot fairly do anything at all.

  • GabaGaba

    Cuddle Duncan thank you for the tips .I will definitely use some of them .I think I am already using quite a few .I have learned a lot here today .

  • [Deleted User]sarahsmith (deleted user)

    Hello

  • Sheena123Sheena123

    @sarahsmith Hey, just letting you know you need to apply and be approved as a pro before you can charge. Once you go through the process, get accepted and have a pink P on your profile, just like the one I have, you can charge and call yourself a pro.
    Good luck!

  • GabaGaba

    I understand about becoming a pro.i just think a lot of people slip through the process who are not really here for cuddling .there is no way to stop this under the present system .

  • Sheena123Sheena123

    @Gaba the message I wrote was for the woman that said hello. On her profile, she’s talking about charging and details about her session, which is a no no since she isn’t a pro cuddler.

  • GabaGaba

    Oh ok
    I have actually run into that a few times .I think someone is a cuddling enthusiast and then they mention charging to cuddle .

  • Sheena123Sheena123

    @Gaba if they do that, report them. They are not allowed to charge if they are only enthusiasts.

  • GabaGaba

    Yes of course .I have and will continue to do so .

  • Sheena123Sheena123

    @Gaba good job!!! 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

  • BabichevBabichev

    I’ve seen several instances where pros have given one star karma to a member and stated quite clearly that the offender was a boundary pusher.

    Definitely report anyone who is trying to charge for cuddling who does not have a pro account.

    There are thousands of pros on this site with new ones every day. We rely on members to report anyone who is not following the terms of service.

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