A number of members, often pros, have expressed a reluctance to report members who have misbehaved for fear of retaliation. They want to know whether their reports are anonymous. I’d like to explain a bit about how reports work, when and how to report, and why it’s important to report members who violate the Terms of Service (TOS).
Why it’s important: We depend on members reporting profiles or members that violate the TOS. It’s the only way we have to keep the community safe. If someone sends you an inappropriate message or misbehaves during a cuddling session, there’s a good chance you are not the first nor the last person they will do that with. If you don’t let us know they will probably continue to do it to others. I’ve been dismayed to find, when investigating a report, that a member may have sent an inappropriate message to a dozen pros before someone reported them.
How to report: Near the top of their profile, under their photos, you should see a small box with three dots. Click on that and one of the options will be to report. You also have the option to block that member, too. Once you click on “Report” you’ll have a number of options as to the reason you’re reporting. There’s also a box where you can supply details. Alternatively, at the bottom of the page of your conversation with them should be that same small box with three dots.
They blocked me, I can’t report them: Even if you were blocked (or you blocked them) you can report them. If you go to their page, it still should show up as an option. Also, at the bottom of the page of your conversations with them should be that same box with the three dots. If they have deleted their profile but did something really bad, please contact one of the moderators. There is a period of time when their profile is not public but visible to mods and we can still ban them. This will make sure that if they return under a different account, we still have a record of their past behavior. Also, they have a period of time when they can reactivate their account and that report will stay on their record.
When to report: If a member is violating the terms of service, please report them. Common examples: sending non-platonic messages/making non-platonic or inappropriate requests, including sending photos that violate the terms of service; profiles that violate the terms of service i.e. inappropriate photos, inappropriate language, non-pros charging money, someone who is underage; non-pros telling you in messages that they charge for cuddling. If a member has been previously banned and returns under another account, please report it and supply the name on their previous account. If a member misbehaves during a session, please report them. This could be annoyingly pushing boundaries, asking to engage in non-platonic activity, asking to cuddle in underwear, to grosser violations such as grabbing, groping, or being aggressive and/or forceful about unwanted touch. If you’re not sure, report. The mods will figure it out. If it doesn’t seem necessary to take action, we’ll skip it but there will still be a record of the report in case it becomes a recurring problem. It’s rare but occasionally we’ll get a member who repeatedly makes frivolous reports. In that case we’ll have a conversation with them about what they should and should not report. Also, just because a person has a lot of karma or has been on the site a long time does not mean you should not report them. Even people with lots of good karma who have been here for awhile misbehave and sometimes seriously. Some bad actors intentionally rack up a lot of good karma in the beginning and then use that to try to gain someone’s trust, then turn around and violate it. Report them.
What happens next: Most of the time you won’t hear anything about it. We may issue a warning to the member. We may just make a note of the report and skip it. The member might get banned. You won’t be contacted about any of this most of the time. However, if we need more information or if there is an problem that needs to be resolved, you may be contacted.
Is my report anonymous? Moderators are able to see who reported the member so that is not anonymous. The accused member is not notified of who reported them unless it’s necessary to resolve the problem. For instance, if a pro charged a deposit and then ghosted the client, we obviously need to name the client in trying to resolve this with the pro. However, members may figure out who reported them just by circumstances. If they have only cuddled with one person on the site and then were reported for misbehaving during a session they are going to figure out who reported them. In this respect, we cannot guarantee anonymity. Please don’t let that stop you from reporting bad behavior. We all depend on these reports to keep our community safe.
Here’s a link to our privacy policy regarding reports:
https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/site/privacy#reports
False reports: False reports are rare but they happen. Depending on the circumstances, a member may be banned if they are caught making a false report. Sometimes they are given a stern warning and allowed to remain but if they misbehave after that, they will be banned. If you think you were falsely reported, you can appeal.
I reported this person but they are still on this site: Many factors go into the decision of whether to ban someone or not. Also, a person may be banned and then given a second chance if it appears they sincerely have learned their lesson. You may not get the outcome you hoped for but that does not mean it was a waste of time. Your report is still on file and if that person misbehaves again, your report will add to the evidence of what action should be taken.
I was reported and I want to know who reported me: Sorry, we do not divulge that. If you were issued a warning and want to know exactly what it was that you said and to whom, we are not going to give you that information. All we can say is make sure your communication stays strictly platonic. “Joking” about non-platonic activity is not a good idea, especially with someone you don’t know. Neither is addressing women as “sexy,” etc. Use good judgement. This site is for platonic cuddling only. Stay within those boundaries. Go back and read the TOS and, if booking with a pro, the Client Agreement. We do enforce them. You’re expected to abide by them.
When not to report: If a person is just annoying you, block them. Being annoying is not a bannable offense. If you pursue a relationship with someone you meet on this site and take it off site and that relationship goes south, please don’t come back and report them. Once you take your relationship off site, that’s between you and that person.
I hope this sheds some light on how reporting works and why we need for members to report bad behavior. We are a community and it takes all of us to keep it safe.