@CuddleDuncan - This time, I'm going to side with @Mike403. Just because something may not be ok, doesn't mean that it's also illegal.
There is indeed an enormous difference between "I hate black people" and "I prefer to cuddle with white people"
The first statement indicates an active hatred. the second merely states a preference.
I prefer brunettes to blonds. I prefer older women to younger ones. If you think that either of those two statements suggest that I hate blonds or young women, then I think that you're being foolish this time.
Do you have any idea how many times I've been told (on this site) "I prefer younger men," or something similar? How many of them do you think actively hate their grandfathers? Were all of those women discriminating? They certainly were. Were the doing something illegal? They equally certainly, were not.
@cylee1180 You're right. Racial preference is often involved in all of those. And some cases, e.g., job prospects it's clearly inappropriate, while in others, e.g., romantic prospects it isn't.
It's illegal for employers to discriminate based on race because all races have the same abilities. When cuddling, people may have a PHYSICAL preference which is fine.
But a professional is offering a paid service. Legally, a business cannot discriminate based on race. If the member in question is not a pro, that's irrelevant. If they are, it violates TOS.
@CuddleDuncan You must be a real peach at parties. Probably see Racism everywhere. I have zero Qualms in pros discriminating on race, religion, sex, whatever. Find another one. There’s plenty of other women that will take your money. This isn’t getting an oil change. Women are in a VERY vulnerable situation, and if they don’t feel 100% comfortable, the session will go poorly.
for what its worth...the site does give you the option to list your own ethnicity and / or the ethnicity of a cuddler you are searching for... It also lets you leave those blank.
I’d like to add that a pro cuddlers contract used to say we can’t discriminate against age/sex/ethnicity and I was trying to find that to post here but I don’t see it in the contract anymore. It got removed?
I can see both sides of this.
On the one hand, personal preferences are what they are: personal. No one can change that and no one should be ashamed to have them.
On the other hand, I think it's one of those things that can be kept to yourself. If I prefer to cuddle with single people, I can have that preference, but I don't see the need of putting "SINGLE PEOPLE ONLY" in my bio. I'll just simply specify my parameters when I search. I can understand why someone would be offended by seeing that in someone's bio.
But..going back to the first hand...you can't do anything about it. If it's against the rules for a pro to openly discriminate and this person is a pro, then simply report them. If it's an enthusiast, ignore it and keep it moving.
@Sheena123 - I don't think it can be enforced. A pro cuddler can just choose not to respond and they will never know the reason
@CuddleDuncan It’s not that simple. Having prejudices isn’t the same as being racist. Racism is a belief, a choice and a way of treating people. Prejudice is a feeling. If someone is not comfortable around some particular group, they have a prejudice. They can’t necessarily help how they feel. They can however make choices to try to alleviate and change those feelings. Usually that is done simply by getting to know more people of that group. Usually such familiarity is enough to remove or at least lessen the prejudices.
Everyone has prejudices. It’s a natural thing to develop them. When you are exposed to the first example of some group of people, you naturally are going to assume other people of that group are similar. And it’s not always incorrect or harmful. If that first exposure was negative then you will likely have a negative prejudice against such people. Hopefully at some point you recognize the prejudice, realize that it is not well founded and take intentional steps to overcome it. But it is really quite different from racism. Racism could be thought of as a belief that your prejudices are well founded and a fair assessment of the way things really are. A racist person indulges in their prejudices. A non-racist person works to overcome them.
@dave31415 Agreed on racism and prejudice, both of which need to be somehow overcome or fixed. But then there's racial/ethnic preference which is often bad because it is a stand-in for racism and prejudice. But it can also be benign as in one Orthodox Jew wanting to date and marry another Orthodox Jew, or a black person wanting to date and marry another black person, or one white person wanting to date and marry another white person.
I think a lot of people missed the part where I said the word (open). Ofcourse no one can be forced to cuddle with someone they don't like. But imagine a sea of profiles that all say something like no Mexicans allowed or no Chinese please. It would make those groups feel unwelcome. So you want to avoid cuddling with Chinese be my guest but don't put it on your page like that and be openly discriminatory.
I’d say thanks for the warning, I’d prefer to cuddle with a better type of person.
@cuddleduncan your being overly dramatic. People can cuddle with who they want.
oh, its a rhetorical question ! yeah as a community we sometimes, maybe, like to over think this cuddling idea ! 😲
Yeah too many hypothetical scenarios to consider where potential feelings might or might not potentially be hurt, but for the sake of rhetorically stirring the pot, yes, that is not good and yes it would ?
I also don't think that cuddling for money should necessarily always be considered a business and be treated just like every other business. It's really more of a gray area. I doubt most paid cuddlers are paying taxes on their income or keep detailed books. If you want to treat it like a business you certainly can. But I'm sure many people just think of it as an informal side job like raking your neighbors leaves. It can be considered a kind of friendship as much it can be considered a business transaction even when money is involved. Call it a gift if you will. A way of thanking someone. Technically any income is taxable but in practice that's not how society treats it. Likewise applying the rules that we hold over businesses probably doesn't make that much sense either. That's why I say it's probably not illegal. No judge is going to have the opinion that this kind of thing violates the law.
You're performing a service in exchange for money. That makes it a business. Just because it's a side hustle doesn't mean it doesn't count as taxable income and the laws governing businesses do not apply.
@homeboy Romantic prospects is complex - there are preferences, and there's also racism. E.g. - While Asians sometimes marry other races, they usually veer towards more light skinned groups. Why? Some generational racism and some internalized biases towards lighter skinned folks (yt supremacy). Either that, or those groups are just better looking. Lol
@Melancholy The short answer is Pros cannot show discrimination but anyone else can. If you see a Pro discriminating please report them. If they aren't a Pro, they are free to make that choice of preference.