Is it also hard for others to find enthusiast cuddlers

AKW

Hey i hope all is well.

I’m a Cuddler from NJ. And i obviously used pros. And don’t mind it and I’m happy they are making money. But is it hard for other guys in the same or different areas to find other free cuddling enthusiasts ? I’m just out of work but still like that feeling of cuddling. Maybe I’m asking too much. But is this just a ME problem? Lol no pity party

No it’s quite common actually. Best bet is try and find someone new to the site who hasn’t gone pro yet, and may be willing. Best of luck

@AKW I think it’s pretty difficult to find a female enthusiast to cuddle with no matter where you’re located

CuddleWho

This is a very common issue that is brought up on the forum all the time. Yes, most men find it difficult to find female enthusiasts. In fact, I'd say meeting women is harder here than other just about anywhere else. (Of course men have it harder than women in other places too, it's just not quite so extreme as it is here.)

IMO there are 3 options, each with their own tradeoffs:

1. Just see pros. Costs money, but pretty easy.
2. Continue to look for enthusiasts here. This is doable, but you may face an extraordinarily high rejection rate, it may take a long time, you may go a while between cuddle partners, and you may find that you can't have any sort of standards or preferences at all - it's so rare that anyone even responds to your messages that you just have to go for it when it happens.
3. Meet women elsewhere. This may still be difficult or relatively easy, depending on you, but assuming you really do want platonic cuddles, the obvious problem is that they'll be disappointed and will likely leave when they realize you don't want sex.

SuperManCuddles

I have found messaged and cuddle enthusiasts women from many states. What helps me are searching my areas/other areas I don’t mind traveling too, sending many messages and establishing connection messaging/in person with the her. I wish you well. My last female enthusiast cuddle was last week, in my local area!

_marC

@justwanthugs is right! Your best bet is to find someone who is new and has either not gone pro/ (or had a bad experience causing them to leave cc)

sunnysideup

It’s definitely not a you problem and pretty widespread. In addition to what the others have stated,

Depending on the area, the ratio of men to women enthusiasts can range from 4:1 to 7:1. So a lot of women probably get burned out from too many requests.

Many if these messages are also harassing or not interesting. (When you regularly get cuddle requests, a simple Hey how are you might look too lazy).

Even if you do all the right things, you will likely not find a cuddle buddy any time soon, it takes some patience.

Participating in the forums, it puts you ahead of all the other enthusiasts that dont post, your next cuddle buddy could be an avid forum reader.

_marC

The forums = ahead of the rest! Yes! That's one way to look at the sunny side of things! Thanks @sunnysideup
🍳

Women who are enthusiasts are there but that’s where it ends.. if you want to cuddle, only option is pros. They are your saviors 😀
And to cuddle pros, you need to spend 💰

SunsetSnuggles

We exist. Best of luck finding us! 🤗

~ Sunset Snuggles

stormydaycuddle

@SunsetSnuggles You reminded me of Where's Waldo and Carmine San Diego.

SunsetSnuggles

@stormydaycuddle Oh man, right? 🎶 Where in the world is...Carmen Sandiego! 🎶 Fun memories.

I just left Colorado, I was there for two weeks visiting family! I grew up there. 🌄🌲🥰

~ Sunset Snuggles

OhioMike

@AKW have you looked into attending / or even assisting at the NYC Meet and Greet in April?

Only a few miles from you . The recent gatherings have enthusiasts / pros, etc. Great event to meet dozens of members for a few hours . One can make a lot of connections at these events! Happy cuddling 😊👍

PeopleLikeUs

I seem to be beating the odds both for gender and age. I have never cuddled a pro and I seem to meet my cuddle needs with an enthusiast-only approach.

I've had approximately 5 rewrites of my About section. This happens because I see something about someone else's profile that draws me in and I try to capture and apply their approach to myself. I have also reached out to folks that I feel are writers or therapists that can add insight to my profile. In discussing profile writing I've arrived at 3 important aspects that I've placed in the following order: What I intend to bring to the cuddle (or why someone would want to cuddle me), how I got into cuddling, and closing with what I expect to get out of a cuddle.

I also make it a point to not initiate a conversation about cuddling via messaging until I've met the person either in person or via video chat (All of my cuddles have been the result of IRL meetings). I am also prepared to spend as much time as it takes with messaging to arrive at an IRL situation.

I was into cuddling prior to joining CC and since CC I have acquired a knack for engaging in cuddles with friends. I am open around people I think are conducive to it. I was also referred as a cuddler to another enthusiast by my current cuddle buddy, and I've cuddled one pro who wanted to cuddle free twice.

Workshops are also very helpful.

I really believe that every person can attract to themselves the right person for enthusiast cuddles. It takes time, patience, and persistence. The most important part is in finding what works for you.

CuddleDuncan

Good advice from @OhioMike and @PeopleLikeUs.

You may also find these threads helpful:

• How I found happiness on Cuddle Comfort

• How I Found Happiness on CC Part 2: The First Meeting

Women enthusiasts do exist.

Many times we work other time demanding jobs and meeting to get to know others never lines up.

The St Louis gathering was the best way to ever meet others. I met two wonderful individuals who I had been communicating with for several months at that point.

They have put the effort in to get to know me and keep in contact, even those times I step back from the forums.

Both live out of state so seeing them does require planing and some effort to make sure all available time lines up.

I have been on several week long vacations and have been made to feel welcomed, safe and treasured as a cuddle companion and genuine friend.

We have thought about bigger bucket list trips. Several are in the possible 2024/25 planning stage.

It all depends on what you want out of this I guess. Sometimes you get lucky enough just to find the people you click with looking for the same.

Respect , clear boundaries, honest communication and being genuine goes a long way to building a lasting cuddleship.

I know my experiences may differ greatly from many enthusiast women on here. Younger more conventionally attractive women get absolutely overrun with requests.

Being, older, heavier and more sarcastic is likely off putting to most. And that's fine. I have found the very best cuddlers for me, and I treasure them.

strawhtluffy

It’s very difficult to find enthusiasts. Like mentioned above, the more active you are, the more likely you are to meet someone. I personally am more available to travel and visit places, so I try to reach out to people not around my local area which gives me more variety with finding people. I also have a very hard situation that I try to talk to people about and I form relationships around that because we can bond over something.

@AKW I just signed up & am in same boat as you. Very few & at least 80 miles away. There are a couple closer but are pro's & I don't have the money for it. I also signed up on a dating site cuz there's more people but they want something else. I guess patience really is a virtue.

Melancholy

I have found cuddle enthusiasts in the past.
But it's now much harder than ever.
Even a female cuddler enthusiast who may have never considered being a pro becomes enticed by the high hourly rates and no required education or barrier to entry.
I can't think of any legit jobs that pay 120 per hour but don't require expensive tuition or a trade school.
I told a friend to try this site to find cuddle buddies and before I knew it she was a pro cuddler. I was surprised but she said she might as well make money while she gets her cuddling needs met.
I've pretty much given up finding a cuddle enthusiast.
I'll see a pro next time I need a cuddle session.

OhioMike

@Melancholy there’s a lot of high school kids making a lot more than that in NIL money these days !!

Heimat

This does very much feel like casting pebbles into the ocean.
The ripples seem to go out forever and I have as of yet to see a return.
The ironic thing is that the hollow sound / rejection you get creates the very tension / frustration that cuddling is supposed to alleviate. A bitter pill, indeed.

It's like job hunting. You send out lots of "applications," get a few turn downs, and most you never hear from. Anyone you contact has a load of messages coming in and may never even look at yours.

@Heimat Good way to put it.

pmvines

I just met up with 2 amazing folks from the site this weekend while road tripping. I hear a lot of complaints about nobody being nearby , but you really do yourself a disservice by not investing in getting to know people outside of where you live. I like to travel when able, and by building connections I am able to meet people who I ordinarily wouldn't if I only were concerned with my immediate area . I have met some folks who I know I'll continue to see any time I'm out their way , and vice versa when they come through my area . It takes time and patience, but to me my favorite part is the slow process of getting to know somebody over time. Then when you do finally meet the connection and comfort level is already there , and it is just like you are seeing an old friend.

Melancholy

That's interesting because I've had at least four cuddle enthusiasts say they won't cuddle with someone who isn't local to them. One said it wasn't efficient. I'm not sure what she meant by efficient in this case.
I think it's because they don't want to see someone they can only cuddle with once in a while. One said it has to be within 5 miles. Which is nothing.
It might be the part of the country you're in. Perhaps California is very different than rural areas.

cudbud64

@pmvines Traveling far isn't an option for me, otherwise I would take a road trip.

I have only been here for a day, but I am expecting it to be difficult. Hopefully, I will gain friendships here, though.

It’s just a case of supply and demand. I’m trying the pro route full well knowing I will most likely never get a single booking. I did it really to prove to other pros I am serious about cuddling so they can feel safe and secure booking me.

Nobodieshero

Honestly your probably not going to find a female enthusiast on this site. Try dating sites and just ask women. I did this once a long time ago and it worked. Although anyone on a dating site will be open too or want more. Cuddlebuddies is a serious gray area in terms of relationships. But it is possible to find one.

The problem is woman, regardless of what they look like have zero issues finding guys. Guys on the other hand don't have a million women asking for them. Basically they are in high demand, guys are not. So your going to have to try alot harder.

I was on here for a long while and had no real luck other than with people who were too far away to meet. I ended up hanging out with a female friend instead.

vikkster6

Hello! Taking a chance on 1st time posting. There are so many possibilities for the delays or waiting periods. Catch 22 on all levels. I would welcome more requests with decent greetings/introductions and being in Northern California. I dont travel very far and I dont host so that may affect
my site visits. I have had some great cuddles and I hope for more. I also want to get to know the new cuddler for a bit beforehand. Safety and comfort is a priority. Happy Valentine's Day!