Enneagram Discussion

snugglemommy

For those of you who know about enneagram an are aware of your type, what your type and how has that affected your relationships (friendships, family matters ect.)

Heres a link to the text if your curious about enneagram. https://personalitypath.com/test/enneagram/en

snugglemommy

For example, I'm a type 4, 5 wing and I can be very jealous for attention at times when I feel insecure because Im seeking external validation. I don't ever show my jealousy outwardly but envy can be a feeling that 4's feel a lot, that and shame. Usually this results in just some internal battles. I tend to keep things in but they can come out in passive aggression if I don't handle them for long enough.

Since I'm aware of my tendency to be this way in unhealthy, I practice sitting with my feelings and reaffirming myself when I feel like I'm not getting enough attention from a partner or friend. I tell myself affirmations like "i belong" "i am worthy and loved" and heart opening yoga really helps me. Self love is a huge focus for me and now that I'm in a healthy place I make it my mission to help others to find their own source of love within!

Bear

I am a 9

I came out as a 2

Motorbaby

I am definitely what it came up with, a 6w7.

Sideon

Atypical 7w8. Epicure/Adventurer.

The Enneagram is a nice personality theory and construct, but even knowing someone's type doesn't dictate for me the "rules of engagement." We as humans are more nuanced and diverse than 9 facets of an idealogical diamond, IMHO.

Kuneho

Oh, I really relate to this! I'm a 9w1, also known as the Peacemaker with a perfectionist streak. Some people might say, "Don't put me in a box with just 9 types," but the enneagram is more like a guide that helps you understand why you act certain ways and how to improve yourself. It's like a map to self-improvement that you can use to get better. I love getting practical advice, so I find the enneagram really useful as a bias toward action.

If you go deeper into it, there are actually 27 types including wings and subtypes. And there are different levels of health, so you can move around depending on what's happening in your life. It's like a GPS with lots of different routes to unhealthy or healthy choices. You're always changing, but the enneagram helps you understand where you are and where you want to be.

Personally, I've found the enneagram to be incredibly helpful, and I may even talk about it a little too much (my friends can attest to that, haha). It's given me insight into why I make certain choices and how I can use my strengths - like being a peacemaker - in various parts of my life. Since I'm not a fan of conflict and prefer harmony, I use this strength to create safe spaces for people and bring together groups that are in conflict.

However, I've also learned to recognize and voice when I'm under stress - I tend to shut down and disconnect from the world, and this comes from a fear of both internal and external conflict. I know I may go "numb" when strong emotions arise, and tell myself to "connect with my anger" to really give a voice to what I want - even if it is voicing where we should go for dinner tonight :P 9's are known to be easy-going, go with the flow peeps, but they also can get lost going with the flow of everyone else's agenda, that they lose touch of what they want.

Knowing the number of the people in my life helps me engage with them too. For my 3 friends, I celebrate them outside of their actions - "I love you for you, not what you do." For my 5 friends, I never take it personally when they need to step back from the world, because they need that personal time to be healthy. I celebrate how in touch and unique my 4 friends are and always make to sure to have a fun time with my 7 friends. I admire the strength and sometimes blunt honesty of my 8 friends and am in awe of the dedication to detail of my 1 friends (but remind them to have fun too at times). I'll probably run to my 6's friend's place if there ever is a zombie apocalypse because I know they will be prepared and in-tune with protecting their loved ones, and I always try to make quality time for the 2s in my life.

If you want to get a quick debrief of the types loosely represented in media and movies, I LOVE this channel: https://www.youtube.com/@TypeCast/videos

CSnMUS87

I'm also a 4 wing 5, but I honestly don't remember all the information about it, however I can sometimes see myself doing the same as @snugglemommy when it comes to sometimes being jealous for attention when feeling insecure and seeking external validation. However it isn't that often.

SunsetSnuggles

I am an 86% match for 1. Yup.

~ Sunset Snuggles

TheFunCartel

I came out as a 2

You are the sh@t!

Is it just me, or are a LOT of these "Questions" structured in two parts, and at odds with themselves in their own confines?

TheFunCartel

I’m a zero. The Smashing Pumpkins were right all along.

cuddlefaery

I used to be really into personality typing systems, even though I've always viewed them more as tools for introspection than static labels. I've become less enamored of them the past several years as I've learned more of the ingrained problems in the systems - like that they largely were built on psychology ideals of eugenics, racism, ableism, and colonialism - not to mention a hefty dose of pseudoscience these days thanks to the internet. Still, it can be interesting to consider different aspects of our personalities and how they compare to others or change over time.

For Enneagram I identified more with the concept of the tritypes, partially because I've never fit neatly into one box and usually have 2-3 equally dominant traits in most systems (have the same problem with MBTI). I've tested as both a 9w1 and 6w7, always sx/sp, and my tritype tends to come up as 749...but I think I'm probably a 649 that mistypes thanks to my ADHD need for novelty and because 6s are most common to mistype anyway by overthinking 😅 so 6w7, 4w3, 9w1 sx/sp/so. The 649 tritype is called The Seeker, while the 749 is The Gentle Spirit. Both are sensitive types drawn to healing professions and prone to anxiety, but for different reasons. Throwing my ADHD in the mix makes it more complicated and is part of what made me go down the rabbit hole of reconsider the whole personality typing thing.

(For those into MBTI - I type equally I/E and xNFP, and since INFPs are extraverted introvert and ENFPs are introverted extraverts, and both have reversed cognitive stacks of each other, this tracks lol)

frankparker9

I think a lot of the developmental trauma I’m working on is not enneagram-type-specific, though sometimes it is hard to see how our type structure affects the lens we see the world through.

I’m a 9w1. I see the different points of view on things, and I want everyone to be heard. I’m idealistic and care a lot about transparency and integrity. I guess I’m very aware of all the “conflicts“ inside myself, and in the world, and I imagine ways they could be talked out and resolved. I’m starting with myself.

KaaGee

79% 8 but I'm not paying for the "full report". "Challenger" they say....sure, why not I drove one up until December!

TheDave90

I've taken something like this before, 6w7 sounds about right

VaniRae31

I love these type of tests, I’ve always requested the people I care about to take them so I could better understand their personalities and love languages.

I’m a type 2 wing 7
As well as an INFJ-T
And my love language to receive is Acts of Service and how I show it is physical touch.

Most people tend to not give both when they say what their love language is but most peoples giving and receiving is different.

Carrie_Anne

I’m a 9

Finnegan2017

I'm a 2. Can confirm.

cuddlefaery

I'm curious if all the 2s and 9s are actually 2s & 9s because cuddling draws more of those types...or because statistically those are the most common mistyped types because of how we socialize people to be, especially women, and 9s are the most common type overall.

Side note: I recently learned 6s are the most likely to type themselves as anything BUT their type because they overthink it and keep retyping themselves, able to see all sides of situations and place themselves in each type. (This aspect is what led me to finally give up and agree with those who had typed me as a 6, even though I'd been sure I was a 9 😂)

VaniRae31

@cuddlefaery could be!

frankparker9

I think it makes sense we’d have a bunch of 2s and 9s here. I don’t know ::shrug::

Could I be a 6 instead of a 9… well, I’m not “easygoing” 100% of the time like 9s are described as. I’m anxious and analytical. However, the person who is my reference point for a type 6 is a woman I got to know for a few days, years ago, over the course of a long walk or two. She had a small circle of friends and was distrusting of others to the point she hadn’t made a new friend in years (and was probably in some process of trying to figure out if she could extend basic trust to me). She talked about being a 6 and how she had come to be so concerned with security and protection. I saw a real contrast between her view of people in general and my faith and optimism.

At the time, I was calling myself a 5w4. Thinking of myself as a 9, years later, when I received some coaching from someone who used the enneagram and was highly familiar with it, was kind of eye-opening. Or maybe I changed, and maybe I’ve changed again. Or maybe we all have aspects of all the types.

frankparker9

I just picked up one of my Enneagram books and flipped through it, and yeah, I’m the intimacy-focused subtype of 9. Looking for a comforting/spiritual experience, and can be that for others. Tendency to want to merge/melt. Need encouragement to develop my individual, personal gifts and talents (even though I have many).

The different subtypes of a type can be very different, with social 9s and self-preservation 9s having different tendencies.