you really learn nothing about each other ... you learn about each other's AIs.
I agree. Utilizing AI for your own personal expression is admitting you are inconsequential and have quit on yourself. At least pouring your own heart and feelings out is going down swinging rather than regurgitating thoughts already expressed via algorithms. If we all relied on code to make a connection we would be cutting the cord to our humanity and really, what would remain of life?
@BoomerSpooner - I’m still not sure how I feel about all of this. In some ways, I view chatgpt in the same way I view calculators. Sure, I could do the math, but why should I when a calculator is instantaneous and always correct? I was invited to a speaking engagement recently, and after writing my speech, I asked chatgpt to do it. The speech that AI wrote, once I posed the request properly, was superior to mine.
@warm_embrace some of the greatest writers speakers musicians dancers etc. what sets them apart from the rest is their emotion. Sure there could be some that are technically inclined when it comes to the arts, but those that are able to project and perform with true emotion are the ones that are great
The speech that AI wrote, once I posed the request properly, was superior to mine.
In what regard? AI has replaced some writing endeavors such as copy editing, basic social media posting and some technical writing but even AI creators have admitted that higher level models of writing like creative writing AI can only simulate what already exists.
I suppose you could concede to AI if your creative well is tapped out and original ideas are elusive for you. I find AI responses to be quite straightforward and lacking in the use of metaphors for example—particularly extended metaphors, satire other than mimicking satire already done, and even nuanced speech patterns.
But I can see it being used by those who feel inadequate with their attempts at written expression or who have a mental block for capturing emotion in written form. I understand that. But lacking that ability or being flawed is what makes us human and if a relationship ensues then it will be revealed that the emperor has no clothes. Flaws are understandable and in many cases very lovable. Insincerity and illusion are rarely endearing.
@lonelytauros - you have higher expectations than I do for a platonic cuddle. I’m mostly looking for authentic platonic connections with people who I might not otherwise have the opportunity to know.
@BoomerSpooner - I was surprised at how on-point and nuanced the AI generated speech was. As a sort of experiment, even though I wanted to edit it a little, I delivered it exactly as written. It was very well received and several people asked for copies.
@warm_embrace and see that’s perfect. You just wrote something and conveyed what you’re looking for without the aid of the AI and it turned out wonderful. Now as far as my expectations for my cuddle sessions, that’s a whole different thread, but generally speaking, I just like probably what you do and most other people on this site I just like a cuddler that’s nurturing and affectionate
@warm_embrace But you are not saying how it was superior to your writing. And what do you consider nuanced? What kind of speech was it? Did it make people laugh?
The calculator analogy is correct when dealing with the black and white, but writing, art and music are not always black and white. New styles and modes are not created by AI at this time.
@BoomerSpooner - It was an opening devotion for a meeting to consider merging two non-profit social service agencies. The group said they felt inspired.
This is the prompt I entered:
“Write a 3 minute prayer about consolidating 2 Social Ministry Organizations in order to better serve clients and communities.”
@warm_embrace Alright, I can see AI doing a bang up job on an opening devotion as those tend to be filled with homilies and general catch phrases. Generally these are given to a group of likeminded people and you are not challenged to inspire a large diverse group from atheists to evangelicals, educated to uneducated or the rich and the poor. Like I said previously, some writing can be easily duplicated and some cannot.
Different audiences require different techniques and many audiences require an element of surprise or the desire to hear something unique.
Seems to me that using AI to communicate your thoughts is a form of plagiarism but I guess it can work short term I agree with @BoomerSpooner that if in a relationship it could end up with a naked emperor.
@Mman - I agree that AI is no substitute for genuine human connection. However, that’s not what we’re talking about here. The topic is how to craft successful “first messages” that get a response. Whether or not a connection happens after that is up to the people involved.
@Mman
It’s an interesting question, and again, I go back to Cyrano.
Does Roxanne love the wonderful prose of Cyrano, or does she love the handsome physicality of Christian?
Edmund Rostand was writing an excellent play about what seems to be a romantic triangle set upon the backdrop of court intrigue and warfare.
But looking deeper he is really writing about love itself, what (if anything) earns it, and if even we humans ourselves can ever know these answers.
Or, to paraphrase a famous literary historian, “If you get the hug, does it matter why you were hugged?”
My point here is to simply suggest to the many men here, frustrated with their efforts and lack of successes, that perhaps spending a few moments of feeding a detail or three into the AI (their profile name, city, and a few of the adjectives they used to describe themselves) along with your own basic parameters (platonic cuddling, being a safe space, affectionate support) can quickly generate a fairly simple, but not overly complicated or needy, opening greeting.
No need to agonize about “what to say”, or even “what will work”, and also no need to feel the stin of rejection.
If you get a response, wonderful, now you can begin.
If you get no response, ok. It wasn’t YOU (and your efforts) being ignored or rejected, it was an AI.
In the numbers game that is relationships via social media, why not work smarter, not harder?
I doubt AI would have written Cyrano de Bergerac prior to Rostand creating it.
And in the play Christian, after using Cyrano’s words all that time is revealed to be an idiot when he tries to use his own words on Roxane, so he returns to reciting words that Cyrano feeds him. In the end she discovers it was Cyrano’s words all along.
So one can argue that the play is a metaphor for the shortcomings of AI if you look at Christian as the person using AI and Cyrano as AI. You cannot hide your flaws forever and that it is best to present you from the start rather than an idealized facade.
@CharlesInWI oh, I would have responded to that AI message lol.
I wonder if it’s so nuanced enough to know not to replicate it’s response to others for copy & pasting.
@BoomerSpooner I think that's a great analogy.
I wouldn't consider using AI, partly because if I "clicked" with someone, I'd know it wasn't me that they clicked with. Part of the joy of cuddling for me comes from the times when I feel like I'm truly seen. When I'm seen and accepted, even with my human flaws, those are the times when I feel the most accepted.
An AI would rob me of that.
@BoomerSpooner, I pasted your profile narrative into chatgpt and asked for a poem about you. Here was the AI response:
“ In a world of chaos, meanness, and deceit, There's a soul named BoomerSpooner, so sweet.
Seeking solace in cuddles, open to learn, Embracing the warmth, with a gentle concern.
A giver and taker, in cuddles he believes, Reciprocal cuddling, the heart it relieves.
Honest and kind, those who know him will say. A true human connection, in his own special way.
Traumas and scars, we all carry within, But he leaves them outside, where they've always been.
No need for healing, for he understands, His own fears and flaws, he peacefully withstands.
In the cuddling space, devoid of his pain, He seeks relaxation, where worries wane.
No answers to offer, no expertise to heal, Just a comforting touch, a genuine deal.
From states to China, his journeys unfold, And Mexico's allure, a story yet untold.
He travels the world, seeking arms to embrace, A connection through cuddles, in any place.
Shoot him a line, if cuddles entice, From near or afar, he'll bring warmth and spice.
A face pic awaits, to know him with care, Or let eyes and his presence, a bond rare.
BoomerSpooner, a cuddler sincere, With open arms, he'll alleviate fear.
In this tumultuous world, he seeks the embrace, To remind us, sometimes, all we need is that space.”
@warm_embrace It glossed over the part that I am an incorrigible asshole. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
@BoomerSpooner 😂😂😂
Maybe sending a chatgpt poem to an enthusiast based on their profile narrative would be a good first message? 🤔
Wow, what a poem. I wonder if Shakespeare would have a chance against chatgpt.
Not going to go to so much trouble and work just to possibly get someone to give me a chance. I've done that many times and either they ghost you or not. Most of the times I actually met someone and cuddled I put in no effort or very little effort. Someone either is seriously wanting to cuddle with someone or not. Lot of time wasters join and just like the attention I guess or like stringing people along. Perhaps it boosts their ego Not sure why. But thankfully i don't really need anyone anymore. I still enjoy seeing new cuddler friends but don't need it like I used to since I met someone. I feel bad for those guys who do. I remember how that felt. It's quite lonely and somewhat depressing.
I’ve had messages as short as “Hello”, all the way to sounding like an advertisement for the greater good of the whole world, but that was truly how the guy spoke. I just reply to them as they come in, ask questions, go from there. There are so many different personalities.
@CuddleDuncan you are lying to flatter yourself. You have not cuddled with any enthusiast women. You have only cuddled with professional cuddlers who you paid thousands of dollars (pounds in your country). Your reviews are all professionals despite your false claim to have cuddled a 'dozen enthusiast women'.
I wish these tips were required reading before messaging on dating sites. Welcome!
I don't mind a basic intro message. I'm more turned off by a blank or minimal profile bio. I like people to introduce themselves, but expect their bio to be filled out with more details (specs, interests, hobbies, location/neighborhood, clear photo, etc).
@Hoodstar if you had actually taken the trouble to read my Karma, and see who wrote it, you would know that your allegation is untrue.
I suspect you have only looked at the top few Karma, noted that the accounts of those top few that are still active are professionals, and then made a number of false assumptions. One of those is that a person who is a professional now was a professional at the time we cuddled; and another is that all the deactivated and deleted accounts are professionals.
As for your suggestion that I have paid hundreds of pounds to professionals, it is not consistent with your previous allegation. If all these sessions had been with professionals the amount would be thousands, not hundreds. However it is indeed true that I have cuddled with many professionals, as I have made abundantly clear on numerous occasions.
@CuddleDuncan not allegations, just facts. You falsely claim to have cuddled a 'dozen different' enthusiast women but your reviews are all professionals. You paid SO much money, thousands of dollars, to cuddle with so many different professional cuddlers. Why would you do that if you were already cuddling a dozen different women for free? You are lying to flatter yourself.
I feel the same way when I look at a profile that has nothing in it.
@CharlesInWI ~ Sorry for the delay, I didn't know you'd tagged me back on this one.
I think it's cringy because of how it gives the sense that the AI 'writer' is an authentic being who actually understands the feelings, concerns, etc of the cuddler.
It could set one up to let their guard down and allow themselves to be vulnerable with what is essentially a lie. And could very well be how those with a predation sort of nature (but who lack the socialization/communication skills to be 'successful' on their own) are now able to easily charm a mark.
To simplify, I don't like not being able to trust that the people I'm bonding with are who they present themselves as, or having to worry that they may have nefarious ulterior motives. I do anyway, but knowing about this AI business now makes me feel I need to be quite a bit more trepidatious about those I haven't actually met in person yet.