Tips for being a good host?

vector

I have booked a session with a professional cuddler where I will be hosting, and being new to this I'd like to receive the community's wisdom on how I can be a good host. I've read the basics and will be sure to observe requirements of timeliness, hygiene, understanding and respecting boundaries, etc., but I'd like to do better than the bare minimum.

I have booked a hotel room, so I don't expect to be doing much to prepare the venue. I thought about bringing beverages and something light to eat, but I don't know the cuddler's dietary restrictions and, I mean, if the roles were reversed I sure as hell wouldn't accept food or drink from a new client.

TIA

Take a deep breath and relax. You are way overthinking this. Just don’t be a jerk and everything will be fine

sunnysideup

Pretty much that. Maybe have a few clearly unopened water bottles around. Ask if they have snack preference.

Relax, and just be respectful and polite and that’s all there is to it!

You're very thoughtful for wanting to provide the best experience! They're coming for you - not the amenities. Just be kind & communicate. Happy cuddles ❤️✨

vector

Ok. It is fair to suppose that I am anxious, but it would be a mistaken supposition. I just put a premium on being respectful and well-mannered. Thanks for putting my mind further at ease.

AllAboutSoul

You're very considerate! As the paid cuddler, I bring my iPad for music and soft lighting (battery-powered tea lights.) Usually, I also have unopened bottled water and prepackaged snacks. (A microwave incident swore me off utilizing those ever again!) Definitely ask about dietary restrictions or preferences, if you do more.

Mr_Cuddle_Bear

I would not offer unpackaged food or beverages to someone unless I knew them very well.

bekah_cuddles

As others have said, that's very thoughtful! In addition to offering unopened beverages and snacks, asking about temperature and music preferences is usually much appreciated. Having a candle or diffuser around can be nice to set the mood too, but make sure they don't have any allergies or aversions to certain scents.

Sage your house. Sage the cuddler. Offer them sardines and raw onions. Turn on a playlist made exclusively of Wesley Willis songs. Present them with an MS Paint depiction of your feelings.

But really. Keep it simple. Let yourself and your environment be clean. Be polite. Express gratitude.

CuddleWho

Feel free to offer water or whatever else you have. Have a clean environment. Be a decent person.

Going to any further effort is likely not worth the trouble.

Motorbaby

A couple of unopened bottles of water is a great idea as you may end up wanting one yourself!!!

AllAboutSoul

@GrayKunz 🤣😂 Literally LOL'd. Tx!

beaubliss

I often host cuddlers in a hotel room......and, as you can read in some of my karma, how I prepare the environment has been greatly appreciated. When you host, YOU get to be the one to set the mood, have the playlist going that YOU enjoy, create the appropriate lighting and temperature. I am often disappointed as a guest, as most pro cuddlers do not set the environment as consciously as I enjoy. And, as a few of the comments made previously suggest, many of the men don't seem to think it's as important as I do....so take the following with a grain of salt

1) I set the temperature to quite cool, as I enjoy cuddling under the covers
2) I have candles lit, and the curtains drawn, as I prefer soft lighting for cuddling
3) I always have unopened small bottles of water to offer
4) I burn incense prior, as I really like the smell....it puts me in a meditative space.
5) I have music begun playing prior to inviting the cuddler in, and the music I choose and enjoy is singer/songwriter genre, with sweet soft sounds that again, create the mood I prefer.
6) I always have windows open for fresh air.
7) I am freshly showered, teeth-brushed/mouthwashed, and free of chemical smells. Many cuddlers and clients do not like colognes and perfumes, so unless requested, I would steer clear. I do enjoy essential oils, and lightly anoint myself for the meditative aroma.
8) Turn off phones and devices that will distract.....you want to both show and be shown the respect due for all a cuddling session can offer.
9) Breathe, go inward, find calm.....just before welcoming your pro. All your preparation will be at least inwardly received and appreciation for that may determine both the quality of the upcoming session as well as whether you schedule another session.

Or you can simply do what others have said and just be polite!

LaughLoveListen

I think you are wonderful and any cuddler would be so thankful for the extra thought and energy that you’ve put into making your session a magical experience. You have some great suggestions here, so find things that speak to you. Enjoy and you sound like an amazing soul!

vector

@LaughLoveListen Thank you for the kind words! I hope I can live up to them.

Blue_eyed_Queen

@vector I can assure you that just by reading your post, any Pro would enjoy their time with you! Simply being concerned for the other's wellbeing is greatly appreciated and is not hard to demonstrate.

Practice good hygiene and keep communication open (any good Pro will appreciate a conversation prior to a session, and you can feel free to ask questions about dietary restrictions and etc at that time!)

Best of luck to you!

A small suggestion: Have unopened “travel size” toothpaste, deodorant, and a sealed toothbrush handy on the washroom counter for your guest.

AllAboutSoul

@CharlesInWI hopefully they go in there... 😆

@CharlesInWI That's a lil much. You should have a reasonable expectation that they come clean.

If I were a cuddler coming to your house, I probably wouldn't think those items were specifically for me unless you (the host) informed me. At that point, I may take it as an insult.

Just my perspective.

Bear

I will always ask if they want a particular beverage or what they need if I’m hosting. I’ve also found out if they have any restrictions. One person had issues with types of soap and deodorant. So I bought the same kinds of body wash, hand soap and deodorant that they use so it’s not time cause any kind of issue with sent or touch.

Plus I just ask. Is there anything that they need?

With one person coming from another state and mentioning that she tells friends where she’ll be by also offered to send a copy of my drivers license, showing my face and address. Nothing else, not saying that you have to go that far.

@GrayKunz You sound like one heck of a good time 😂 Great post

lewis9887

Initially I've only offered unopened beverages (water in the evening or vanilla frappuccino in the mornings) after I got to know a cuddler I've also offered dinner (if it's late, I provide Tupperware for a to go meal) nothing too fancy.
Set the mood. Depending on time of day, drawn curtains, candles, sort of low light. Freshly laundered bedding and pillows, and be freshly washed (head to toe). I prefer to be out of the shower between 15 and 30 minutes beforehand ( so no time to get icky).
Ask their preferences, get input. Be a gentleman.

cuddlefaery

@Bear as a hypersensitive skinned individual, can I just say... 🥰🥰🥰 For occasional cuddles, that level of allergen awareness thankfully isn't necessary for me - I only have to go that far with live-in partners or people I'm in close contact with daily. But because I am sensitive, I too always ask about scent and soap sensitivities just in case, so kudos to you for being so aware and considerate 💖

Bear

@cuddlefaery
Thank you for the compliment. It’s just part of who I am I guess. I don’t give a second thought about it. Same in regards to caregiving for my dad. So many people tell me. I’m wonderful for that too. I’m like it’s my father who wouldn’t take care of their parents. Whenever I cuddle or take care of someone or do energy healing work always make sure the other person is comfortable. I check in on them as much as I can.

cuddlefaery

For me hosting (which is rare cuddling these days since my space isn't cuddle conducive currently), I definitely try to cater to my cuddle partner/client's needs.

I have plans for a separate cuddle space that I'll keep my cats out of once I'm able to move into a bigger place, that way people who have allergies would still be able to enjoy. It'll have fold out cushions, lots of comfy things, soft lighting, and it's own air unit to control for comfort.

Being prepared is a big thing for me - having extra blankets for layering, extra toiletries just in case, menstrual products, tissues, hand sanitizer, masks (was doing it before it was cool 😎), a wide variety of scents should we choose to use them, eclectic music/movie/game options, etc. I like being flexible and go with the flow in the moment, and being prepared in advance best allows me to do that.

CuddleHugs01234

@GrayKunz you had me smiling and laughing too. 😂

w8ed_blanket

Echoing a lot of the sentiment above me, @vector: I think you're very thoughtful and sweet in being considerate of the pro. It definitely is very nice when there's offers of beverages and snacks. If you really want to do this, just message the pro if they have any preferences for drinks/snacks. It's awesome you're also emotionally sharp in understanding what the other person may feel if given food/beverages for the first time in a new space by a stranger.

But yes, outside the rules outlined in the Terms of Services here, you should be good! Communicate what you would like in your cuddling session; be respectful and kind. Hope everything goes amazingly well for your first session!

CelestialTouch

I like the color changing lamps so maybe the color of the room can help set the desired mood.
I wouldnt use a flame candle in a hotel, maybe an electric one.
Smile and compliments... a smile can go a long ways and being respectful.
A stranger would likely be more comfortable with unopened/sealed beverages/snacks. Breath mints just in case.

Morpheus

A couple things I do almost immediately that I don’t think have been mentioned is show them where the bathroom is and introduce them to the family pets 🐶🐈

TxTom

When I host a Pro at my place in Austin, it's pretty much standard fare. She usually just drives herself. I provide the basics, as already detailed above (water, snacks, incense/candles, background music or TV, etc.)

However, when I host at my summer house in the Northwest Territories, the journey is just a wee bit more involved, but every one of my Pros have been very accommodating.

First, they book a flight from their city to either San Diego or Toronto. From Toronto, for example, they would then take a brief 5-hour flight to Yellowknife. With a very short layover in Yellowknife, they then take a small "puddle jumper" roughly 100 miles almost directly Noth to Winter Lake near Fort Enterprise.

Upon landing at the lake, the pilot maneuvers to specific coordinates I've given. From there a small locker with a yellow flag on the shore should be visible. My Pro disembarks the plane and makes her way to the locker, opening it with the combo I've provided her.
She puts on a pair of snowshoes, and a small backpack containing some minimal provisions.

From there she hikes about a mile or so Northeast to Lastfire Lake. Along the southern shore she will need to locate a canoe that I have marked with another yellow flag. This canoe is provided so she can make the roughly 2-mile journey to the Northern side of the lake without having to hike all that way. This canoe is a recent idea I had, and they have all loved using it!

She guides her canoe until she reaches the Northern shore. There, she will need to try to locate another small locker. In it she will find some more snacks and bottled water, as she's very likely already consumed everything in her backpack. Next to the locker I have some cross country skis. She can either take those for the final, roughly 4-mile trek, or continue with the snowshoes. My Pros always have appreciated this option I've given them.

By following the trail of yellow ribbons markers attached to trees, she'll finally make her way to my place--a small, cozy, Thomas Kinkade-esque, single-room log cabin. About 1,000 feet from the cabin she'll see a small silver bell hanging from a tree branch. As a courtesy, I've asked her to ring the bell so that I have a moment to prepare myself to come out and greet her on my porch. It also scares away any bears that may be lurking about.

If she's been there before we'll generally get straight to cuddling in front of the glowing fireplace. If not, I'll engage in a 5 - 10 minute conversation with her so that we can become familiar with each other. The first-timers have always thanked me for not rushing them straight into cuddling. They say talking first helps them get comfortable and feel safe.

For their troubles, I generally schedule at least a 2 or 3-hour cuddle session at my cabin.

Afterwards, I'll offer them some snacks, another bottle of water, and some bandages for their feet before kindly walking them out to the porch. I always feel so rested after a good cuddle! I thank them, wish them safe travels, and hope to see her again soon.

RadiantHugs

@TxTom wanna host a meet and greet at your NWT cabin? I’m down to attend. Yeah, might get mauled by a grizzly on the way, but heck, next to a random mad shooting happening, that risk isn’t all that greater it seems.