Clients: what are some red flags when hiring a professional cuddler?

For those of you who have had negative experience is with professional cuddlers what were some red flags that you missed or ignored? Full disclaimer: this is for research for a video I wanted to make, but I am not going to be sharing any identifiers just general red flags to look out for.

Comments

  • Well, I'll take a swing at this: no photos, or very grainy photos, or photos of sunsets, rainbows, etc. and not of the actual person. This might make me sound shallow, but I'd like to have some idea of what the other person looks like.

    While I realize this isn't a dating app, I think some of the same guidelines can apply: use relatively current photos, don't have other people in the pictures with you, and don't use photos where your physical appearance is drastically different. It's an unpleasant surprise to arrive at a cuddling session and find the person looks nothing like their photo(s).

    Again, I'd like to be so enlightened that I could say physical appearance doesn't matter. But honestly, it does; and, perhaps more importantly, I don't like feeling deceived.

  • edited August 2023

    @WiserGuy3000 professionals are required to have a photo of their face in their profile. If you find a professional that does not, Report it.


    I've only had one bad experience with a professional, and it was a long time ago. The person has long since left the site and so I can't look at their profile. However, the conversation we had (all on the site!!) has survived and there was nothing particularly untoward about that.

    Nonetheless, I knew she was trouble from the very beginning and I wasn't the least surprised when something went wrong. Sadly I can't remember how I knew. I'm not sure it was anything specific, more of a general feeling.

    The only two things I can remember is that she had a totally unneccesary travel fee, and was so heavily made up in her photos that I wasn't at all sure at first that it was her. (It was.) Or to put it another way, excessive focus on money and lack of genuineness.

    Oh, and she didn't set an alarm. Later I discovered that some professionals don't, they use another method for keeping track of time. But she was doing it for nefarious reasons.

  • @CuddleDuncan - The client shouldn't be responsible for keeping track of time. If they go over because the pro didn't set the alarm, the client should still only have to pay what he agreed to during the booking... now if he states that he wants to extend the session, then that's obviously different.

  • @CuddleDuncan and @Mike403 I agree that it is on the professional to keep track of time but its also not a red flag someone can look out for prior to hiring a cuddle therapist.

    1. Someone who wants an upfront deposit and/or pressures you to book before they will discuss anything. Never had a good session with anyone that did that. Booking and deposits can be viable but for everyone’s benefit discussions about likes, dislikes and expectations should be discussed before money and/or a booking.

    2. Someone who changes the time or the ETA of their arrival more than once. Inevitably this leads to flaking.

    3. They request you have extra money for “special considerations”

    4. They give you a phone number before a booking

    5. They let you know the SW websites they are on

  • edited September 2023

    @xandriarain I have had no bad experiences, but I can tell you red flags that I ignore:

    1. Has no karma but asks for deposits (I'm happy to pay for deposits if they have multiple good karma, and none of their bad karma is related to no showing and keeping the deposit. I also understand some professionals no show because the client made them feel unsafe, but they should respond in their negative karma that this was the case, so in that situation the negative karma is not a bad thing but rather a green flag because it shows they have healthy boundaries).

    2. Almost immediately sends a phone number

    3. Erratic communication

    4. Erratic scheduling or not being able to clearly declare what their availability is

    I have had a few people cancel on me same day, but those aren't really bad experiences and I didn't lose any money. But the ones that canceled last minute had a more 'unprofessional' vibe in their profile - blurry and dark photos with very little written on their profile. I wouldn't say that having a short profile is necessarily a bad thing, but it does imply to me that they are new to this site, or they cuddling is purely a side gig and not a scheduling priority for them. Not necessarily a bad thing either, everyone is on here for different reasons and I understand that.

  • Some red flags would include asking too much personal information in the beginning before even getting to try and know me.

    The deposits are a huge red flag, and also as @BoomerSpooner stated the ones that try to just get you to book right away

    Other miscellaneous red flags would include any sort of additional fees, in addition to the cuddling rate

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