Worried about a cuddler's wellbeing

jcooljcool
in Professional Cuddling

Hi all,
I've been seeing a professional for the last few months. In early December we scheduled a session for yesterday morning. However yesterday she did not show up at the scheduled time, and wouldn't answer my texts & calls. She's always been super communicative and punctual, so it seems very out of character for her to just disappear... I'm starting to worry that she's been hurt or in trouble. She's also been offline for 4 days now. Hasn't answered her phone in 3 days. I don't know this person's full name so that makes it almost impossible to find any info...

This is probably a long shot, but is there anything I can do to check on this cuddler's wellbeing?? I don't want to seem dramatic or creepy but I'm honestly pretty concerned at this point. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Comments

  • lonelytauroslonelytauros

    My advice would be to just let it go. It’s not your concern. Pros provide a service clients make the mistake of getting attached.

  • WiserGuy3000WiserGuy3000

    Yeah, what @lonelytauros said. I understand why this is concerning, and given the pattern you describe I'd have some of the same worries. But there's nothing you can do about it. Just hope she's okay and maybe she'll come back to the site and let you know what happened -- or maybe she won't.

  • TxTomTxTom

    While I also understand your concern, ditto what @lonelytauros said. If your relationship with her is strictly client/provider, she likely has family and friends whom are much more familiar with her well-being and her whereabouts.

    Do not get too attached.

  • jcooljcool

    @TxTom I guess I'm just mainly worried she's dead, which is the worst case scenario... That's a scary thought. It's hard for me not to worry. Maybe that's me getting "too attached" but it really scares me to know that I'm probably not gonna get any closure...

  • TxTomTxTom

    @jcool As a client, you're not entitled to any insight into her personal life. And as your provider, she's not obligated to share anything personal with you.

    I do understand why your concerned. I went through that, myself. But you have to learn to build an emotional barrier to keep the personal and profession separate. It's tough, I know.

  • jplemmonjplemmon

    It could possibly just be ghosting. I recently had a close cuddler that just cut me off for like 2 years and we recently reconnected. Basically she had a bf that made her stop cuddling and she instantly left cc and blocked all her contacts. It would have been nice to have gotten a goodbye note at least but some people struggle with it. I’m just speculating but I wouldn’t necessarily assume the worst.

  • Mike403Mike403

    @TxTom - It's not right to just not show up without messaging first to cancel. That's not professional behavior.

  • TxTomTxTom

    @Mike403 Being a "professional" (income) and being a "professional" (behavior) are not synonymous. Although it's quite nice when they're in sync.

  • Mike403Mike403

    @TxTom - It feels logical to be concerned of someone in this instance especially if they never done that before. It takes a minute to text somebody to cancel if something came up and they aren't hurt.

  • TxTomTxTom

    @Mike403 I agree.

  • carrieannecarrieanne

    It’s a sudden change in behavior, and that’s the alarming part. I would be worried also in that case.
    If the person had always been a little flaky, then I don’t think OP would be so concerned.
    But like you all are saying what else can OP do? It’s a difficult situation with no good answer.

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan
    edited January 5

    1. Do worry. It's more than possible that something bad has happened.

    2. Don't worry. The bad thing is just normal life. If it wasn't normal life, and was really serious, given that you had an appointment with her your phone would be lighting up like a christmas tree by now.

    3. She is not your responsibility. It is concerning when somebody you know goes radio silent, but the responsibility for doing something it - if indeed there is anything to be done - is not yours. Some of your anxiety about her is simply uncertainty. You don't sound 'too attached' to me, you sound as if you have a genuine concern about somebody you know. If somebody reliable doesn't show to an appointment, and you're not worried about them ... well, you should be.

    4. Everybody who comes to Cuddle Comfort needs something, that's why we are all here. This applies just as much to professionals as it does to clients. As a group, professionals are not intrinsically less troubled than clients and therefore sometimes they fall short of the professional standards we all hope for.

    5. The thing you can do is to be supportive when she does come back.

    6. If you are desperate to do something now, study her Karma. Study who wrote it, and read the Karma others have written about them. Create links. What you're looking for is a professional who might be a friend or acquaintance, or a fellow-client who may know your professional as well as you do or better. If you find one - and there certainly won't be more than one - send them a friendly, polite, brief, unworrying message and await results, if any. It's unlikely to achieve anything but will satisfy your need to do something. Whatever you do, do not send messages out willy-nilly: that will simply create additional problems for her.

    7. Find yourself another experienced professional if you can and arrange a session as soon as possible. You need a cuddle more than ever now. Things like this are not rare on CC: never rely on one cuddler. This thread may help:

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