How To Choose Your Professional Cuddler

This is written for a new or inexperienced man client engaging a woman professional, so make your own adjustments. I've written it all before, and I don't want to have to write it again. Please make your suggestions in the thread and I'll edit this post.

I have cuddled with perhaps twenty professionals over three years, usually at least several times each and mostly on Cuddle Comfort. Some have fired me so we can be friends. I take a keen interest in professional cuddling matters and a fair number of professionals - both those I have cuddled and those I have not - have come to me for advice.

So, you're thinking about hiring a professional cuddler? Excellent! First, read @respectful's sound advice at the start of the Frequently Asked Questions thread. It answers all the questions you didn't know you had, including the infamous 'boner question'. Link in the post below.

Consider planning a sequence of two or three sessions rather than just one. This avoids putting all the tension and pressure into the first session.

Next, recognise (and behave accordingly!) that CC and the cuddle world tend to reward:

Effort
Respect
Patience
Self-awareness
Thoughtfulness

Remember that professional cuddlers are human beings, and cuddling is a very intimate service: you're not buying spark plugs here, or even getting a massage.

This is a social networking site so we'd like to know something about you. Write something - anything - in your profile, it doesn't really matter what. If you'd like to post a photo or five, hooray. If you'd rather not, well, that's hooray too: it's your call. However, if you don't, please do post a picture of something that you like or is meaningful to you. Some professionals study profiles carefully before accepting a client, although others don't read them at all.

Cuddle sessions are usually arranged between two days and two weeks ahead. (Most professionals work part time and few will accept same day bookings.) Think about where and when you want the session to be, and check that the professional's Facts section covers it.

The ideal length of a first cuddling session is 1.5 - 2 hours. Few professionals will consider an overnight or long session with a client they have not previously met.

Some professionals ask for ID. A driving licence with the address and number blanked off is ideal. There are risks to both parties when meeting people from the internet, but when a man is meeting a woman the balance of risk is carried by the woman. In other words, she's taking more of a risk than you are, so be mindful of that.

Payment is always made in full beforehand or at the start of the session, Some professionals require a deposit but be careful: scammers have been known to set up fake accounts, collect a bundle of deposits and then disappear.

Every cuddle session is individual to the people involved. The only common factor is that there is absolutely no erotic or sexual activity of any kind. (If you are reading this you have already agreed to that.) Crying and laughing are both very common. Note that it is not the case that a cuddle session neccessarily involves touch. If you are nervous about touch - and a surprising number of clients are - then it's fine to have a no-touching session. A good professional will be helpful and understanding about this.

Before making contact, read the professional's profile thoughtfully: it may contain many clues. Clearly there is no certain way of telling what somebody is really like from the internet, but there are positive factors that you can look for. The profiles of great professionals tend to have [a]

Lots of non-generic Karma over time
Well-written text of several paragraphs
Well-curated photo set
Evidence that the professional has completed a cuddling training course
Background in a caring profession
Friends who aren't just clients
Age of mid-twenties or older
Join date at least several months ago
Pattern of logging in at least every few days
Good responses to your messages
Good forum posts

Obviously there are numerous exceptions to all of these, it's the overall pattern that gives you a statistical edge.

Karma should not be relied upon on its own. Always click through to see what you think of the writer, and see what your subject wrote about them. Be cautious of Karma written by professionals when they were new: such people sometimes write false good Karma because they are scared of revenge Karma spoiling their business. In truth, revenge Karma gets deleted by the mods. Always Report false or misleading Karma.

Beware of being swayed by the allure of a pretty smile. Remember, it's probably the best ever photograph taken of that person, in a world where everybody has a camera with them all the time. If you choose your cuddler on looks you risk being severely disappointed. And looks convey nothing about whether the professional is the right person to give you what you need.

As far as I can tell, in no particular order the key drivers of professional selection by clients are: log-in frequency; cost; location; host/guest; unconscious response to photos; looks; age; karma; quality of sales copy; and specific technical factors (smoking, 420-friendly, etc). For best results, think carefully about which of these are the ones that you care about. Why are you thinking about booking this person rather than that one? What do you hope to get out of your cuddle session? Do the answers to these two questions match up?

One interesting point is that there is no known correlation between the rate charged by a professional cuddler and the quality of their service. If there is a correlation, it is small and slightly negative. That is to say, higher priced professionals may tend to be not quite as good as lower priced ones.

When you are ready, click on the 'Request to Book' button and send a message (see below). Agree the details first, and only then make the Booking through the site. Correspondance MUST stay on Cuddle Comfort until the formal Booking is made. This step is essential because it provides the site with its only source of income. And it helps considerably with your safety.

The ideal opening message [is]

Written in good English
Crystal clear about what you want
Polite and respectful
About four to six sentences in length
Has a photo attached if your profile does not have public photos
Individual to the recipient
Refers to their profile if possible

In the post below there is a link to a short thread about this.

Unfortunately, the overall reply rate by professionals to opening messages from prospective clients is 50% at most. (There are complex reasons for this.) If you have chosen a professional who has logged in during the last week or so and has a good profile, and you have a photograph and a good message, then your chances of a timely reply are better than 80%.

Afterwards, if the session went well, politely ask the professional whether they would like you to write some lovely Karma for them. It is their right to say no without explaining. (Some people prefer not to use Karma.) If they are willing, then do it the next day when the cuddle high has worn off but your memory is still fresh. Whatever you write must be polite and true, and must be fair to other clients who may rely on your Karma. Karma may not be traded (I'll write something nice for you if you write something nice for me): that will get you banned.

If things did not go well, consider whether you should discuss the matter with the professional, write bad Karma or Report the incident to the site moderators. Whatever you do must be polite, true and fair.

See the next post for some useful links. Once you've read through those you are ready to choose your first professional cuddler. Good luck, and happy cuddling!

Comments

  • edited October 2022

    Here are some useful links to forum posts/threads. Some of these were referred to above, and the rest are self-explanatory.

    The last two are technically about how to meet enthusiasts rather than professionals, but are still generally relevant:

    If you have any constructive suggestions for this post or the previous one please post them in the thread (or message me) and I will edit the post.

  • This is great and by all means people who find this resonates with them should take it to heart.

    However, there is an alternative method I use: Just find a pro who seems fun and/or seems interesting and/or just catches my eye (and who doesn't charge a completely ridiculous price), and message her to ask about a session. It's kind of the wild west out there, so it's very possible she's a total flake, or even a criminal, or whatever. But there are also a lot of cool people who don't have the most polished presentation, and to me it's worth putting up with some headaches to meet them.

  • edited October 2022

    @CuddleWho thank you, I was hoping you would happen along.

    I think that is excellent advice for a more experienced client like you or me, and is an approach I have taken myself.

    I've tweaked the first sentence of the first post to clarify who it's written for.

  • I do think that you can tell a LOT about someone by their comments in the forum, the most reliable avenue for telling someone's true energy, but most people don't participate unfortunately...

  • [Deleted User]SnugglesRus (deleted user)

    @CuddleWho, I love your perspective! Fun people aren’t always a polished package 🤗😆

  • edited April 2023

    Another great suggestion on how to find the right professional for you was given in this thread:

    I search for male clients in my area and I look at the karma that pros have left for them. I know I know, karma can be fake etc etc I look for pros have have left sweet well thought out karma that’s more than a line or two long. I like when I see pro that have left sweet karma especially the ones who express how much them enjoyed the session themselves. This is of course not a perfect system but it’s worked well for me. (@Morpheus)

  • This may be a stupid question but what if you see a pro you want to set up a session with and you look at their karma,would it be a good idea to message those who wrote the good karma about the pro cuddler? Ask questions about how the cuddler was,were they professional about everything,did they make you feel comfortable,etc?

  • @jonnyquest it's a perfectly sensible question. Yes it is fine to message other members in those circumstances. (This is a social media website, the idea being to facilitate communication between members.) Remember that you are not entitled to a reply or to any particular type of reply.

    If you receive such a request, it's fine to elaborate a little on the Karma you wrote. Remember to preserve the professional's confidence and privacy, and that everything you say should be true, fair and polite.

    It is the case that some professionals are very well suited to one type of client, but not at all well suited to another. This is not a criticism, just a reflection of the complexity of humanity. This kind of correspondance can be very helpful in establishing whether a partictular professional is the right one for you.

    In general when two people have a conversation about a third party without the knowledge of the third party, then that party should be informed afterwards. In other words the right thing to do is to tell the professional that you have had this conversation. (Secrets do not usually make strong relationships, cuddling or otherwise.) However, there are many circumstances where this may not be appropriate, or somebody may not wish it to be known for some reason.

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