Everyone……. Be aware

Hollydollhugs

I forget you have to go into great detail here or it can be misunderstood. I was just at Walmart yesterday. I noticed someone on the isle I was on, didn’t think much about it. I went to another isle, there he was again, I got a buggy that was just empty and went back to the isle with the Pepsi, he came back to that same isle again also, I then went to an isle 5 isles away, again there he was about 20 to 25 feet away standing at a jewelry counter, not looking at jewelry, but at his phone. Every time I looked up he saw me and looked down. Was on his phone talking to someone. I walked right up to him and asked if he was following me, I said it pretty loud, 3 times I asked. He didn’t speak English, so he may not have understood , but I could hear another man’s voice on the other end. He kept talking on his phone. The employees came over and he took off. Please be aware of your surroundings. Walmart managers insisted to walk me out. This is so disturbing.

Minestrone101

💯 I've been listening to a lot of true horror stories on YouTube (Mr Nightmare, Booz and Boos, and Let's Read), and this is common behavior for stalking and abduction.

Good job. 👍 💪 👊

I’ve had this happen to me as well at a Walmart. It was 8am in the morning, I ran in to get some essentials, I’m a flight attendant and was rushing. A tall, Caucasian male followed me everywhere in the store. I was creeped out but wondering if it was only my anxiety kicking in. He was there with a female. After I spoke to a person that worked there. He left me alone. But the girl approached me by my car. She told me I was beautiful and wanted to have coffee with me. I parked in the front of the building and jumped in and left…. FAST!!

Sooson

I've heard of similar experiances this past weekend in my area. A group of 16 year old girls followed simiarly. I wonder if the intention is to post tik to videos or worse.

Hollydollhugs

Oh @Peera !!! That is definitely terrifying. I’m glad you were able to think quick. We have to be so aware no matter where we go.

ReltvlyCanshes

It's good to be cautious and aware. I always fear of over reaction and correction when i hear these things. I don't want to tell anyone how they should feel or react, but also consider when telling these stories the implications.

What i read, no judgement to anyone, is a non English speaking man was thought to have nefarious intentions. But thinking of that, he could very well have been shopping, and he may have noticed during his path a woman that is pleasant to look at, in which case trying to avoid eye contact looked away. i often end up in the same aisles as others throughout my trip. I am cognizant of that quite often and adjust as to not make anyone uncomfortable, looking how i look. But i often may not even notice and pray i never make anyone feel frightened by my presence.

He could be a bad guy, i have no way of knowing, im glad he didn't cause harm and hope he never does. But because of group think he may be treated as a sex trafficker when he was really trying to buy the right feminine products and getting instructions from a frustrated wife or scared little daughter. I don't think any of the YouTube testimonials leave room for that possibility. Especially when certain descriptors are used.

I'm glad the managers did what they could to help you feel safe, i want everyone to feel safe and be safe. If he was a bad guy i hope he felt unsafe and deterred by the reaction.

Again no judgement just offering my thought.

Hollydollhugs

He was standing at the jewelry counter when I saw him looking at me, he wasn’t looking at the jewelry but at his phone. He had a 2 liter coke in his hand only after being in there more than 15 to 20 minutes. I waited and only confronted him when I looked up twice and saw he was looking at me. When I asked him if he was following me I heard another mans voice on the phone. He was not shopping for groceries or he would have been in the food isle, he was on every isle I went on only holding a coke.
I like to give the benefit of the doubt, but our Walmart is less than a mile from the interstate and there are many stories from many people about this Walmart. I’m just going to make sure I have someone with me the next time I go.

SunnyMoon

@BashfulLoner I agree with what you said... 100% , it is not required for everyone to speak English in Walmart.

Minestrone101

The YouTube videos include stalkers passing their houses a few times a week, always being at the store when they go, hearing sounds outside their bedroom windows at night, break-ins, and the ones that were caught: hundreds of pictures of the subject in their phones. All of them started the same way.

My ex even had a married church choir leader follow her from the store and used to park down the street from her a few times a week for hours, and police could not do anything to him bc he did not physically harm her.

I feel women have a sixth sense with certain things including being followed and I think it's one of their best survival tools.

Mike403

I was accused of following somebody when I was simply walking to the light rail station in the downtown area. She just happened to be walking the same direction.

TxTom

I agree with the OP.

While there's no need to become paranoid, always be aware of your surroundings and of those around you, and trust your gut. I think most people are able to sense when something isn't right. There's no shame in seeking assistance if an uncomfortable situation develops.

And sometimes, the person "acting" suspicious may in fact, be seeking help themselves, and is unable to openly ask for it. This happened to me once.

@BashfulLoner

i often end up in the same aisles as others throughout my trip.

Yes, this happens to me all the time at my local grocery store.

SammyG_

Just out of curiosity, what does this have to do with cuddling? Or are these boards fair game for any topic we want to throw out there?

Mike403

@SammyG_ - This is a general discussion forum. I'm sure threads discussion our favorite meme or what our favorite music is doesn't have much to do with cuddling either.

ReltvlyCanshes

@Hollydollhugs i obviously can't speak to your experience, i can only speak to mine generally.

I'm glad you're safe.

I was once taking a youth group of 3 young boys, oldest was 13. The youngest was 10 and walking with me the entire time in a Meijer (similar to Walmart). The 13 went on his own to grab a few items. We were shopping for some things for a project. No issues that i WAS aware of until we checked out. The store was fairly empty but we were approached and i was asked what we were doing. The ten year old was mentioned by someone as following them. Again he was with me the entire time, and he happened to be 5'10 and extremely shy. We weren't following anyone and i didn't notice anyone around in the aisle (that i seen). During this conversation a lady walked up and said the 13 year old was creeping her out in the stationary area. I'm glad those boys didn't hear any of it because they were in their youthful world talking about youthful things. I'm sure that someone in that store left feeling we were up to no good.

All 15 of these kids in this group are straight A students. The 10 year old now 13 and has consistently been the top of his class and that 13 year old is a full time college student after graduating top of his class at 15. All of these outcomes were predictable based on their upbringing, parents and support. Sports is not a focus of our group. And only a few of them participate in sports. I take no credit for their outcomes i just had the pleasure of being present when this horrible encounter took place.

I've had countless others on my own, but i was just sharing because sometimes people make judgments based on perceptions that are out of the perceived control.

Don't let your guard down. That goes for all the innocent people.

Vocalist100

FYI, I frequently end up "following" people when going shopping. Mainly it's because I go down one aisle, the same one they just went down. Then the next aisle, and the next, etc. And there are lots of folks I don't end up following.

If you want to find out if they are really following you, make your path completely random, or double back. I'm not sure of the route you took in the store, but to assume someone is following you simply if they are just moving from aisle to aisle s giving in to a fear that is unwarranted.

CuddleDuncan

I was followed by a man on the street when I was a kid. I must have been about ...13. I kept walking till I reached a good spot, then quickly ran round a couple of corners and got behind him. The whole way I was convinced I was being paranoid, but then I saw him looking for me. That's the only time being followed scared me.

I've also been followed several times while abroad. They were relatively harmless, just pickpockets or muggers. Used basically the same trick on them. One time I managed to end up following the guy around, that really freaked him out. That was fun.

In an even lesser way it happens to me very occasionally on the tube (London Underground trains). More so when I was younger. Those, I assume, just like the cut of my jib and would like to be closer.

Sorry to hear this happened to you @Hollydollhugs. Sounds like you handled it perfectly.

There are a million possible explanations for the gentleman's behaviour, and only some of them are nefarious. But better safe than sorry.

@Mike403 what happened in your case?

Jubal

First, I'm going to +1 what TxTom said. Situational awareness - always - and trust your instincts. I teach firearms carry laws at my office, and such subjects do come up frequently.

Now, not to minimize or detract from the OP's experiences or concerns, but I've often had women engage in this kind of behavior with me at grocery stores. Some will approach me and ask (in one way or another) if I'm available. Even had one pull up to my car while I was loading groceries and ask me pretty directly lol. I never once felt threatened or vulnerable, but then I'm a big guy.

When the roles are reversed, I absolutely agree that a woman could easily feel unsafe. Holly's approach is spot on - speak to the guy in the store and be direct as she was. If the guy's reaction keeps those danger instincts up, then ask store staff for help. If it just turns out to be a shy admirer, then you can deal with that too.

Mike403

@CuddleDuncan - Two ladies were walking in front of me and I was behind him. One of them confronted me because they thought I was following them. It was late at night and I was just trying to catch the light rail train to get home.

lesmis33

what does this have to do with cuddling? - @SammyG_

this is the general forum so people share their life experiences, fun shows to watch, puzzles, etc. People even meetup in groups arranged from this forum. The other two forums are for cuddle specific topics. It is normal for online communities to have general purpose conversation areas so the community can grow and express themselves outside the topic limitations.

To your question specifically, the daily dangers women face is often a blind spot for men. Cuddling is a very close physical(and emotional) interaction and certain safety parameters need to be established by both parties. Some men might(and have been known to) become irate by the safety precautions followed by women on this site. Exposure to the perpetual tribulations of women will hopefully illuminate the blind spots to offer a more affable transaction.

Hollydollhugs

@Vocalist100 I forgot I needed to go into more detail about my experience on here or it can be misread. He was standing at a jewelry counter watching me, not shopping for jewelry, but on his phone, staring at me, it happened to be close to the grocery section I was in. I’ve never had this happen to me before and I would have been able to defend myself, I was concerned if he were to do it to someone else that wasn’t aware of their surroundings.

PixiePassions

This is why it's good to carry self defense. 🙃

This chick has gorgeous essentials kit: https://youtube.com/@Ladyshome99?si=de02SnJMqy0WlNeM

Carrie_Anne

@Hollydollhugs this is really scary to read about and it’s absolutely no accident when you saw him on every aisle you were on, he was clearly not shopping. Kidnapping for sex trafficking - of young girls/women especially- is huge. Boys also are at risk. Happening constantly now. I worry about my daughter, and my grandson who wants to run off at the store. This is very real and no one here should try to minimize this by comparing to their own personal behavior. The good normal men need to be careful of how they might appear. Sadly this is the world we live in now.
This is one story I’ve never been able to forget…
https://www.cbsnews.com/amp/texas/news/parents-speak-out-after-their-15-year-old-girl-disappeared-from-a-mavericks-game-with-sex-traffickers/

TxTom

@carrieanne Agree 100%.

starrynitecuds

Another perspective: when my daughter worked retail, it wasn't uncommon for people to complain about being followed. It was Loss Prevention. The women would often get busted in the parking lot with stolen items shoved in their clothes and purses. Store employees don't always know about corporate Loss Prevention, who are usually there to watch the store employees and how they react to situations (and watch for employee theft.)

Haaaveyoumetsam

Man, it’s just getting scary out there.
I had an incident where I was going on my daily morning walk and some man was at a corner of a street I have to pass and he stops me and says “hey, I saw you walking and I had to turn around! Can I get your number?”
I saw him waiting as soon as turned onto the street and it took about three or four minutes before I had to pass him. And he was so much older! I don’t know if he even saw me that day or just knew my walking path.
Needless to say, I’m just walking indoors right now. I’d rather not risk anything.

Men, if you read this and think “it’s not a big deal, it’s just a man trying to approach a woman, how else is he going to meet people?”(this is what my dad told me after I freaked out and called him by the way 🤮)
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU SHOULD DO!
It is so creepy to see a woman walking by herself and turn around and park your car and wait for her to pass just to ask for her number!
Even if your intentions are good, we won’t feel comfortable enough to give you our personal information. Especially if you are old enough to be our dad.

Mike403

@sc1994 - Good call. You don't want this guy calling you:

Hollydollhugs

A few weeks ago a gentleman I don’t know spoke to me in the bread isle talking about eating healthy, then they shared their mother wasn’t doing well, just small talk, I engaged in the conversation and felt zero threat. I usually always try to be nice to people, smile and I’m on my way, but like many say, we develop a sixth sense when you know things just aren’t right.

TxTom

@sc1994

...turn around and park your car and wait for her to pass just to ask for her number!

Even if he didn't have bad intentions---now there's a guy with absolutely no situational awareness.

Haaaveyoumetsam

@Mike403
Please tell me these are fake voicemails!
I’ve met people on this very site that remind me of this guy 😭

AmazingEmbrace

@Mike403 and @Hollydollhugs. I have empathy for both of you with your encounters. You both easily could have became victims. I recommend ladies, men, everyone to beware of any suspicious activity.

Hollydollhugs

@Mike403 that sound clip, oh man.