@Mike403 Why don't you just ask @DisneyHugs ? Same person...
@pmvines - Let's let the mods investigate since they have access to more information than we do. I'll call out suspected trolls all day, but sexual assault is a serious crime that needs to be dealt with appropriately.
Please take my input with a grain of salt as there's a good chance I'm in the minority on this: The number one characteristic I value even greater than the physical touch is a cuddler's willingness to discuss everything about themselves (the more mundane, the better) without much prompting, as if I have known them forever. I'm not a big talker and enjoy hearing about other people's lives.
@JustP I think small talk about someone’s life is appropriate but I think you need to be prepared to share a bit about yourself as well for it to be sustainable.
@Mike403 I know how the site works no need to explain . Any time a formerly banned member comes back under a new account its suspect . I'm not saying anybody sexually assaulted anybody . I just know it's a formerly banned user who was also just recently registered as a pro cuddler at the time he was banned . No judgment . Just facts .
@BoomerSpooner I completely understand where you're coming from. I guess I should provide crucial piece of context that I only connect with Pros. At some level, I hope the monetary consideration compensates for the conversational inequity. Trust me, I often wish I was wired differently, and I've made significant progress throughout my life in terms of being more open. But cuddling and hearing random stories about/from strangers shoots off happy chemicals in my brain that I choose to indulge
@pmvines - right. I'm not good at memorizing peoples faces and we can't see the profile photos of banned accounts so it's hard to tell is all I'm saying and prefer to just let the mods take care of it.
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@JustP a lot of pros are going to hesitate to share much about their personal life with clients due to needing to maintain professional boundaries and the risks of transference... no matter how friendly they are nor how passionate they are about providing a good experience. Their safety is going to be a top priority and sharing about their everyday life with a stranger, particularly one who does not share in kind, is incredibly risky.
Paying someone does not force intimacy nor require them to take excessive personal risk when you are unwilling to be equally vulnerable. You would most likely be better off becoming friends with a few enthusiasts where professionalism isn't an issue and where you can cuddle regularly enough for trust to be built.
Otherwise, what you are describing sounds rather like abusing a power dynamic created by money and a red flag most savvy pros wouldn't touch with a 10ft pole.
Edit for clarity: having different levels of chattiness and sharing is perfectly fine and normal. Intentionally paying someone so that they share about themselves and so that you do not have to share about yourself in kind is not so fine.
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@Katota - lol. I'm pretty active and I didn't know. I don't have a radar that can detect if somebody is a returning previously banned member and most of the time, we don't know why somebody was banned. (which they should be appealing if they were banned for something that is less severe and not creating a new account)
VPN IPs and dark web type traffic is blocked from reaching this site. I imagine the only way to make another account is to use different devices or possibly get on a public Wifi.
@cuddlefaery I think you're seriously misinterpreting what I'm saying. As I mentioned in my original post, the more mundane the better. I'm not looking for, or care to know anything about them that would jeopardize their safety. No names, no addresses, etc. Simply put, there are plenty of people in the world who love talking about themselves. And I like hearing them. Sounds like a wonderful balance to me. No need to inject fear mongering, there's more than enough of that going on in the world. No one is forcing anyone to share anything; remember this thread is about what makes a cuddle session YOUR (read, MY) favorite. For the sake of avoiding thread derailment, I'll leave it at that.
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@Mike403 Ahh, gotcha. 👍 Well that explains and answers my question. Thanks Mike!😁
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@Pmvines Yeah, Mike explained that to me too. Thanks friend!😁
You know in this clip, I'm "Animal" and you're "Kermit", right?😄😄😄
Hmm I don’t think I could say I have a favorite cause that just doesn’t feel right to compare. Though some members I have become really good friends with so I am sooo looking forward to seeing them when I can (regardless if cuddling is involved or not). This site has been amazing for me to connect with people and make friends.
@jplemmon I would love to see what legal options you think this guy has when he doesn’t have my full real name. How is he gonna serve me papers? He’d have to force CC to give him my personal info, and he would need damn good cause for that.
Dude was previously banned under another account, which is already a huge rule violation. There’s no slander here. And I didn’t share anything private, mods. Didn’t name any names. Just said that he assaulted people, which he did. Glad he’s gone. Just another sicko.
@Mike403 the guy who raped me (unrelated to this site, so mods don’t delete this comment too since I’m not even talking about anything to do with this site…) seemed like a real stand-up guy. He even worked with charities for abused women and was recognized by the city council for his work.
Don’t ever trust how someone acts when people are watching. It doesn’t mean they’re not a monster in private.
Back to the main thread topic
@JustP I get where you’re coming from, and it’s valid to want a good conversation partner, but it’s not really about whether something is mundane or not. The biggest tip to follow when trying to protect yourself is to not discuss yourself honestly at all, even if it’s mundane. Because we all can accidentally give more info about ourselves than we realize. It’s a big reason that women in many lines of work actually make up fake stories about their lives instead, to avoid accidentally sharing anything real that could put them in danger. I’ve heard about baristas that do this all the time since that’s a job where unfortunately lots of dudes try to target and harass the female workers.
It’s not fear mongering, it’s real life, real safety precautions, and situational awareness. Remember also that you’re a stranger online, and no one knows whether you’re safe or not.
Still, good for you when you find a cuddler who suits your needs, just be aware of the other side of the coin
@bobadevotee - I know. I talked with someone on this site a while back(via private messaging) who even hung out with a guy in public for some time before they were alone together and he thought he could try something when he thought she was asleep. It's sickening. You can't trust anyone.
@JustP I think it's fascinating and wonderful that you'd like to listen to people and just hear their every day happenings and mundane stories. I think that's a blessing for whoever is with you. I am an extrovert so I don't have a problem talking. But I find that other peoples lives are much more exciting than mine so I'm always usually interested in what they have to say. But for all those people that never get heard or seen and get to spend time with you in a cuddle, letting them just share their life the good bad and the ugly. What a huge blessing! if you lived in my town and the mods would OK it I would give you a great discount Lol.
I may not have an exciting life, but I have many many many funny stories
@bobadevotee and others, many thanks for offering additional perspective for me to consider. Definitely not my intent to take advantage or manipulate but I acknowledge perception is often just as important as intention in situations like this.
@KozyKim you are too kind. Happy to know there are Pros open to this. If I find myself in your neck of the woods, I will definitely be reaching out to connect 🙂
I have had only three cuddles so far. My favorite kind: great communication, two-way exchange, feels mutual. Pressure. Two hrs is best.
My only complaint is that I am far from the cuddlers.
The great ones I had went from cuddling to having lunch/dinner, real conversations, maybe a cocktail, lots of laughs.. It was more being like friends than anything else. The non great sessions were the ones that feel awkward, no talking, laying around, or those who super treat it like a business which isn’t bad but there’s never really a connection.