Something to Probably Avoid

This is for people who are genuine and respectful of the site's rules. Though just have profiles that may not appeal to the majority.

I've lately been noticing this and this time thought it might help others for me to share it. Especially from the perspective of a woman who is interested in cuddling with men.

You can learn about how to write a good profile description, and send well crafted messages which are all great! Though if your profile description, username, photo, etc., has something that may be likely to give others the ick/be seen as a yellow flag it might help you to avoid that.

If you really don't care about this potentially decreasing your chances then by all means you do you. I'm just saying, first impressions matter and you probably don't want someone's first reaction to say your username to be a yellow or red flag. Or to have a photo about something that looks icky. Because what might also happen is, the person is gonna start thinking about that. By the time, let's say the woman does the calculations she's already on edge. She might decide to let give a chance while being more hesitant than she already was to begin with. Now if in the message there happens to be another ick moment to her, you may already be on strike 2. Get 3 and you might find yourself to be out!

Maybe this point I'm talking about isn't a huge deal in general or to you. Though if it is or you find that it might be and wish to change, I'd consider leaving your fringe hobbies in I don't know... worms or scare crows for people who share it. Not really put it for all to see when you should be putting your best foot forward. Which sure with the right person, your strange interest could be what starts y'all off on a good foot.

Though I think we can agree that most prefer to see you in a different light. Unless you find that unicorn or two who shares your weekend can collecting hobby. Or that meme that's too icky or scary to show to a 5 year old. See, that's kind of the thing too, you're a stranger and that's stranger enough already. Therefore, some of us don't need to see other possibly strange things, especially while we are trying to decipher if you're safe and sane firstly. So some of us may be more likely to either not talk to you altogether. Or talk with you and the more yellow flags be more likely to change our mind. Anyway, I hope that helps whoever it may.

Β«1

Comments

  • Considering how much competition there is for attention from female enthusiasts, in particular, it's best to err on the side of caution. Think of it like applying for a job -- you wouldn't put something in your CV or your cover letter likely to scare a potential employer off.

  • Brevity and courtesy in messaging works for me.

    While hopeful for a response, I keep my expectations low.

    And I try to reflect as much of my personality in my profile as possible.

  • @TxTom Same here. Still doesn't help. I've pretty much given up on the whole thing. Now, I'm only in it for the forums.

  • Wearing a Hawaiian shirt, cargo shorts and sandals could be considered ick for some people. You're wasting your time guys trying to figure them out...lol

  • @WriterGF , and @TxTom Exactly!

    @Vocalist100 sorry to hear that. It's not guaranteed to get anyone results, it's just a matter of what might hurt your chances and whether or not you wish to do something about it.

    @BrionC "Wearing a Hawaiian shirt, cargo shorts and sandals could be considered ick for some people. You're wasting your time guys trying to figure them out...lol"

    All the best to you and don't worry we don't need to be "figured" out by just anyone. Nor is this post about figuring us out.

    It's for those who care to understand what we say and consider if it might be of help to them.

    So like I said, you're FREE to take the advice or not.

  • Most importantly smile or try and smile and look friendly! Very important!

  • edited April 15

    What's so bad about Hawaiian shirts ?
    @OhioMike back me up here my guy !

  • I share sentiments of both sides. To each their own. It's hard, no..., next to impossible and both my opinion and my experience to be able in one paragraph, sell the value of yourself to someone. I'm sure there's a lot of people here for the same reasons I am.. A severe deficit of affection and attention at home. I just want someone to talk to but also listen to and provide some non-sexual affection. I also I'm certain there are many people as well who have ill intentions, which is a shame because it makes it that much harder for those of us don't.( not to mention the fake profiles pretty much every place you go nowadays!) I'm not very confident I'll get anywhere here either. Quite frankly not giving up ,but pretty close. I guess the next thing will be having deal with just having to accept facts. I still have a pretty nice cuddling relationship with my pillow!

  • @pmvines My Guy ! πŸ˜ŠπŸ‘

  • Nice shirt!....lol

  • @pmvines & @OhioMike - I think you two look great in your Hawaiian shirts!!!!

  • Ohioian Shirt?

  • edited April 15

    @Motorbaby awwww thank you !

    @Sooson That shirt (and me lol) made it on national tv once ! πŸ˜‚ unfortunately (or fortunately πŸ˜†) I was turned around giving a high five πŸ™Œ!

  • edited April 15

    Loving all of you guys in your Hawaiian shirts!

  • I think Hawaiian shirts are neat!

  • OMG y'all and your Hawaiian shirts... πŸ˜‚
    Looking good, though. 😊

  • Thank you!!!πŸ˜πŸοΈπŸŽ‰ @HarleyGirlKate and @Lovelight

  • edited April 15

    I love Hawaiian shirts!! πŸ€—πŸ«Ά

  • edited April 15

    The summer of comfortable colors

  • apologies to @Lovelight for the Hawaiian Shirt derailment !! 😲

    @Lovelight thank you for your perspective. Often I look at my profile here and wonder if there are things that need improved. I appreciate any and all feedback that I can get! πŸ‘

  • @Jillybear87 Thank you!!!πŸ€—πŸ«‚πŸοΈβ€οΈπŸŽ‰

  • @OhioMike I don't mind at all and nah, you're good. 😊

    @SuperManCuddles , et al, you're welcome! 😊

  • I am just myself on here (and everywhere) and while I had been really scared to put myself out there like this, I have been met with such a warm reception from everyone that I feel like I am overcoming the social anxiety that I have.

    I don’t have any Hawaiian shirts and will probably never wear one (though I was forced to one year for a family photo). The closest thing I have is a t-shirt from Puka Dog which I intend to wear this year when I visit Kauai so I can get a free hot dog πŸ˜‹

  • I'm guessing that in Hawai'i they're referred to simply as shirts?

  • Or that meme that's too icky or scary to show to a 5 year old. See, that's kind of the thing too, you're a stranger and that's stranger enough already.

    😊

    @Lovelight Well, perhaps I might be a bit "too intense" with my love for horror movies😍 in my profile gallery by including my Netherworld pic:

    πŸ˜„πŸ˜
    I was trying to send a "your looks don't matter, a cuddle buddy is a cuddle buddy" kinda vibe with that pic...Lol!πŸ˜„ Maybe, some aren't seeing it that way.πŸ€” Probably thinking I got all kinds of monsters, zombies and various creatures of the night up in my house...Which I do, they're just nicely contained on DVD!πŸ˜πŸ˜†

    Or with that meme of the kitty cat with the gun, honestly I just wanted to nail my message of NO SEX, ONLY CUDDLING happening here in my profile to those who "doubt" my true intentions of joining CC a year ago.😏
    Been a lot of "Doubtful Dannys" traipsing in my inbox thinking that WHAT I TYPE IN MY PROFILE, ISN'T WHAT I ACTUALLY MEAN🀨.

    Lol! So I added the gun kitty meme at the end for good measure.😜πŸ€ͺ😝

    Seeing as my Gru meme (alone) wasn't making the message clear, ya know?πŸ˜πŸ˜‰

  • And Gru is quite mild and less scary, in my opinion. πŸ˜„πŸ˜

  • edited April 17

    @pmvines and @OhioMike and others with pets


  • Oh man that is so cool @CuddleHugs01234 My little guys have these tiny little teeth that can shred just about anything, including those shirts πŸ˜‚

  • Thing is, it's hard to be both interesting and completely 100% inoffensive. My general experience with women suggests that it's much better to stand out and be a bit interesting than to be boring, even if "interesting" means raising a yellow flag to a few women.

    (Then again, I would suggest that if we find ourselves scrutinizing our presentation to this degree, carefully curating our pictures and a profile, trying to figure out exactly what formula's going to elicit a response... then maybe, maybe the juice isn't worth the squeeze.)

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