Strip clubs. OF. CC.
Why, indeed.
Safety with all people is a risky gamble.
I'm a male and I feel no safer with women than women may feel with men. The complaints that women have with men, I've seen them in women but I may overlook them.
The conversation tends to stay lopsided but generally it's the same. The reality is the recurring message is constantly about men...it's generally the same.
We just call it "creepy" when men do it but "flirting" when women do it. Most of what people have mentioned I see it in women too.
My guess is it's because women are scared of men. They have every reason to be scared.
@debster Thank you , I realize that now. Most don't seem to realize it. Thinking it is free pickings for women.
"So if you're a woman Why would you pay Or not pay for a professional male cuddler."
This will be a bit meandering but will get to the point eventually. When I first joined I had a few public meet ups that showed me it was harder to get a feel for a person online than I thought. Then the filtering through of many messages everyday was overwhelming and I quit the site ditching that profile.
Months later I tried again. This time I read through the forums on creating my profile, vetting potential cuddlers, and strategies for safety. My profile is currently on mute to tune out the noise. I now have 3 regular cuddle buddies and all of them were men who I communicated with for as long as a year before meeting up. It wasn't intentional to communicate for that long but more it took that long for the stars to align and allow a meet up, distance is a factor. There are not a lot of candidates in my area so the majority are active in the Bay Area (CA).
During my search time I also considered a male pro. I felt it would meet my immediate needs, give me experience and perspective, and be less risky. Also looks, age and marital status wouldn't be as much of a factor. (Yes "married" to a touch phobic, asexual, dependent who has many wonderful qualities that will be keeping me married for at least 7 more years. So yes, I need a dam hug.) Guess what? Not a single male pro within 80 miles of me.🤣 I could and still may engage with a pro or attend a cuddle party in the Bay area. Last I looked there were 5 male pros to choose from there. So? For all you aspiring male pros do a search in your area, you may find out you are a unicorn.
As an Enthusiast, I have no interest of paying for cuddles whether it's from a man or a woman cuddle professional.😊
Sometimes, that's just the way it is.
@Minestrone101 👍
I don't know if anyone has brought this up yet but I'll say it anyway - thanks to gender inequality, (statistically) men tend to have more wealth than women. Having more leisure money means you can afford services like cuddling. This doesn't mean no women can afford to hire a pro, it just means statistically there's bound to be more men vs. women willing to spend money on it.
Do women spend more money than men on hair, nails, clothes, perfumes etc. due to the same gender inequality? This has nothing to do with affordability, and anything that does apply to men as well, many of whom cannot afford the hire a pro believe it or not.
@Katota ☝️ 💯
As a pro, I get men in my messages, that after minimum messages, they will give me a phone number, and want all contact through that only. Seems shady and sketchy. Almost like they intent to do something sexual or not pay. I can’t be for sure. However a new client or prospective client, it seems shady if there’s no history. It takes time, even through messages, to determine if you are going to see them.
@caperunner yea im familiar with that. There are pros that try to do the same with clients
When I see someone say that they charge for cuddling because they can get their cuddling in and make money too so why not I just shake my head. Its a totally different dynamic when one person charges for it. Its not longer an even exchange of energies or cuddling. Its just a business transaction from then on. Imagine if every time your friend wanted to go out to lunch and you said sure but only if you pay. That's an uneven dynamic and I feel sorry for the one who always pays. They are kidding themselves if they think that isn't wrong. Don't get me wrong (i'm sure some of you will) a woman is allowed to charge for whatever she wants..but just don't pretend it doesn't change anything. The fact that in all these instances, its only the woman who can charge is not because men are bad. Does money suddenly make men good? lol Its the same guy you're cuddling with.
@Melancholy I hear what you're saying, but I think it depends on the people. I have seen some people on here form really close friendships with pros, to the point where they end up getting free cuddles down the line. I am sure there are other pros who all business, all the time, and have no interest in getting to know the person as a person beyond what they have to for work.
And, obviously, the reason it is women who are charging is that there is little to no demand for male pros (unless they are willing to cuddle other men). If there was a demand, I would bet you there would be 1000 male pros on here, happily charging.
For a lot of people, it comes down to cuddle with a pro or don't cuddle at all, because attracting the attention of a female enthusiast is a rare thing.
How are you determining that male Pros have so few clients ??? Are going by the amount of karma? Just like many female Pros with little or no karma that I've had sessions with, likely their clients choose to not leave karma or were asked not to leave karma.
I don't know ... there don't seem to be any male pros in Santa Cruz, but I could definitely see where if there were and the price was right, there are some times where I could use some Me Time where it is 100% me receiving platonic cuddles.
As much as I enjoy being on the giving side, I like being pampered too, so long as I don't have to drive too far. 🙂
Similar to how it was when I was an LMT. I would pay another therapist so I could lay on her table and receive as a way to revitalize myself to go back to a job I enjoyed. I could see myself doing this with cuddling too.
@SteveInDurham I think it's at least in part anecdotal. There aren't a lot of male pros and the ones who are out there complain about getting no business. The CC business model of charging male pros a fee every month instead of a percentage of their earnings reflects this -- they don't make enough for a percentage deal to work for the site. There most likely are male cuddlers who would be willing to cuddle male pros, but I don't know how many male pros are willing to cuddle other men. Were the male pro business a thriving concern with a big demand, you would see more of a supply here to meet that demand.
Bluntly, ask any female enthusiast how many offers of free cuddling she gets a month. Why pay for it under those circumstances?
Out of curiousity, what do you think would have to change to make male pros as much, or more in demand than female pros are now?
@1_teddybear I would say a) WAY more female enthusiasts to the point where the ones that exist aren't flooded with messages and 2) male pros willing to cuddle with other men. #2 might happen, not sure #1 will for a long time since this is still a niche thing. Just like dating sites (and yes, I know this isn't one) men far outnumber women.
@SteveInDurham I was a male pro and I received no bookings and no interest during that time. @Debster and @Bear - I don't deny that there is some fear of men that is at play, but I don't think that its a major contributing factor at all. And I say that primarily because the business model of this site is women being open to cuddle and men being willing to pay for it.
I think socialization plays a major part of it. As much as I have come to love cuddling, there isn't one guy in my male friend group outside of cuddle comfort who I could ask to cuddle. And I could not ask any of my female friends who have a partner without causing issues between them and their partner or them hiding it from their partner. That is one of the main reasons I joined the site in the first place.
Regarding men often having more wealth than women: Not only that, but many manufacturers charge more for women's clothing than men's (because they learned a long time ago that enough women will pay more for a similar thing). I'd say most women want to look good, if not their best, and it costs money to do that, especially if you are not blessed with good genes. There tends to be more expenses for women, especially if they don't go without makeup, their hair well-styled and they don't wear the less expensive unisex clothing, etc. In my small circle, women are more likely to buy gifts and make food to take places. This also adds up. This is a very general generalization of course, but typical women doing typical things tend to have more expenses and less income that they think of as discretionary.
Women have pink tax, fancy underwear, bras, more doctors visits (feminine health), hair and makeup, beauty and age management costs in life... In my opinion, We have far less money to spend..
Some are realy creative with managing their age here on CC.
@CakeNCuddle female pros get more clients than male pros by a ratio that far exceeds what can be explained by that reason alone. Just doesn't add up. No that's not the reason.
@caperunner posted: "As a pro, I get men in my messages, that after minimum messages, they will give me a phone number, and want all contact through that only."
FYI, you're only allowed to exchange contact info with clients after a booking has been made, through the site.
@Melancholy posted: "Its a totally different dynamic when one person charges for it. don't pretend it doesn't change anything."
Definitely agree. This doesn't mean there aren't Pro's who care, but it still hits different than two people spending time together where no one has anything financial to gain.
@Sooson posted: "Some are realy creative with managing their age here on CC."
🤭 Indeed. Don't believe every number you read, or every filtered picture you see. 😆
~ Sunset Snuggles
🦄 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Fiend 🐘 Animal Lover
Good question
I am only chiming in from my experience. I do browse male pro profiles, however, they are priced too high for me (I want to try to book a couple hours cuz 1 hour tends to just fly by)...so I just continue to browse. I did find one local male pro that I found reasonably priced and have reached out, but he hasn't signed on in one month (Womp Womp), so I'm just waiting to see if he eventually does again.
See the most recent discussion in the sticky post on male pros in the Professional Cuddling forum if you wish to join the conversation.
https://www.cuddlecomfort.com/forum/discussion/10997/male-pros-how-has-it-been-for-you/p1