Why I have a two hour minimum

xandriarain

• please note that my primary reason for writing this is to link it into the FAQ section of my profile and provide a lengthier explanation of my two hour minimum. You can share your thoughts but I am not really looking for a heated debate.

1. I find that two hours is the minimum time needed to get the full benefit of the experience:
   Especially for new clients, it can take a little while to get over first time jitters and you still want enough relaxing cuddle time after getting over that initial nervousness. On top of that my sessions often include lots of conversation. With two hours we have enough time to chat and get to know each other or catch up and still have some relaxing quite time as well. With one hour the conversation and session as a whole often feels rushed and my goal is to create a relaxing experience. I discourage clients from coming in if they have to go to work later or are in a rush that day because I want you to really feel the after effects of the session and not negate them by throwing yourself into a stressful situation right afterwards

2. You need enough time to relax:
   we all know that feeling when you have to go back to work before you feel ready. Our bodies and minds need enough time to relax and reset so you can feel rejuvenated afterwards. Most of my cliente prefer longer sessions for this reason

3. Logistically speaking two hours is the minimum time/ pay needed to be worth the time I put in surrounding the session:
   My office locations are 25 and 40 minutes away so it is 50 to 80 minutes round trip, I have to wash a clean set of sheets, make and strip the bed for each session. Making and stripping the bed take at least an additional 15 minutes. I spend 20-30 minutes on a consultation call with each new client, follow up with existing clients. I also put many hour into marketing and education. I typically only see 1-2 clients per day so I need at least two hours to be financially sustainable.

TxTom

I agree 100%.

This all makes sense to me, too.

sg89

Fair.

Katelyn_B

Seems reasonable enough to me.

beaubliss

You should definitely organize your business the best way that works for you.....

Though you didn't want to begin a heated debate, I think community-wise it is still helpful to voice different perspectives, so we can understand why some feel differently from others. And to echo the others who have commented thus far, everything you say completely makes sense

However, from the perspective of a client who loves cuddling as often as possible, here are two objections I have to two hour minimums, specifically for new meetings:

1) I never know how wonderful the connection will be. I have found that as of lately, I rarely, if ever, meet someone where I don't connect, but I have certainly had those experiences in the past. However, I have found that I can manage to make it through an hour of non-connectedness, whereas 2 hours would be really difficult. We make mistakes. We either vet poorly, make spontaneous plans out of pure hopefulness, or just meet up with someone where their inner space and ours are not in synch. 2 hours can seem sooo long with someone you don't want to be with, both from the client perspective and the pro.

I do understand that you spend time on an intro call, so that's certainly helpful. And I suppose that there can be a "bailout" clause that allows either to end the session after an hour if they're not feeling it. But I like the other way of doing it....which is to extend if the session is going swimmingly. That happens with me about half the time, that is, if the pro has the schedule flexibility.

2) Cost. Yes, I certainly get that you only see a couple of clients a day, and that at $150 an hr., you need to make at least $600 a day to compensate you for your extra time in preparation and travel. However, for those of us who would really like several sessions a week, costs can become prohibitive. If I can budget $300 per week for cuddling, I would definitely prefer to have two separate hour sessions on two different days/nights, than one single session. I understand that there are wealthier clients where session cost is immaterial, but the bulk of the clients that I know and hear about, cost is definitely a factor. But I also understand that people are quite different, and that if you are the preferred cuddle provider for someone, they may want to prioritize a session with you for two hours, twice a month. I get that. I just wanted to articulate a different perspective that is shared by many with whom I speak.

I hope you don't find this contrary viewpoint insulting, or at all divisive, as it's only meant to add to the conversation. I guess I could have started a thread called "Why I don't schedule with cuddlers who have a 2 hr. minimum"......but I really wanted to contribute to this conversation just so we can all understand our differing perspectives.

TheFunCartel

@beaubliss I agree with you. I am in a position where cost really isn’t a factor but I have found 150 and up an hour to be an exercise in throwing good money after bad. In my experience I discovered little difference and quite often entitlement comes with that larger price tag. So I have a $130/hr cut off. Someone else was tracking those that charge 200 or more an hour and those accounts tend to get banned. So stick to your guns on price.

I also agree with wanting one hour sessions. I prefer two but I have also gone with one hour sessions before if something was sketchy about the pro or I wasn’t sure about them in general. Again I would move on to someone else.

TxTom

The OP graciously posted very thoughtful comments specific to her cuddle business. Her comments were simply meant to explain in further detail about her procedures for the benefit of potential new clients.

Yet, that familiar undercurrent of bitterness about prices surfaced once again on her thread. There is never a need to publicly announce dissatisfaction with any one Pro's fees. It's rude and childish. Just quietly go somewhere else.

For instance, I would love to purchase a Lamborghini, but I lack the means to do so. However, I'm not about to go on the Lamborghini discussion page (if there is one) and throw a hissy fit over the price of their vehicles.

The OP is only one of a handful (or two) of Pros whom I've seen, who seems to have really turned cuddling into a genuinely professional business. Looking at her profile, it is obvious that she has put in the extra time, work, and investment to make hers a real business, in every sense of the word.

If I were in her area, I would absolutely schedule a session with her.

Katelyn_B

@TxTom: Looking at her profile, it is obvious that she has put in the extra time, work, and investment to make hers a real business, in every sense of the word.

I agree, she really has. 🙂

HoosCuddling

As a client, I always book at least two hours as well. The prevalent thought in my head re. a shorter (1 hour) session: I'm much more likely to be disappointed at the end of the hour (because I want more!) than relieved.

And indeed, in about two years of hiring professional cuddlers, I've so far only had one session that was uncomfortable where I wanted it to be over sooner. In the rest of the cases, the booked time (2-3 hours in most cases) was either just perfect or not quite enough!

xandriarain

@beaubliss
I know it is six weeks later, but I wanted to address some of your talking points:

1) I never know how wonderful the connection will be. I have found that as of lately, I rarely, if ever, meet someone where I don't connect, but I have certainly had those experiences in the past. However, I have found that I can manage to make it through an hour of non-connectedness, whereas 2 hours would be really difficult. We make mistakes. We either vet poorly, make spontaneous plans out of pure hopefulness, or just meet up with someone where their inner space and ours are not in synch. 2 hours can seem sooo long with someone you don't want to be with, both from the client perspective and the pro.

I do understand that you spend time on an intro call, so that's certainly helpful. And I suppose that there can be a "bailout" clause that allows either to end the session after an hour if they're not feeling it. But I like the other way of doing it....which is to extend if the session is going swimmingly. That happens with me about half the time, that is, if the pro has the schedule flexibility.

As you mentioned, I do a consultation call to determine compatibility beforehand; it is also stated in my code of conduct that either party may end the session at any time. While they will not get a refund, no client is held hostage if they aren't having a good time. Given my five years of experience, conversation skills, and the wide variety of cuddle positions I offer, the time typically flys by for both me and the client. In fact, I can't remember the last time a session felt awkward and slow. Obviously, there are no guarantees in life, but given my karma, experience, and the free video call ahead of time, working with me is a pretty safe bet. In the worst-case scenario, the client doesn't have to come back.

2) Cost. Yes, I certainly get that you only see a couple of clients a day, and that at $150 an hr., you need to make at least $600 a day to compensate you for your extra time in preparation and travel. However, for those of us who would really like several sessions a week, costs can become prohibitive. If I can budget $300 per week for cuddling, I would definitely prefer to have two separate hour sessions on two different days/nights, than one single session. I understand that there are wealthier clients where session cost is immaterial, but the bulk of the clients that I know and hear about, cost is definitely a factor. But I also understand that people are quite different, and that if you are the preferred cuddle provider for someone, they may want to prioritize a session with you for two hours, twice a month. I get that. I just wanted to articulate a different perspective that is shared by many with whom I speak.

This is an interesting perspective; most of my clients prefer longer sessions and agree that two hours is the minimum for them as well. It is rare to see a client more than once a week. If a client wanted to see me for an hour twice a week rather than two hours once a week, that would double my time driving, doing laundry, making the bed etc. So it would still be hard to justify the time investment for a one-hour session even if it were a super regular client. The only way I could justify doing one-hour sessions is if I could have three or four one-hour sessions in the same office in one day, however given that I divide my time between the two offices and house calls pretty evenly this would be a logistical nightmare to coordinate not to mention it is a lot more energy draining to have to change the sheets, freshen up and mentally switch gears for the next client multiple times in one day rather than just seeing one or two clients in a day. I find that two clients is my daily limit regarding physical and emotional energy and that I would most likely short-change a third or fourth client. I realize I have a unique situation compared to other cuddle therapists but I would rather set limits and boundaries so I can give the clients that are compatible the best experience possible rather than spreading myself too thin to try and accommodate everyone's budget and schedule.

beaubliss

I completely understand your preferences....and your reasoning behind your protocols. I'm sure you are doing business that allows you to have balance and good revenue. Please don't think I was suggesting that your two hour minimum was wrong.

I simply wanted to add to the conversation....and to explain why I don't choose two hour minimums, so that others may reflect upon what will work best for them.

penguin34

I found the whole conversation about the "2 hour minimum" very interesting. I also saw that a pro states that she will collect payment at the beggining. After quite a few mishaps along both those lines, I will now be implementing both of those above rules. Live and learn ☺️

ubergigglefritz

I have 1.5 hr minimums. I don't start that clock until we're through with initial questions and initial session agreements. That's a good budget session for people who want sessions more frequently, but virtually all sessions are 2-3 hrs or overnights. One hour is too short for everyone except maybe one person I've seen in the past 6.5 years of cuddling... I essentially always leave time afterwards for extensions. I do not sandwich sessions together one after the other, usually just one per day. I am fortunate to do this at home, so travel is not a concern, and that allows me to wholly focus on that client not worrying about the next. Everyone definitely functions differently. I've just found I'm happier cuddling that way. 💜