@WriterGF and this is the reason for the comment. I was ultimately stating that we can't have varying opinions in here we can't bash pro so let's bash the others.
Because money can be exchanged for goods and services.
Ahhh, just like all the other threads.... 🙄
@FitSmartCuddler The premise of your argument is that if you are a professional, you have to cuddle anyone who requests it, but that premise is false. I know many female pro cuddlers who are selective about with whom they will cuddle. If you assume that you will choose with whom you cuddle exactly the same way that you would as an enthusiast, and that the cuddle arrangement is unchanged also (host vs guest, etc), but also get paid for it, would you?
Anyone who thinks this is not about supply and demand is deluding themselves.
@Auroradream When a cuddle is good it provides and equal amount of empathy, kindness, good will and positivity to both participants. I have only cuddled with pros, and every time it is two people enjoying a cuddle and not one person simply providing comfort to the other, the way it should be. When you say that the payment validates the empathy, kindness, good will, and positivity, what validates it for those you cuddle with if they are providing the same back to you?
@btc13 you asked: " If you assume that you will choose with whom you cuddle exactly the same way that you would as an enthusiast, and that the cuddle arrangement is unchanged also (host vs guest, etc), but also get paid for it, would you?"
It's an untenable hypothetical because that situation would never happen for a male pro cuddler. As far as I can tell, male pros here have trouble getting any customers, let alone the ones they'd most like to cuddle with.
But to answer your question: no, I would not charge for cuddling for the reasons I already stated.
@cuddlemepurple6 you said: "i find it weird using family members to try to get any point across is weird… it’s not the same kind of interaction at all."
Exactly my point. It's weird because "platonic cuddling" isn't truly and completely "platonic" in the same way other "platonic" activities are. If I told you I engaged in platonic interactions with my nieces such as going for a walk, or treating them to lunch, or playing board games with them, you wouldn't think there was anything weird about that, right? So why is "platonic cuddling" different? Because there's physical contact and a certain type of intimacy (though non-sexual) involved that's inappropriate for interactions with coworkers, family members, et al.
@btc13 since you asked me directly, when I need to receive a level of attention, empathy, or good will I reach out to my significant other and my close circle of friends who know and understand me. I don't share details of my personal life and emotional needs with ones whom I'm providing cuddle services. If I were feeling emotionally low, I'd not be planning cuddle sessions until my energy was more full for sharing.
@FitSmartCuddler You were the one who presented the hypothetical that the male pros are in high demand from women, exactly the reverse of the current environment. For you to say now that the situation would never happen is irrelevant since that hypothetical was the premise of your original post.
@Auroradream I think that the disconnect between our ideologies is that you are viewing cuddling as a therapeutic service that you are providing to a client who requires some level of emotional support, while I view cuddling as an enjoyable experience in which both are equal participants. All of the cuddles that I have had have been the latter.
@FitSmartCuddler it seems what you are saying is that even if there were an opportunity to make money cuddling, you wouldn’t choose to do it. Nothing wrong with that - there are plenty jobs I’m qualified to do and would compensate me well, but I just won’t apply to them because doing them just wouldn’t sit well with me. I choose to do the things which give me joy and in my opinion make the world a better place to live. Case in point - when I was my senior year in college I recall Philip Morris having a prominent booth set up at a college job fair, I distinctly recall not even bothering to talk to them to ask about opportunities with them, as I just didn’t want to be a part of what they were providing the world.
But then, I do host group cuddle events regularly - not because they move the needle as far as my income (maybe negatively, if at all) but because I believe in what they offer the world.
@btc13, I don't think that these are just views but are facts
Some cuddling experiences are, as you said focused on enjoyment, while others are focused on therapy
Personally, I think both are of value
But most likely, all cuddling experiences are likely a mix of the two aspects, and what that mix is is likely different for the two who are cuddling
Also, it may be difficult to know what that mix is for the other without them telling you
@brownglucose "But seriously, how dare people compensate women for their time and emotional labor?"
I have no issue at all with women being pro cuddlers, because I understand the supply/demand relationship, but it is a bit insulting to say that women need to be compensated for time and "emotional labor" when the men are also spending time and whatever "emotional labor" is when they are participating in a cuddle.
Because I'm motivated by platonic closeness and intimacy with others.
@btc13 guess we will have to agree to disagree then.
@btc13 Quick question - how do you know every guy who hires a pro is actively participating in the cuddle, as opposed to just being on the receiving end? I am sure there are people who enjoy giving as well as getting, but that doesn't mean all do.
@btc13 no, what I was expressing is that I hope my inner beauty is the reason my cuddles have value as opposed to I look nice and it feels good.
@FitSmartCuddler
Platonic definition from Google-
It’s very weird to compare what is happening on this site to your nieces… 100%
You wouldn’t get into bed and cuddle them. This websites platonic cuddling is based off of adult humans and their need for touch and connection... but platonic as in no sexual intimacy. You don’t NEED to touch your family members or coworkers.
The comment is weird whether you explain what your brain is thinking or not. It’s skewed and uncomfortable to read a grown man comparing what he can be getting on this site to his niece and his relationship.
I would absolutely charge for my time. I thought about adding myself as a pro but my schedule is far too hectic. Any girl I've met has always expected payment for their time. In the era of inclusion and gender indiscrimination, why give a service away for free.
My personal experience is that transactional interactions do not satisfy my need for touch, and for connection, both of which are sort of important to enjoy cuddling.
BUT…
That’s MY experience. Your results will vary. And that invalidates neither my experience nor your experience.
BECAUSE…
Everyone is free to choose their own path to joy, happiness, contentment, or ease.
The only judgement I have on anyone’s personal experiences is: Consenting adults.
If it was consenting adults, joy to all of you.
If it wasn’t, I’m calling the cops.
@WriterGF I don't. I haven't been a part of every cuddle. I do know that there are also cuddles where the pro receives more than they give.
@Auroradream Male cuddlers do not have any inner beauty?
@brownglucose I don't even understand what you are talking about. You are disagreeing that male cuddlers also spend time in the cuddle? That makes no sense.
On this site, virtually every pro transaction the female is paid by the male. That is either purely supply and demand as I am saying, or there are no males that bring any value to a cuddle. Does anyone want to make a case for the latter?
Lmao, yes, we absolutely would. Don’t pretend otherwise.
I'm not sure if I understand the question...
A Pro, whether male or female, is by definition someone who charges for cuddles.
I guess an answer would be that, yes...a male Pro, whether in high demand or not, should charge for cuddles.
@btc13 you said: "@FitSmartCuddler You were the one who presented the hypothetical that the male pros are in high demand from women, exactly the reverse of the current environment. For you to say now that the situation would never happen is irrelevant since that hypothetical was the premise of your original post."
My hypothetical is different from yours. In my hypothetical, there is a demand for male pro cuddlers. In your hypothetical, there is a demand for male pro cuddlers and all the potential customers are women the male pro would like to cuddle with even if they weren't paying.
@RadiantHugs you said: "But then, I do host group cuddle events regularly - not because they move the needle as far as my income (maybe negatively, if at all) but because I believe in what they offer the world."
That's different--I would have no problem being an event host.
@cuddlemepurple6 you said: "The comment is weird whether you explain what your brain is thinking or not. It’s skewed and uncomfortable to read a grown man comparing what he can be getting on this site to his niece and his relationship."
It's not weird if you understand the point I'm making. You clearly don't.
@Case_y said: "I'm not sure if I understand the question..."
I created the thread. I wasn't asking a question, I was giving my answer to a question I've seen posed several times recently in various chats--i.e., "if there was a demand for male pro cuddlers, and you (a male) could charge for it, why wouldn't you?" I gave my response in the first post. Others have offered up their responses as well.
"A Pro, whether male or female, is by definition someone who charges for cuddles. I guess an answer would be that, yes...a male Pro, whether in high demand or not, should charge for cuddles."
Yes, certainly anyone who wants to be a pro can and will charge--that pretty much defines "pro."
I'm a pro, and I exchange genuine warmth and real connection with my cuddle partners. It's actually really easy to do if you love people in general, and the sensitivity and respect that should be expected in a session is present.
@biancalovecraft Do you have any customers that you would not cuddle with if they weren't paying you?
@CharlesGrove you said: "My personal experience is that transactional interactions do not satisfy my need for touch, and for connection, both of which are sort of important to enjoy cuddling."
Same here. Which is why I'm not interested in paid cuddling as either the giver or receiver of funds.
Sounds like you all figured it out. People who don't want to charge for cuddles should not no matter if they have the opportunity too, i agree whole heartedly. Those who choose to charge mad can whether man or woman should. I totally agree. Pro cuddles and the ones that pay for cuddles give to each other in a cuddle, or they don't you decide. My answer remains the same i would if i could but id probably enjoy it as much as i do when i pay for it, but id still do it.
@ReltvlyCanshes you said: "My answer remains the same i would if i could but id probably enjoy it as much as i do when i pay for it, but id still do it."
I suspect that you, and other guys here who have said they'd be a male "pro" if there was a demand for it, are possibly overlooking an important point. You most likely would not be able to pick and choose your clientele; you would have to be open to much broader age ranges and body types than you'd normally consider cuddling with when you're paying for it, or seeking out enthusiasts, not to mention personalities. It's almost a sure bet that the women you would most like to cuddle with don't have to pay you (or anyone) for cuddling. So then the question becomes: given this reality, would you still want to be a pro male cuddler with the understanding that this extremely liberal range of acceptance in clientele comes with the territory?