Has anyone here ever felt the person they were cuddling just wasn't someone they could talk to and enjoy on more than a physical level?
Yeah, I've experienced this. I prefer to cuddle with people I have more of a mental/emotional connection to - someone I would be friends with even if we never cuddled.
Absolutely
I can't even bring myself to seriously consider someone as a cuddle companion if I can't talk to him.
@Sunflowerfield Me, too. Friends with Cuddling Benefits!
Once a space and trust is created with someone, I don't mind the ebb and flow of conversation and silences, but I would be uncomfortable with not-talking and communicating.
If chemistry is there I don't need to have a full convo. In fact it sometimes takes away from the experience. A connection is important but it's not always verbal.
@BlueIris I agree because I think that the ability to communicate effectively is an important part of cuddling
I once cuddled with a girl from Japan who barely spoke even broken English. Reading and writing were decent but verbal was not. We figured it out naturally and it was, surprisingly, a nice change of pace.
Whatever fits your fancy.
I feel like due to social media and 120 characters or less, many young people have become horrible communicators.
I think it'd be fun to communicate and chat while cuddling, as I enjoy deep conversations.
That said, I'm also comfortable with silence, and would prefer if at least for part of the cuddle, if we didn't talk and just enjoyed 'being' together. I'm also a fairly strong introvert, and have had several times when I was young where I felt people talked at me, but didn't care for my opinion.
So it's nice when people can just 'be'. Music is fine, but not necessarily having to spend the whole time focused on conversation-ing.
I've had both types of cuddles, great intellectual conversation and silence. I'm comfortable with both so I usually leave it up to the clients preference.
My personal preference is that there has to be an intellectual connection of some sort. My friends and I regularly have long conversations on various topics from science to psychology. If I can't have that from a friend or partner the relationship stays pretty shallow. My brain tends to hold onto a ton of facts I've read so I'm pretty capable of talking about almost any subject and learning more about it from whomever I'm talking to.
@Giocuddles what an incredibly interesting conversation starter!!! I am curious how everything worked out for you.....
AS FOR ME.... a FEMALE ENTHUSIAST I find it incredibly enjoyable when people chat and also when you are just still. I love the conversations and sharing thoughts and ideas.... but I have also found that it is lovely when you can escape the toils and troubles of real life and not have to talk about all the things that are bothering you.
What about you boys? @pmvines @FunCartel @Sideon @Mmart ???
(I had to dig really deep in the forum abyss for THIS one!!!) AND guess what??? All of the threads were about boners, no pics, boys not finding cuddles Etc etc etc AD INFINITUM!!! 🤣😂😁
@sillysassy it seems the OP's account is not active anymore.
I'm curious about why you've opted to resurrect a three year old thread?
@BuggleBear , because @sillysassy is an oldie but a goodie Ha Ha got you back finally @sillysassy
Hahhhhaha @OhioMike you DID!!! What do YOU think about a conversationalist/non-convo person for a snuggle bear???
@BuggleBear I was being a little silly AND sassy because of the other posts that Spuds resurrected. Maybe a little TOO SASSY though!!. (And @Giocuddles is just deactivated.... I deactivate ALL the time.)
It's the zombpocalypse!! The dead are rising!! But they're all lovely threads so I have no complaints
@sillysassy , i deactivate all the time. All the cool people do it these days. hey I go with the flow when cuddling. talk/ don't talk. once I almost missed my flight because no chatting ...hmmmmmm
The most enjoyable cuddling sessions that I have had involved conversations that got way past the basics like what do you do for work, fun etc. When you can get into some depth regarding feelings, emotions, struggles and other areas of vulnerability is when the connection is made for me. Sharing true passions and dreams in life with another while cuddling gives me a very warm and cozy feeling. Of course that takes more than one or two sessions to get to a point where you feel comfortable going to places that you have not gone with family members or even friends. If you find a cuddle partner where this happens then you have struck gold. Oh, and BTW I have not had a bad cuddle experience just ones that made my heart sing. Just be kind.
I’ve been in relationships where I couldn’t enjoy someone on more than a physical, being-in-the-same-room-as-you, shared-history-between-us level. That’s a kind of hell all its own! My ex and I still remain great friends and would consider ourselves a good option as cuddle buddies but we are definitely not on the same intellectual level as each other so I’d never sought that need being met. As a pro, everyone gets a snuggle from me. In my personal life and relationships, whether we are cuddling or not, I like seeking out the folks who can reciprocate with me, on every level needed.
@Mmart, I totally agree; deep spiritual conversations about life are the best during platonic cuddling sessions; you and your cuddling partner being comfortable in your own skins with each other and letting go of all of the emotions, best cuddling sessions.
I’m glad this was resurrected. I agree that both are good for their own reasons. Being able to physically connect and just be comfortable together easily does not go hand-in-hand for me with the need for deep emotional & intellectual discussion. I have had amazing deep long-distance emotional connection here on Cuddlecomfort and amazing physical connection in person. Both are wonderful in their own way.
I can only cuddle with someone whom I have easy flowing conversation. I only feel safe meeting someone I trust is in the cuddle world for the same reasons I am. And that takes time, conversation and a little gut judgement.
@squeakytoy I am so glad you chimed in!!! Before the SPUDS prankster I had no idea that you could go to forum jail for resurrecting old threads. I know when I first joined I read ALL of the threads and never even posted a single comment until last year. I feel like those old threads are like dusty books in a library (I know I know.... OLD lady here who remembers paper in the books) and there is a beauty to be found in all of the experience from people who have been on here awhile. Its kind of fun to add on to it and see what still applies after a few years of cuddle comfort necrononsense.
@Catloaf I appreciate you ON SO MANY LEVELS!!! Thank you for being a PRO and for your beauty in the forums.
I completely agree that in my personal world it is a very balanced and reciprocal thing but for whatever reason the cuddle world has the ability to sort of mitigate.... Hmmmmm maybe there is a better word.... differences if you have a cuddle chemistry. There are those that have the ability to delve into deep philosophical realms and explore all of that along with the snuggle and then there are the times when ABSOLUTE SHENANIGANS abound and you don't have to have that in order to have an enjoyable time cuddling and sharing touches. It has been so intriguing and something I NEVER thought possible. Like @chococuddles said earlier (who I love and I am glad he is now back on the site after a hiatus) cuddling has the ability to transport you to JUST TOUCHING..... Even if they don't speak your language.
@Chris55555 WELCOME to the site!!!
@OhioMike You are a sillybear. Maybe YOU should change your user name to "@manwhorunsforplane" 🤣
@Mmart and @WKCuddles thank you for being beautiful humans. You both have such FABULOUS SMILES!!
I intellectualize all of my cuddles. That is why I cuddle in a tweed jacket with a novel and a pipe
@sillysassy, Thank you for your kind words. You add so much to this site.
@pmvines 😂😂😂 oooooohhhhhhh TWEED!!!! Or ANY jacket for THAT matter!!!
@WKCuddles awwwwww THANK YOU!! A big COVID 2020 welcome to YOU!!!
@sillysassy I think that rule about resurrecting old threads only applies if you resurrect one but have nothing meaningful to add to it (ie. just responding "Yes" on a 3-year old thread to bump it). You're injecting new life into them, so you're all good!
@pmvines Can you imagine if someone set up a cuddle corner in their home that was conspicuously surrounded by their diplomas and degrees, their Triple Nine Society certificate, stuff like that? Good lord. I wouldn't be able to take it, I'd have to leave.
@squeakytoy come to my cuddle room it smells of rich mahogany and high brow comedy
@sillysassy yes any coat so long as it isn't wool that stuff itches
The pro that I’m currently cuddling with is actually a very pleasant person to talk with. The problem is once the cuddling starts, I kinda get lost in the session and don’t end up saying much most of the time. Not a bad dilemma to have, but I guess it’s still a dilemma lol
@pmvines Does high brow comedy smell funny?
@CuddlesinSoCal I don't think that's a dilemma at all!!! "Once the cuddling starts..." @squeakytoy I LOVE him!!! 😁