I am a professional cuddler because I believe in the healing power of touch. I LOVE to cuddle. I am also accepting and non-judgemental of everyone. I have had wonderful cuddles with men and women, heavy and skinny, tall and short, people I have found attractive and not, young and old. Some were eloquent and thoughtful in their messaging and some I could barely get a few words out of. Just because someone starts a conversation with "Hi, how are you" doesn't mean they don't need someone to hold them and make them feel safe. Just because they aren't great spellers or have difficulty putting there thoughts in a message doesn't mean that they deserve to have me disregard them as if they aren't good enough to cuddle with me. We are all here for the same reason (and those who aren't, shame on you). We love human touch and want to share it with the world. We all have our own way of screening potential cuddlers, which is fine, but I do suggest being sympathetic and empathetic to the needs of the other person when communicating.
@Franckincense Thank you for you respectful response. And making a better statement then I could do.
I had try to keep my response respectful and neutral... but did surprise me to see that I had triggered such aggressive response and thought best to leave things alone.
But I do think it best to encourage males to be just as careful and learn from females. Males have bad habit of taking chance and even defending others that it is not in there best interest.
Political, religious and culture views. Will come up in cuddling as people talk and open up more. This can be best to learn early. For you maybe dealing with some one easily triggers as these women have shown. And best to avoid for the dangers they can bring into once life. And granted Men can be just as bad.
Yet there can be people with different view and they will show respect for your views... they are rare people but make good friends to learn some thing new from. And have a intelligent debate with.
This post has turned shallow and more about how men should be better pick up artist. So as to make women happy. If man wants to be that way he be better off just going to club/bar to find a fling.
Focusing only on making the woman happy. And man not being honest with who they are is bond to leave them feeling incomplete. And very hurt and confused with them self in time.
One thing I’ve found in both business and online is that people simply don’t read.
I will usually put bullet points or numbered lists of things that need to be followed up on or answered for things to move forward. More often then not most of the things will not even be mentioned let alone finished.
I even have in my profile an idea of what to send to me in a first message. It’s obvious that it has never been read when I am messaged. Also it’s obvious when they ask me common questions that the answers are already listed on my profile.
It’s one of my huge pet peeves that in general people don’t read anything throughly enough to respond comprehensively. I know it’s mostly because yes there is a lot vying for people’s attention or they are answering hundreds of emails a day. But it still irks me because it just means there is yet another email that has to be sent which adds to the problem.
Anyway long rant aside, I think the key to communication is not only writing but also reading. Take the time you need to read then think about your options to respond.
Also, for those that aren’t as good socially. Google is a great help. Search something like “sample message to get to know someone” Google is great for finding ideas you can repurpose into your own. I use t a ton for ideas of how to approach a delicate situation or even write something like a business letter.
@Scarlette Wow that's really nice what you wrote. Your attitude towards your clients, as described in your last post, is what makes you a true professional IMHO, and not only that but a nice caring human being too.
@WilliamD Yes I have a bad habit of sometimes jumping in to defend others even when there's no benefit to me. I'll choose to see it as a positive trait though. :-)
@GeekCuddles I've experienced similar problems on dating sites. I might write an intro letter to some lady, perhaps 3 or 4 paragraphs containing maybe 4 questions. If I'm lucky she'll respond at all, and it will often be a single sentence answering just one of those 4 questions.
I realise that I am posting for the wrong gender but for me....
A lot of the people on this site have no profile. I don't care if you've not posted a picture but you do need to write something.
@BlueIris could have just as easily said 'Any message that a someone writes saying anyone has been impolite in messages to them cannot logically or reasonably be argued with. That is their experience and those are their perceptions.' @Frankincense, would you have had a problem with what she wrote, had she worded it that way? It seems to me that you are trying to turn this into a men vs women argument, when there should be no argument at all. Someone stating their perspective on something can't really be argued with, as @BlueIris said, because it is that person's experience.
In my opinion, there is too many attempts in this forum to make others wrong. I have seen these attempts from both men and women. I may have even been guilty of it myself, but I hope not. We all need to try harder to not create friction on this site. It was created to promote platonic cuddling. The word platonic means love on a higher level. How can we promote this love while fighting among ourselves, and trying to make each other wrong?
@I_am_Polylover I'm not the one who turned it into a men vs women argument, because BlueIris did that already with the way she worded her post. She specifically made it about women having the prerogative to decide the intent of the sender of a message: If a woman decides that a man was impolite or creepy or whatever, then he most definitely was being impolite or creepy or whatever - NO ARGUMENT.
Well that's just wrong. And yes even if she had worded it in a gender-neutral way I would still have a problem with her statement because, as I explained in my post to her, it is the intent of the sender that determines whether a message is impolite. If someone intends to be nice and polite but, because of language or cultural differences, comes across as impolite, does that mean the message was impolite? No, it means the receiver mis-interpreted (or was not able to correctly interpret) the message.
(Edited, because I accidentally got two threads mixed up.)
@Frankincence , the statement from @BlueIris was not about men vs women at all. It was about how the message being received by a person is what they interpret and if that is their interpretation then its hard to argue with that. It is about the message sender taking responsibility for how their message is received, and for how they are sending it, Cant always assume that the perception of what you do or say is the fault of the receiver, need to look at yourself and how the message is being sent. So yes, you have made it about men vs women when that was not really what was expressed. Its was about message vs perception. It may have been used to reference some of the women on this site, but the message and content of her statement is actually genderless.