How did you get started?

Elizabeth0856

Hi everybody, I’m very new to this whole concept and this website. I’m curious to know how other people learned of it, got involved, etc.? Anything you feel like you wanna share about it. I’m interested in being hugged, being held, being cared about, being heard, and that’s what led me to even learn that this existed. How do you initiate conversations without sounding like a creeper? I would definitely want to get to know somebody first before I let them touch me, hug me, hold me. Does that make sense? How do people go about this? Let’s chat

I saw it on Good Morning America years ago but I was in a relationship at the time. Me and my best friend used to take turns doing massage, scratch, and light touch on each other's backs growing up. And since I've always been very friendly, compassionate, and affectionate. I just knew this was something I could do. Not to mention I was affection deprived in the 3 long term relationships I've had throughout my life. I joined CC in 2022 when I became single, although I didn't really understand how the platform worked and was very nervous. So I just ending up putting it on the back burner In 2024 I was going through very hard times, so I decided to rejoin. My profile still showed active, so I started messaging people who had messaged me and before you know it I kept getting more and more requests. I can honestly say that I regret not starting when I initially joined. I've met so many amazing people along the way. I've been doing it for 2 years now and I'm forever grateful on the impact it's had on my life. All my life I've always been self conscious and very vulnerable, but now I'm a stronger, wiser, more confident person and I thank the site; as well as everyone that I've other cuddled or chatted with for that.

I totally understand where you're coming from and it can be a little frightening being new to it all. But you have to start somewhere lol. A quick video chat or phone call really helps break the ice so you feel a little more comfortable when you go in. Always start with a hug and just go in acting like you've known them forever. I know, easier said than done, especially since you're bound to run across someone who may have ill intentions. But you're in control of this and it's all about consent. There's so much info to share and/or approaches to take with it. I can say that I've learned and gotten better along the way. I'm a people person, so it's easy for me to carry a conversation. And just reading the Karma that gets left for me and the impact I've been able to have on some people's lives is so fulfilling.

I hope some of this helped a little. But feel free to message me and I'll help you in any way I can. I wish you all the best and happy cuddling! 🤗

“How do you initiate conversations without sounding like a creeper?”
Hi there, thought I’d reply because the first way to not sound like a creeper is to read someone’s profile and comment directly. You say you “like to cuddle while Watching a movie.”
Now you’re talking my language!
Also in your profile, you are married. Great!
Before this thread goes sideways, I would like to point out that your interests of being hugged, held, cared about, and heard, ALL can be done within a traditional movie date (presumably with your husband)!
Yes, I’m biased. Some good, provocative movies are in the theater currently and worth making time to go.
(Yes, you can snuggle under a blanket and choose from thousands of titles from your couch. Booo!)

@friendlyj311 - thank you for everything you said, I love that. I love hearing your journey. It gives me a lot more confidence to maybe reach out or accept an invitation from someone. I truly believe that human touch is so life affirming and necessary. And when we don’t have it, we crave it.

I heard about professional cuddlers years ago-don’t remember exactly when.

I did a Google search for pro cuddlers and found this site last January because I was going through some rough times (my mom passed and I got laid off in the span of like 3 weeks).
I lurked around for a while to figure out how this works and eventually took the plunge.
I found that for me, the initial awkwardness faded quickly.

As to how to initiate a conversation-use information from their profile to figure out a jumping off point, and ask them if they want to talk about cuddling in the future. The good news is that everyone here (mostly everyone) is looking for the same thing, and I have found a few really amazing people through this site.

Good luck and happy cuddling! 🙂

@hugpoweredhuman thank you! I love your username btw! Lurking around is a great way to put it and that’s pretty much what I’m doing. I’m looking forward to a good hug and cuddle session at some point

In a google search for caregiving jobs.

I was like, I love cuddling… I remembered it’s a profession and so I found this place. Why not help others meet their needs as well as my own?

I had been in a few relationships where I was touch-starved, and at one point I was talking to an online friend about how lonely I was feeling. They suggested that rather than searching for another relationship, I try finding a professional cuddler. I honestly didn't even know that was a thing, so I did a Google search and eventually found this website.

I almost cried during my first cuddle session because it had been so long since I had experienced that kind of warmth and affection. It helped me more than I expected.

In a way, it also helped me avoid jumping into a relationship with just anyone simply because I was lonely or craving physical affection. Instead, it allowed me to be more discerning about choosing someone who is genuinely compatible with me, while also becoming more comfortable with being single in the meantime. I can meet some of those needs through cuddling with others, whether they're professional cuddlers or enthusiasts, without feeling like I need to find a relationship to experience physical affection.

On the plus side, I think my cuddling skills have improved quite a bit since I first joined years ago! It has also taught me that cuddling can exist outside of a relationship or dating and doesn't always have to lead to something more.

Overall, I think being part of this community has positively influenced me as a person and has helped me develop a healthier perspective on physical affection, intimacy, and relationships.

@CSnMUS87 This is great! I appreciate you sharing your story. That’s how I feel, kind of physically starved of affection, and actually emotionally starved of affection. So, since I’m married and not trying to step out and have an affair, I’m just trying to find a way that might be a safe way to get some needs met so that I don’t shrivel up and die. I feel so vibrant on the inside, but I don’t express it at all anymore. I just feel so small. So I really appreciate your journey and finding great people that have helped you along the way in healing.

I was randomly scrolling Reddit when a post mentioned the site, ended up looking it up, signing up to see what it was about, and ran into someone I knew IRL. We talked a bit and she shared a bit of her experience but what got me into actually meeting someone was reaching out to someone near by who had an interesting profile. We really just talked about her experience here, how expectations and boundaries beyond what are mentioned in the rules should be addressed, how it's okay to take your time to get comfortable with who you're talking to.

She was between partners and so we decided to meet and ended up cuddling pretty frequently!

As for reaching out, I generally won't reach out to anyone with just a picture unless there's actually something happening there like a cool event or cosplay or something that tells me a little about them. I usually look through a profile though, read their bio, and I'll reach out if anything strikes a chord with me, even if it's just to chat.

Hi, welcome @Elizabeth0856! I’m also just starting out on this site, so your question really resonates.

My story: I’m Brazilian, and on a trip back home I noticed again how affectionate everyone is. One night, some friends there asked me how people in the UK cope without touch because they had the impression that "British people were too cold". I didn’t have a good answer, so I went home, started researching, and found cuddle therapy. I felt the calling and joined CC straightaway even though I was going to be abroad for a few months.

It also happened that I was looking for a new career, since AI is eating into my old one, so it felt like a perfect fit. I’m now halfway through my Cuddle Professionals International (CPI) training. It’s a real investment of time, money and energy, but I love it. So much to learn and practice!

And thank you @friendlyj311 for sharing your story and your tips so openly. It’s really encouraging to hear how much this has changed things for you, and the advice about a quick video or phone call first is just as useful for those of us on the giving side.

Wanting to get to know someone before any touch makes complete sense, and asking the way you did is the opposite of creepy. Take it at your own pace!

Cat 🐾

I registered an account on this website many years ago but didn't really do much here back then. Earlier this month, however, I had my first experience with a pro cuddler (though booked on another site), and it went very well! So now I'm bit with the bug again, so to speak. The other site I used doesn't have a forum, so I'm back here and hoping to meet some more likeminded people. 🤗 Happy Halloween, everyone!

@Rew thank you for sharing that, what made you catch the bug? What was your session like? I’m not trying to be intrusive. I’m just trying to understand. Because, Idk, what do you do? Just meet up and hug and lay down together and snuggle up? I mean, maybe it’s a simple as that, I just can’t wrap my head around it at the moment even though I want to. No judgment here none at all I swear. I’m just trying to find out kind of, maybe, what people do on their cuddle sessions, how long are they, where do people meet? Do people meet up first for coffee or something? If you or anyone else is willing to share, please do, I’d love to learn more. 💗

I trained with Platonic Touch work at a nonprofit organization, and was privileged to learn from doctors, authors, and experts who came in and trained us. I moved across the country, and was discussing with a friend how I missed doing that. He said he had used a site during his divorce and had a great experience, and he directed me here. I love it so far, and I have met some fantastic people along the way.

I understand it can be hard to wrap your mind around it if you've always associated cuddling with romance. But I don't, I cuddle friends, so it makes total sense to me. And it offers a level of emotional safety that is different than a romantic relationship.

@Elizabeth0856 No worries! I don't mind sharing.

Earlier this year, I kind of realized how touch-starved I've been lately, so I started getting back into things like contra dancing (which I hadn't done since before COVID). I remember that I'd ventured onto this forum a long while back, so out of curiosity I googled professional cuddlers in my area. I found one that was relatively close to my town and sent her a message introducing myself and asking how sessions worked. She responded politely and answered my questions. I booked with her, and for safety reasons we agreed to meet up in a public place for lunch before the session proper (I'd also sent her my photo ID so she could verify who I was). I communicated beforehand that I was nervous with it being my first time doing anything like this, and she was very understanding.

We met for lunch at a local deli, where we got to know each other. Then we went to my place, where we changed into sweats, and she opened the cuddle session with a hug. It was a 2-hour session, and for the first 45 minutes or so, we cuddled on the couch and listened to music, resting in each other's arms, sometimes talking, sometimes silent. Then we moved to the bedroom and spooned on the bed; this was much more quiet, as we were becoming very comfortable with each other. (I think one or both of us almost fell asleep, haha.) We ended the session by giving each other a massage, mainly in the shoulders/neck area. This last part I had asked her about beforehand, and she consented. Finally, we hugged goodbye, and she later texted me to let me know she got home safely, and we both thanked each other for a nice time. I certainly plan to cuddle with her again in the future!

I hope this post isn't TMI? (I'm new to this forum, so I'm not sure what's allowed and what isn't. I'm neurodivergent, so sometimes I overshare. 😝) But I don't mind going into detail because it sounds like you wanted some details. The important takeaways are communication and consent. Communicate your comfort level with a potential cuddle partner, and if you're ever unsure about anything, ask for consent. A good pro cuddler will know how to put you at ease and let you enjoy your time with them! ☺️

Three years ago, I was vacationing with a beautiful woman, enjoying life and feeling connected. Since then, life has taken a very different turn. I’ve spent the last three years working full-time while being a caregiver for my mom. It’s been an incredibly rewarding experience, but also emotionally and physically exhausting.

For the past three years, I haven’t really traveled or ventured more than 60 miles from home. Between work, caregiving responsibilities, and the fatigue that comes with it, my own social life and personal needs have taken a back seat.

I miss human connection, affection, and simply having a moment where I can relax and feel cared for myself. For me, cuddling isn’t just about physical touch. It’s about comfort, connection, stress relief, and taking a little time to recharge. It was time I did something for myself.

I started back in 2017 early in the year on a different site and from that site the person who cuddled with me told me about this site and I started in August of that year. It has been a lovely experience! The cuddles are never disappointing.

Chatgpt told me this cite haha

@splitdrawcanvas You seem like a very interesting person, older than your years. I read your profile. And I can relate to what you’re saying I am a caregiver also to a family member and it can be exhausting. And I can relate to your other statement about this, not being about physical touch, because honestly, I’m not actually very much of a hugger, but I do get stressed and burned out and now when I feel the need for physical touch, I don’t have it. So this is my exploration phase. We shall see how it ends out!

I’m so glad I asked this question because it seems like such great people are answering. And it’s restoring my faith in humanity a bit. Thank you everybody who keeps answering and telling me your story.!

@Elizabeth0856 , interestedly enough, correct I’m not much of a hugger. As an introvert i avoided most "contact" over the years. I m loving cuddling though.

Hi Elizabeth, I signed up onto this site when I list my dad. Felt a different kind if a void in my life. Almost like a fear within me. I was nervous at first asking even the pros for sessions. But, overtime this site has been there when I needed it the most. Since then I have expressed amazing cuddlers out of which a few have turned to be good friends, till today. We do shows, lunches n stuff together. Love being here. Hope you rest your dear aside n venture into it with an open mind. You will have fun.

I actually stumbled across this site while trying to figure out how to fill a void in my life. My wife went through breast cancer, and while I'm incredibly grateful she's still here and doing well, the surgery and hormonal changes really affected her desire for physical intimacy. It's been a difficult adjustment, because that need for closeness, affection, and human touch never went away for me. I love my wife, and I have no interest in cheating or doing anything that would betray our marriage. But at the same time, I miss being held, touched, and just feeling that connection with another person. I started looking for something that could provide that comfort without being sexual, and that's how I ended up here.
I guess I was just looking for a little affection and human connection without all the complications. Sometimes you don't realize how much you miss something as simple as being close to someone until it's no longer part of your everyday life.

Still trying to get started here. Unfortunately lots of the people in my area haven't been online in months-years and the few that are within a pretty far distance that I'd be willing to drive are not replying to messages. Also I'm not interested in going with pros so it feels like it's tough to start for me.

Hello Group,

My profile sums up my recent beginnings but I would like to elaborate.

I have been married to my best friend for 19 years. Me with all my flaws and her with hers for better or worse. She has always suffered from some form of anxiety and OCD since I have known her. The anxiety has taken many forms. Over the last several years that anxiety has manifested as what professionals call Haphephobia. It is a phobia around being touched. This means I had to put my needs aside for a long time. Intimacy relations aside, what I truly missed was loving physical contact.

It was during a massage appointment with a reputable healer, she noticed that I was hypersensitive to touch. She introduced me to a term that I learned to identify with, Touch Starved. For the first time, I had someone look inside my soul and exposed my pain.

Nothing changed for a while but I did have a diagnosis. Which was the first step. Fast forward a year later, I started seeing a psychologist and a counselor to deal with my ADHD and recent insomnia. During a therapy session, my therapist mentioned Cuddle Therapy when I confided in him my relationship issues.

I am cautiously adventurous. Meaning, I will try anything once so long as I’ve done my research and I know I am not breaking the law or my personal ethics. After extensive google searches, I worked up the nerve to call a local Cuddle Therapist. (BTW, I dont like how this site calls the professional cuddlers “Pros”).

I entered into the session well prepared but with butterflies in my stomach. Those butterflies immediately were gone as soon as she hugged me at the door. Needless to say, it was a wonderful session. Conversation was warm and engaging but most importantly I immediately felt a sense of mutual security and warmth in the arms of a total stranger. The hour flew by.

That night and every night since, I have had no trouble sleeping and I feel as though my relationship has improved.

It is my new medicine. I have even opened up to my wife about needing more physical contact in our relationship and she has agreed to make a concerted effort to work on being more receptive to my needs. Until then, I am finding comfort in this community.

@rbzona I really appreciate your story! Your honesty is beautiful. I’m so glad you are finding healing. I hope for the same. I think there are great people here

@Elizath0856. Thank you. First step for healing is being honest to yourself. I spent the last ten years denying my feelings and sleeping in a separate bedroom from my wife to avoid conflict. Saying the quiet part out loud is also therapeutic. Life is too short and too precious to live in denial. I hope for you that you find the same truths and live healthier and happier with the help of this community. ❤️🤗

@Elizabeth0856 Welcome to Cuddle Comfort! It's cool that Gemini AI knew enough to send you here!

You asked, "How do people go about this?"

If you browse some female profiles you will see there are "enthusiasts" such as yourself and "professionals" who charge an hourly rate for a cuddle session. On the search page you can look for only enthusiasts, only pros, or both.

From my perspective as a male, meeting an enthusiast vs a professional is typically very different. A female professional generally accepts a booking from nearly anyone (unless there a red flags). When meeting with a professional, we usually jump straight into cuddling, perhaps after a short introductory discussion about boundaries. Most professionals don't spend time with clients outside of a paid cuddle session (although a few do).

By contrast, a female enthusiast is typically more selective, does not meet with every man who contacts them, and often wants to take time getting to know the other person by meeting in public, maybe several times, before having a cuddle session.

Professionals are required to have a photo on their profile. Enthusiasts are not. If a person does not have a photo on their profile, it is highly recommended to ask for one before meeting in person. You can attach your photo to a private message without posting it on your public profile.

Professionals are forbidden from exchanging contact info before booking a session through the website. Enthusiasts are free to exchange contact info with other enthusiasts whenever they want. This is typically done when you're ready to meet in person, or if another mode of communication is more convenient than exchanging messages on the website.

What you do in a cuddle session is up to you. Think about what you would feel most comfortable with: at your place, at their place, in a public park, taking a walk, sitting up, lying down, on a couch, on a bed, holding hands, hugging, holding each other, back rubs, etc.

I hope you find a good match nearby!

You might also search online for a cuddle party or cuddle meetup, though you would probably have to travel to a bigger metro like Atlanta. A cuddle party will often begin with an introductory workshop on consent, asking for what you want, practicing saying "no," and other relevant topics.

@rbzona powerful words- saying the quiet part out loud… Thank you for that

@CuddlesToGo that is a really great explanation of how things go. I really appreciate that. I’ve been on here less than a week, so it’s clearly not been very long, and at the same time I don’t wanna end up on dateline! All I wanna do is meet an empathetic person that I can talk to and be held for a little bit and see how that makes me feel. Hoping over time I will eventually come across this type of person who actually lives near me lol