How would a pro cuddler feel if a client wanted to do this?

notcuddledyet

If you had a regular client who you'd seen a few dozen times at least and who wanted to make a pledge that you were the only woman they cuddled (even though it was absolutely not expected or wanted back) would you think it was weird or a compliment?
If they wanted to have a sort of unofficial ceremony where the client said "I pledge to you that you are my cuddler. I vow that you are the only woman I will seek close physical contact with, pro or otherwise, platonic or otherwise and your cuddles give me complete satisfaction" and the pro cuddler replied "I accept your pledge and your vow and as your cuddler will offer you, though not you alone cuddles and contact it brings"
Would you see it as silly, weird or a compliment that the man wanted to do that?

ILikeWarmHugs

How is this even a discussion? lol I would think that’s very weird.

Yeah, if I were a woman I think that'd freak me out. It's maybe one step away from "I pledge to you that you're the only person I stalk."

That kind of single-minded focus wouldn't strike me as much of a compliment. "You're so special to me that I'll never cuddle anybody but you! Even if I get a girlfriend, or a wife, even if I visit my sisters or my mom, I won't cuddle them—no one but you! Only ever you!"

Might be grounds for a restraining order.

notcuddledyet

I'd be interested to hear from a pro cuddler. The men on here to seem to be quite critical and non empathetic sometimes. Sometimes they can just be hurtful.

Not to mention the enbies. We're downright blunt and it's not always fun for the reader.

[So long as we're lumping people into groups and assigning stereotypes... hey, I don't want to be left out!]

notcuddledyet

but being blunt and getting a kick out putting people down will discourage people from freely expressing their thoughts

@notcuddledyet: There's exactly one person I wouldn't be freaked out by if they did what's suggested here. But this is because I've known them for... what's it been, eight years now? Nine? Anyway, I know them really well—very, very well—and even in their case I'd consider it a bit of an inconvenience.

Oh, so I'm responsible for all your physical touch needs now? Hooray....

notcuddledyet

@DarrenWalker fair point

notcuddledyet

I asked the question so people could say yes to it or no to it and I can take either answer. When I'm effectively told not to ask the question then that isn't nice and if everyone stopped asking questions then the forum would die.

Except for all the topics that aren't about asking questions. Like the music thread, the quote of the day thread, the cuddle experiences thread, the story-telling thread....

But yeah, I don't mind that you asked the question. If you hadn't asked it, I wouldn't have gotten to be disturbed.

Invalid_Format

I don’t think it’s weird at all, it’s standard fetish behavior. He wants to be your slave, and the ritual is a part of it. 🤷🏻‍♀️ If it’s all in good fun, why not? Except that this site doesn’t support that, so maybe that’s why he’s using different language.

cuddlebunny777

As a professional, I would think it's very weird and as stated by @Invalid_Format, it is definitely fetish behavior and not supported on this site. Especially when you mention the whole ceremony/ritual, it is definitely a fetish thing.

However, I can see where it may be a compliment for some women, but that is purely subjective.

littermate

I think it takes all types and people are all different. From one person, it would be silly. From another, it would be weird. From another, it would be a compliment. So I say, I'd have to feel into the context. Maybe it's just sweet for that person to proclaim their undying devotion to one's cuddling and that's okay. I mean, sheesh, we do get all bond-y here don't we, snuggling each other like they're our very own? So in sum, I'd have to be there to grok the sitch to give you much more than just, hmmm, interesting, any of the above or something else entirely.

mike_honcho

@notcuddledyet ...and i suppose that you’re not concerned with your client, and his feelings, if he were to read this thread?

im confidently guessing that you didn’t find it as a compliment, otherwise you would not feel the need to ask others what they think of his request. my opinion is that his suggestion is no more weird than the fact that you’ve had around 50 cuddle sessions with him. sounds like your guy is pretty darn needy...possibly obsessive?

your thread lacks your response to him and what i think it also needs is you to confess what your feelings are about his request.

littermate

What if @notcuddledyet is actually asking for himself because this is how he feels toward his cuddlemate? And he wants to find out if s/he would find it weird to have such a ceremony?

alphares

she's a cuddler not a wife

Groucho

A married, celibate, picture collector with a fetish...Nothing to see here folks, keep moving

Chocolatetreat

Im praying for the pros out here

Groucho

@Chocolatetreat LOL
Let's form a prayer chain

Wow!I cant even believe that this kind of question is being asked. This is pure control behavior and the beginnings of a very abusive relationship. There is nothing flattering about this. This man is saying that once he commits himself to "you" that you are the only one he wants to cuddle with. the expectation will lead to "when are you going to only cuddle with me" or something similar. Refuse to play the "your the only one " game and it could turn very violent and abusive. Best to walk away now while, before it becomes a dangerous situation. Nothing good every came from behavior where you are literally cutting everyone else out of it. These are RED FLAG SIGNS THAT SHOULD NOT BE IGNORED!

hogboblin

@DarrenWalker

Such a thing would be extremely inconsiderate of me. It’s also stupid in a multitude of different ways.

The behavior described by the OP is eerily juvenile. If I were a professional cuddler, and any of my clients even hinted at such a contract, I’d be in quite the conundrum.

On one hand, I’d want to scream “no” and then make a quick escape. On the other hand, I’d be worried about getting caught and turned into a lampshade.

BoomerSpooner

Does not matter if it is weird or silly, I just think it is a creative way to be blocked by the recipient. I imagine, pro or not, that if one heard it they would wonder why John Hinckley was now coming for them instead of Jodie Foster.

In some ways, it can sound more terrifying than the everyday boundary pushing that goes on because it has the ring of I want to cross over the line into your personal life. That may not be the intention but it has the trappings of obsession and a lack of awareness of the emotional dirt being disturbed,

In short, never utter or write those words because it sounds like the type of person who wants to get married after the first date. It reeks of desperation.

cuddlerforu24

@ notcuddleyet. Before you go through with such ceremony and vow think of the ramifications;
Your File is sent to All cuddling agencies and website , you are forever cursed as to not ever hire another

Your selected pro cuddler now has a monopoly on you as will periodically raise rates as they see fit , even 2x or 3x the annual CPI or increase / barrel of oil ,I think they are delighted to have such a cash cow

In order to “ unvow” a one time liquidated damages charge of $xxxxxx.xx is applied, plus monthly

Seriously....the mention of platonic or” otherwise “ ,define otherwise .... could be red flag to the cuddler)

notcuddledyet

@cuddlerforu24 Yes I know that but it isn't something you'd do if you didn't have the trust that you wouldn't be charged the standard rate.
@FunCartel It isn't something that you would ever discuss unless you'd seen the same person for several years and knew each other very well. It would be at the stage where she was your only pro cudder and you could chat like old friends.
@Ineedcuddles55 I specifically said it wasn't two way. Personally, I really wouldn't want to be the pro cuddlers sole client and have to cover her entire living expenses rather than just a hundred or so a week. Many people are exclusive to their employer without the employer being exclusive to them, they only take their car to one garage whilst the garage have many other cars and they only order Chinese food from one place even though they sell food to many customers. There is no hint that anyone doing this would like the pro cuddler to reciprocate by having him as the only client.

SweetCamiXO

A ceremony or pledge is way too much. I feel like the only reason someone would share that information is because they would expect the other person to do the same. No one should expect a pro to cuddle with one person exclusively, even if you’re a regular. I personally want to help as many people as I can and meeting awesome people is one of the reasons I enjoy being on CC. To cuddle with only one person kind of defeats the purpose of being a pro, IMO. I would view that persons behavior as a red flag and probably see that person a lot less or just stop seeing them completely.

pmvines

Yes Clarise this is what I would like for us. Ththththththth

notcuddledyet

@SweetCamiXO Thanks for your answer. It was great to hear from a pro cuddler giving an honest, direct point of view but in a totally respectful way.

Ontherun

Sounds like marriage. What about other clients pro cuddler has? Maybe they are regulars too.

UnionSuit

I think the men in this thread haven't been very respectful, but have offered a good picture of what is likely the case. As men, we understand that if we're pledging to someone else, we expect the same in return, as well as perhaps an effort to be available since we aren't getting our needs met anywhere else. This isn't a healthy situation. If you're able to break ties at this point, I think it would be in your best interest if you want no more than a client relationship with him.

BoomerSpooner

@UnionSuit First most of the posts have been respectful with the exception of a couple. Two, this is a non-pro male proposing to say this to a pro female that he clarified in a post that he has known for awhile. Still not a good idea to lay that “pledge” on someone as @SweetCamiXO noted.

littermate

I still don't think it's necessarily psycho. I think it might Just be relationally creative.